Life In Smash Mansion
by Bustman
Summary: When Super Smash Bros. Fray, the fourth installment of the Super Smash Bros. series, goes into development, the smashers are called back to Smash Mansion. And they are not happy about it.
1. Letters Go Out

Life In Smash Mansion

Bustman: Hi! This is my first story here, and I'm excited to show it to the world! I hope it's not horrible... if it is, I won't give up, and make my chapters even better! Anyways, today we have the man of the hour giving us our disclaimer! Come on in here, Captain Falcon!

Captain Falcon: (walks in, smiling and waving to the audience. No one except one lone man claps; he has a bottle thrown at his head and falls unconscious) Wassup, dawgs? Being here is da bomb, man! Anyways, ladies and gentlemen, Bustman does not own any the fic, okay? So, er... (looks at watch) I've still got 5 minutes left on stage, so... who wants to watch my dance routine?

(Screaming erupts from the crowd, and they all head in a mad flurry for the door, pushing to get out. Captain Falcon is left on the stage, performing his dance for a blind and deaf old man, the only person left sitting in the crowd.

Bustman: (Speeding up the clock 5 minutes) Oh, times up, Captain Falcon! Off you go! Anyways, if you write a review, please tell us who you would like to to our disclaimer next time, and we'll take it into consideration! Enjoy the story!

* * *

Peach walked into her house, humming and dancing through the doorway. She was in a particularly happy mood today; the renovation of her house was finally complete! It now had 13 bedrooms, 28 bathrooms, 4 landury rooms, 10 different living areas, 19 kitchens, 23 dining rooms, 9 porches and balconies, 2 libraries, 3 swimming pools, 4 ballet rooms, 2 gymnasiums, a bowling alley, and more closets filled with dresses then she had cared count. She danced into the kitchen, planning to make a celebratory cake.

She flipped through her many cook books and finally took down **Cakes: Everything You Need To Know About The Mouth-Watering Delicacy.** She flipped it open to the table of contents.

_Carrot Cake... now there's something I haven't made in a while. _She opened up to page 741 and scanned the recipe. Then, she got out a cushioned pink mixer, a hot pink pan, and a bright pink tray and got to work. In fact, _everything _Peach's house was pink, from the vegetables right down to the pipes. The only things that weren't pink in Princess Peach's house were the pictures of the man she loved, with that red suit to that handsome mustache... suddenly Peach got a spark of inspiration.

"I know!" She said aloud. "I'll invite Mario over for my cake! He'll be so happy; he does love his cake!" Peach, now with a new motive, began mixing the batter even harder, stirring as fast as Sonic runs...

_At Mario's house…_

"Mama Mia!" Mario yelled as his wrench accidentally screwed out the wrong nail, causing water to spray everywhere. "Luigi, help me find my-a nail."

"What'd you-a say, bro?" Asked Luigi, his bathing trunks on and a glass of lemonade in his hand, entering the pool of water that had formed. He took a breath and dived under, but emerged screaming. "Ahhhhh! My nose!!" He yowled, clutching it. There was a nail wedged in the middle. He began to run around in circles, still screaming.

"Thanks, little brother." Mario said, rolling his eyes. He plucked the nail from Luigi's nose, and screwed it back in to the pipe. The doorbell rang. "Luigi, will you get-a that?"

Still clutching his nose, Luigi walked over to the door. "Hello?"

The postman was standing in front of Luigi, a pink letter in hand. "Letter for Mr. Mario. And about 50 pounds of fan mail too. Oh, and a message from a Mr. Yoshi, who tells him that he needed his immediate help because of a skydive gone awry."

"Any fan mail for me today?"

"Hasn't been any in 20 years. What makes you think today will be any different?" He walked away, and Luigi sighed. He walked back to Mario, slamming the door shut.

"Letter." He mumbled, handing him the pink envelope. Mario curiously ripped it open.

_**Mario-**_

_**I am baking a carrot cake. Won't you come and join me to finish it?**_

_**Love,**_

_**Peach**_

Mario smiled. "Hey-a Luigi, want-a to come join me to travel over to Peach's mansion?"

"I don't know…"

"There's caaaaakkkkeeee."

Luigi jumped into a warp pipe. "What are you waiting for? Lets-a-go!"

Mario shook his head as Luigi sank in through the warp pipe. "Wait till he finds out that's the passage to Luigi's mansion."

Mario jumped into another warp pipe while he heard a distant scream erupt from the one Luigi had traveled into.

_Back at Peach's Mansion..._

"Top-a of the morning to you-a, princess!" Mario bowed to the princess after jumping out of his warp pipe. Peach giggled.

"I'm glad you're here. You had me worried for a second that I was going to have to eat this cake all by myself."

"You-a needn't worry about that, princess." Said Mario, who had just spotted the carrot cake cooling off on the counter and was now eyeing it hungrily. Suddenly Luigi popped out of the warp pipe behind Mario, looking around wildly.

"There were-a ghosts! Lots and lots of ghosts! I-"

"Calm down, Luigi. They're gone now. No more ghosts. Here, why don't you have a nice, hot slice of carrot cake, hmmm?" Peach soothed, handing Luigi a slice of carrot cake. He collapsed into a chair, glanced around as if a ghost was going to jump out of the shadows and attack him, and then started hungrily gobbling down the cake. Peach handed Mario a piece of cake too, giving him a kiss on the cheek as well. Mario turned beet red, and sat down next to Luigi.

"Hey-a, where is-a Luigi's kiss-a?" Luigi asked, turning his cheek to Peach. Luckily for Princess Peach, a distraction came at that moment. Bowser crashed through the roof and roared.

"You're mine, Peach!" Bowser growled, taking a step forward. "And so is that carrot cake!"

Luigi jumped out of his seat, screaming. He dived down the nearest warp pipe, where another distant scream could be heard of "Aaaaaah! Ghosts!"

"Wrong pipe." Peach commented. Mario dived in front of Princess Peach, in the way of Bowser, but slid past her in front of the carrot cake.

"Take one crumb and you're a dead turtle." Mario growled, facing Bowser. Bowser's face fell.

"Awww, that's no fair. Lets do Bubblegum."

"Nah, to dang predictable. Rock, Paper, Scissors is more fair."

"Fine, but two out of three."

"Agreed." Said Mario, ignoring Peach's mutter of "Y'know, some men put their women before their baked goods."

Mario lost with rock the first round, but then won with paper the next. He put out rock, but then changed it at the last second to scissors as he saw Bowser had done paper, hoping he wouldn't notice. Unfortunately…

"Cheater! You're mine, Mario!" Bowser said, leaping at him. Bowser and Mario wrestled on the floor, while Peach got a frying pan and started whacking them both, Bowser for trying to kidnap her, and Mario for his bad priorities. Meanwhile, Luigi had jumped out of the pipe and was running around in circles, screaming, while Yoshi fell through the chimney, looking utterly lost, and a parachute with a hole in it on his back. Suddenly, the door rang, and everybody froze, except for Yoshi, who was now unsteadily stumbling around, looking dizzy.

"Luigi, get it." Said Bowser, nodding toward the door. Mario wiped his brow as Luigi passed him, and Peach offered both him and Bowser lemonade, saying "Good fight, fellas."

Luigi opened the door just a crack to see that it wasn't a ghost, then opened it fully as he saw it was just the postman. "Letter for a Mr. Mario, a Mr. Bowser and a Mr. Yoshi, and one for a Miss Princess Peach too."

"Any for me?" Luigi asked dully, already expecting the answer.

"No- actually, yes!" Said the postman, shuffling through his mail and looking just as surprised as Luigi did. "Well I'll be…didn't think I'd live to see the day when anybody in their right mind would write a letter to Lui-"

But Luigi had already shut the door, dancing happily in to the room and throwing all the letters up into the air, doing a cheerful little jig, and singing "I got a letter, I got a letter…"

"What's this?" Bowser asked, picking up his own.

"Only one way to find out." Mario said, ripping his open.

"Looks like an invitation." Remarked Peach, already reading hers. "What's this? We've been invited to the next-"

"Super Smash Bros. game!" Luigi cried, overjoyed, reading over Peach's shoulder. "I just knew I'd be asked to come back, just knew they'd find a place for old Luigi…"

"But…this is impossible!" Cried Mario, as Luigi wiped a tear away from his eye from being invited to his fourth Super Smash Bros. game. "Brawl just came out 6 months ago!"

"This is an outrage!" Bowser yowled in agreement. "I'll strangle that Master Hand! As if my schedule wasn't busy enough as it is!"

"Hey, it isn't all that bad." Said Peach, remaining calm, but obviously pissed off as well. "At least we'll get to see all our friends from different videogames again."

"I've got all the friends I need here! Right Yosh-ewww." Mario scrunched up his face as Yoshi retched all over him.

* * *

Donkey Kong sweat as he swung through the trees, the whole forest just a blur. Diddy Kong swung ahead of him, turning around and giving him the raspberry.

"Come on, DK! What happened to king of the jungle? Hasn't this old ape got any swing left in him?"

"Pay – more – respect – to – your – elders!" Donkey Kong grunted, surpassing Diddy Kong, who put on a face of pure determination and swung faster then ever until he caught up to Donkey Kong again.

"I wonder why Dixie Kong sounded so urgent on my banana phone." Diddy Kong thought aloud, half to himself. "I haven't heard her so excited since her Uncle Basil was assassinated…by her."

"Yeah, he was a jerk." Donkey Kong said, jumping off a vine and onto his treehouse. Diddy Kong followed him inside, where Dixie was pacing on the rug.

"Ah, there you are!" She said, with an exuberant grin on her face. "You won't believe this!"

"I sure won't, until I get a cup of water." Donkey Kong panted, collapsing onto a bamboo chair. "Funky Kong, will you take care of that?"

"I sure will!" Said an ape sitting across from Donkey Kong, wearing sunglasses and a bandanna. "And I'll do it with _style!_"

"Yeah…you do that. Anyways, what is it, Dixie? You look like you might explode."

"Us three just got invited…to Super Smash Bros. Fray!"

"WHAT??" Diddy Kong yowled, grabbing a letter on the table. "That's impossible! I don't have time for another Super Smash Bros.! I'm already signed on for 3 videogames this year, and..."

"You're not excited?" Dixie Kong asked, crestfallen. "It may be busy, but at least you'll get to spend time with _me_, and all your friends."

"…You're right." Diddy Kong said, relaxing a bit. "But I don't like how Master Hand thinks he can call us up anytime and tell us he has to come to his game, like we don't have lives. Donkey Kong, what do you think?"

Diddy Kong looked over at Donkey Kong, who was now snoring on the couch. "Ah, well, we'll tell him the bad news in the morning…"

* * *

_Everybody dance now…_

"Mr. Falcon. Mr. Falcon! Mr. Falcon, sir, you have a letter!

"Wassup, dawg?" Captain Falcon asked, turning off his dance music and turning to face his butler, who was holding a letter. "A letter, you say, man? Does it put the 'awe' in awesome?"

"Er, yeah, sure, dawg. It's, er, da bomb!" The butler said, attempting to give Captain Falcon the peace symbol but getting it wrong. _I don't get paid enough for this job._

"Well, who is this letter from? Did I finally get accepted into So You Think You Can Dance?"

"Er, no, once again, you were so good they had to disqualify you. It's a letter from Super Smash Bros."

"Did they decide to change my final smash to 'Dance Groove'?"

"Er, no, you were so dazzling that you would blind the player. You're invited to the next Super Smash Bros. game."

"The next game, dude? You got to be kidd'n me!"

"No, I'm all to serious. Read the letter for yourself."

Captain Falcon grabbed the paper from his butler's hand. "This is uncool, dawg! I mean, I get to meet da groovy chicks and stuff, but this just aint cool, man! It's on with me and Master Hand! He's gonna get served!"

* * *

Link was a blur, slashing all of his dummies with his sword. Sweat trickled down his face, and his hair was wet. _Try to kidnap Zelda now, Ganondorf! You can't beat the toughest of the tough! _Thought Link, decapitating a dummy. He looked around. All of the dummies were lying on the ground, all of them with stuffing leaking out of them. He collapsed into a chair. The watch on his wrist was beeping; the training session was over.

He sat down for a couple more seconds, then decided to shower off. He walked into the bathroom, taking his shirt off. He suddenly gave a yelp. The postman was standing in front of the shower door, two letters in his hand.

"Nice abs." He commented, looking at Link's bare chest. "Anyways, you and a miss Zelda have a letter."

"Link? I hear noise from down there. Is everything okay?" Called the distant voice of Zelda, from upstairs. Link could hear feet coming down the steps; suddenly Zelda was there beside him, looking at the postman. "How did you get in?"

"Not important. What is important is that you two have just been invited to the next Super Smash Bros. game."

"WHAT?" Both Link and Zelda cried at once.

"That's right. Super Smash Bros. Fray. Master Hand wants you at Smash Mansion tomorrow at noon, sharp."

"Bu- but-" Link stammered. "I can't fit that into my schedule! That's too much work. It's insanity! I won't go! I refuse!"

"We have a contract." Zelda reminded Link, touching his shoulder gently. "We have to go. And besides, maybe it won't be as bad as you think it will be. You'll get to see Marth again, won't you?"

"I'd better get going." The postman said, snapping his fingers and disappearing. Link's jaw dropped open.

"-how?"

"Let's not question it." Said Zelda. "I'm going back upstairs. I want to finish the book I'm reading."

"…sure. I'll be down here, showering."

Zelda walked out, while Link turned the water on. _How will I survive making another game?_

* * *

"Are we there yet?"

"For the love of god, Nana, just a bit farther!"

The Ice Climbers jumped from rock to rock, the peak of the mountain within view.

"Hey Popo?"

"Yeah?"

"Are we there y- ouch!" Nana exclaimed, as Popo glared at her, having just hit her in the head with his hammer.

"You rotten ice climber! I'll show you!" Nana yowled, bowling her brother over. They wrestled on the floor until a voice above them said "Done yet?"

They both looked up. Pit was flying above them, a postman hat on his head. "When did you become a postman?" Popo asked, puzzled.

"I didn't" Pit grumbled. "The postman was sick today, so of _course_ Paultena wanted to lend him a hand and offer one of her servants to deliver the mail. Anyways, you have letters. Both of you."

Popo and Nana curiously grabbed the letters, and ripped them open.

"Super Sma-"

"I know." Said Pit grimly. "I got the letter too. Wait a second." He said, picking up his cell phone. "What is it Paultena? A surgeon at the hospital is sic- oh, no. I am not- oh, for the love of- fine, be there in a second." Pit shut his phone. "Gotta go and take a medical course. Bye." He flapped his wings and took off, leaving the Ice Climbers, bewildered, staring up into the sky.

* * *

"Sir, there is a problem in sector C. Will you check it out?"

"For the love of god, can't any of you fix it?"

"No, sir. It's that bad."

"Very well. Off with you now."

"Yes, sir."

A meta knight walked away, through the swinging doors that was the exit to Meta Knight's cabin in the Halberd. Meta Knight sat down, rubbing his head. "If I never have to see another puffball again, it'll be too soo-"

"Poyo!" A pink puffball had appeared at the swinging doors, bouncing in uninvited. Meta Knight wearily looked up and half heartedly raised his sword.

"What is it, Kirby?"

Instead of answering, Kirby bounced over to Meta Knight's fruit bowl and sucked up all of the apples.

"Kirby, you stinking puffball, stop eating my- hey that's my Best Supporting Actor Academy Award!" Meta Knight cried, as Kirby sucked up a trophy with a golden man on it. "Kirby-that's my son, dammit!" Meta Knight flew over to his medicine cabinet and took out a bottle.

"I knew this would come in handy some day." He muttered, pouring some into a glass. He turned back to Kirby. "Care for a glass of wine?"

"Poyo!" Cried a delighted Kirby, sucking up the whole glass. Suddenly he shuddered, and threw up the apples, academy award, son and glass.

"There. Better? Syrup of opium always does the trick for me." Meta Knight said, cleaning off his academy award. Kirby groaned as the postman appeared at the swinging doors.

"I have a letter for a Mr. Kirby and a Mr. Meta Knight."

"_Sir_ Meta Knight to you." Meta Knight said, turning to face the postman.

"Oh, sorry, _Sir_. I forgot for a second you were so stuck up."

"_What_ was that?"

"You heard me all too well."

"Meta Knight?" The same meta knight that had reported to Meta Knight previously was at the door.

"Meta Knight?" Meta Knight exclaimed, surprised.

"Postman?" Said the Meta Knight, looking at the postman.

"Meta Knight?" Said the postman, looking confused and swinging his head and looking at them both.

"Me?"

"Me?"

"Who?"

"Poyo!" Kirby said, jumping up.

"Anyways," The postman said, looking disturbed and having forgotten his and Meta Knight's past argument. "Here are your letters. Bye."

He threw the letters onto Meta Knight's table, and snapped his fingers, disappearing. Meta Knight, looking distracted, turned to his servant. "Yes, what is it?"

"Er, are you coming to sector C, or…"

"I'll be there in a second. Just need to read this." Meta Knight turned to the letters and threw Kirby's at the pink puffball. Kirby plopped down and ripped it open, taking out the letter and eating the envelope. He skimmed through the letter, and jumped up, looking excited. Meta Knight, having already read the letter, was staring at the wall blankly. Then he threw the letter at the wall, with such force that the wall crumpled onto him. Kirby bounced over and peered curiously into the rubble. Meta Knight got up, spitting.

"They can't do this! I can't spend another year at the smash mansion! I have a busy schedule!"

"Food?" Questioned Kirby.

"Yes, there will be food, Kirby, but…"

"Food!!" Kirby started jumping up and down. He grabbed a suitcase, and opened the emergency exit. He jumped out, yelling "Poyooooo!"

"Forgot the parachute." Muttered Meta Knight, sighing. "Oh, well, like it or not, I have to go…better start packing."

* * *

"Falco. Come _in, _Falco!"

"Right here, Foxy. I've locked onto our target."

"Better hurry." Came Krystal's voice from the transmitter. "I'm having trouble avoiding these lasers."

"Roger that."

Falco's arwing flew in front of Fox, shooting lasers and avoiding the enemy's. One hit their blaster, which flew off the ship. Fox did a dive to save it, leaning out the arwing window, and reaching out his paw. Two lasers from the enemy's ship last blaster almost hit it; Fox grabbed the blaster and pulled quickly back inside the arwing, right before two lasers hit air where his head had been a second ago. He pulled back up across from Krystal.

"Fox, what were you thinking? You could of got yourself killed! Then who would sign my paycheck?!" Krystal shouted into the transmitter.

"Sorry, seemed like to good of a blaster to go to waste. I'll see if Slippy can connect it onto one of our arwings."

Krystal rolled her eyes and advanced on the enemy's ship, shooting off the last blaster. It began to plummet to the ground, but Fox was already below it, and pulled the blaster into his ship.

"Great. Now I've got a double set."

"Sir, that also comes with a free engine." Falco said into the transmitter, shooting off the engine, which plummeted down to Fox's ship. The ship, meanwhile, lost power and crashed down onto a comet.

"Great work, Falco."

"A_hem!_"

"You too, Krystal."

"Er, Fox, don't order the party hats just yet. We've got company."

Fox looked up. Three more enemy ships were approaching them, shooting red lasers. Fox veered his arwing over to the left, avoiding a string of red ammunition. "Slippy, we need backup!" He shouted into a transmitter. He suddenly looked up due to tapping on his window. The postman, in a spacesuit, was floating outside his window, tapping on the glass.

"What are you doing!? Get out of here!" Fox shouted. Two lasers were shot at the postman, who snapped his fingers and disappeared, appearing on the other side of the window.

"You've got a letter." He mouthed, holding up three letters. Fox sighed rolled down his window, grabbed the letters, and rolled it back up again, flying away.

"I'll save these for later. Right now, I've got to kick some bad guy booty."

"Who are you talking to?" Falco questioned from the transmission.

"The reader, idiot! I'm closing the chapter with a lethal weapon line!"

"Doing a pretty sucky job at it."

"Any better ideas?"

"Yeah. Less talk. More butt-whoop'n!"

"Fine. You, reader." Said Fox, looking into the camera. "If you write a review, tell us who's line you like better. Whichever one of ours is voted best will get totally cocky about it in the next chapter. Toodle-oo!"


	2. The Welcoming

**Chapter 2**

Bustman: Hi! I'm back! And with another good, long chapter! And I want to thank you guys for your reviews; you have no idea how happy it makes me to know that people liked my story enough to take the time to review it. Anyways, before we get started, we have to take care of all the legal stuff. Today doing our disclaimer we have...Bowser!

Bowser: Bustman does not own anything besides the fic itself, okay?

Bustman: Thank you, Bowser.

Bowser: I'd rather be doing anything else in the world then talking to this guy...

Bustman: Up, up, up! Remember what I said about what happens when you make rude comments?

Bowser: (tears in eyes) Please don't burn my picture of me with Cinderella! I'm sorry!

Bustman: Good koopa. Remember, if you have any ideas about who might be funny doing the disclaimer, tell me in a review. Enjoy the story!

* * *

Master Hand drummed his fingers on the podium, looking across the smash hall. It was 11:50, and none of the smashers had come yet. He already had the newcomers behind the stage; he had made them come early. However, the hall was bare of any people. Master Hand had thought that some might come a bit early. He sighed.

As if on cue, the doors leading into the smash hall swung open, and Meta Knight strode towards Master Hand, his footsteps echoing in the large hallway.

"Master Hand, I am strictly opposed to-"

"Poyooooo!"

Kirby, a suitcase in hand, had fallen through the roof of the smash hall, and landed on Meta Knight, who was now gasping for breath. Kirby had already gotten up and was curiously looking around. "Food?"

"There will be food after the introduction, which will take place after all the smashers get here. Crazy, will you get Kirby's bag?"

"I sure will!" Crazy said, cackling wildly. His fingers maniacally moved around as he approached Kirby's bag and scooped it up. He suddenly dropped to the floor, under the weight of Kirby's bag. "Kirby, what did you put in here?"

Kirby bounced over and opened the bag. Mountains of silverware and napkins fell out, some kind of eating utensils that Master Hand had never seen before.

"Kirby, you do know we have silverware _here_, don't you?"

Kirby shrugged, while Crazy Hand stuffed the silverware back in the bag and hauled it across the hall, grunting with effort.

"Oh, and by the way, Crazy, Kirby's room is on the top floor."

"Oh, for the love of socks!"

Crazy Hand continued to grumble as he entered the stairwell. Kirby walked over to the row of chairs Master Hand had put out and plopped down into one. Meta Knight, who had regained his breath, walked over to his chair. He sat down, but immediately after doing so, the chair snapped together, squeezing Meta Knight between the back and the seat.

"Oops. That must be the dysfunctional chair." Master Hand apologized as Meta Knight screamed in pain and tried to get it off. He blindly stumbled into a bookcase, which fell on top of him. Meta Knight did not emerge.

Crazy Hand emerged from the stairwell, and floated up to Master Hand. "Today's payday."

Master Hand sighed, reached into the podium and pulled out some dirty underwear. Crazy grabbed it, laughed maniacally, and floated over to the corner, muttering "My Precious…"

Soon other smashers began to pile into the hall. Mario and Luigi were the first after Kirby and Meta Knight to arrive. Luigi was excitedly dragging Mario into the smash hall, who grumbled and cursed. Luigi sat down next to Kirby, while Mario sat a good two rows away from them. Luigi and Kirby had immediately become the best of friends, sharing their enthusiasm for the new game.

"…And I'm going to show the world a whole new fighting style, called the 'Luigi Driller', and it's going to suck the opponents into a huge whirlwind, and I know this is going to be my big shot, and I'm going to get tons of fans, _twice_ as many as Mario, and I'm just so glad to be here, aren't you?"

Kirby happily nodded, already wearing a bib and holding a fork and a knife. "Food good!"

"Yes, I just _love_ the food as well! The other day I was eating this taco…"

Mario rolled his eyes as Luigi shared stories with Kirby, who seemed to be intrigued by them.

Next to arrive was Pit, who sat down next to Mario after shooting a menacing glare at Master Hand. "Bit bored?" He asked turning to Mario.

"Yeah…" Mario sighed.

Bowser was next. "Fear me smashers!" He roared. "For I am the greatest opponent you'll ever face, brave, afraid of nothing!"

"Boo."

Bowser gave out a girl-like scream and jumped into Mario's arms. Samus' corners of her mouth turned up a bit, although it was obvious she was in a fierce temper. She sat down in the back, taking out a toothpick and putting it in her mouth. She glared at Master Hand, never taking her eyes off him. Master Hand uneasily drummed his fingers on the podium again. He had hoped this would be easy, but from the looks of all the glares that were being shot at him it wouldn't.

Next came in Yoshi, who made a new hole in the roof as he fell through, a defective parachute on his back.

"Out of the waaaaaaaay!" He yelled, as he fell toward Pit. Pit simply leaned back, and let Yoshi fall in front of him.

"Y'know, you could have outstretched your arms and saved him," whispered Mario.

Pit shrugged. "This is my day off."

After Yoshi, Captain Falcon made a big entrance. He swung the door open, and snapped his fingers. Music started to play, and his butler, from the broken roof, sighed and lowered down a disco ball. Captain Falcon started to disco, and then jumped on stage in front of Master Hand. "Are you ready, smashers!?"

A cricket chirped from outside.

"Then prepare to have your brains blown!" Captain Falcon shouted. He did a stage dive. However, nobody caught him, and he landed on the floor in front of Pit. When everybody looked at him, he shrugged. "Again, my day off."

Peach and Zelda came in next, followed by Link, who had apparently forgotten he was on bodyguard duty and was talking to Marth. Donkey Kong and Diddy Kong came in next. Diddy Kong looked up at the disco ball, and then at the toppled over bookcase, the cowering Bowser, and the unconscious Yoshi and Captain Falcon. "Hey, did I miss something or what?"

The Pokemon Trainer came in next, followed by Pikachu, Jigglypuff and Lucario. The Pokemon Trainer cringed at the sight of all the smashers. "Wow, I haven't seen any of these pokemon before! I'll capture one and bring it pack to Professor Oak! Go, Squirtle!"

Squirtle emerged from the pokeball and looked wildly around.

"Squirtle, use Water Gun on the big ugly turtle!"

"No, Red, I'm Bowser, remember? We made a videogame together! Wait, no, call off Sq-aaaaahhhhh!"

Squirtle used Water Gun on Bowser, who fell to the floor.

"Go, Poke Ball!" Shouted Red, throwing a red and white device. It hit Bowser in the head while he was getting up, and he fell onto the floor again on his shell, and struggled to get up again. He burst out in tears. "Why? Why always me?"

"You think _you_ have it bad." muttered Meta Knight, who had just crawled out from under the bookcase. At that moment Sonic dashed into the room, trampling Meta Knight. He got uneasily to his feet. "Well, at least that's ove-"

KAPOW!

Two arwings bowled Meta Knight over, who began weeping with Bowser. Fox and Falco got out of them, looking around.

"You're late." Master Hand commented.

"I told you we should have taken the Ferrari!" Falco said. "And you know what? That's not the only thing lately you've been wrong about. You thought people would actually _like_ your lame catchphrase, didn't you? _Ha!_ Not _one_ person said they liked yours more then mine!"

"I-"

"Go on, admit it. Admit that mine was better!"

"Fal-"

"The readers think-"

"Falco, there were'nt that many reviews!

"Ah, but Bustman did some asking around. Two _more_ people said they liked mine better! That puts the score to 4-0!"

Fox was about to angrily say something, but Master Hand interrupted. "Excuse me, but Bustman doesn't want us breaking the fourth wall."

"Right." Said Fox sheepishly. He walked over to the chairs. Falco followed, still grinning.

Soon most of the smashers had arrived, except for…

"The Evil Villains Union. E.V.U. for short." Said a dark haired, stout lawyer with glasses. Behind him were Ganondorf, Wario, Wolf, and King DeDeDe. They had just approached Master Hand, and were all glaring at him. "I am their lawyer, and we are refusing to join this new game of yours."

Master Hand sighed. "We have a contract with them. They signed it themselves."

"The contract specifically states that Super Smash Bros. will not have its characters do another any Super Smash Bros. games within a year of one another. It has only been 193 days."

"Yes, but…" Master Hand calmly said. "It also says, at the end of the contract, this, in quote. 'In the special case of an early release of the _you-know-what_, Super Smash Bros. has the right to bring all characters back for another game."

Yowls of outrage emerged from the smashers at this.

"The end of the contract!?"

"No one reads that!"

"They're so bored by then they just skim it!"

"I read the end of the contract!"

Everybody glared at Luigi, who was waving his hand up in the air. He uneasily looked around and lowered it. "I mean, er… that's not fair?"

More yowls of outrage emerged. Master Hand had to raise his voice. "I WILL HAVE SILENCE IN MY HALL!"

Everybody went silent. Master Hand turned back to the lawyer, who was uneasily reading the end of the contract. "Now, I think you should go."

The lawyer glared at Master Hand, turned heel, and then walked out of the hall. The E.V.U. shot Master Hand one last angry look and then sat down.

"Welcome, smashers." Master Hand said in a booming voice. "Welcome back to Smash Mansion!"

"And happy Sock Appreciation Day!" called out Crazy, who was wearing a different sock on each finger.

"Er…yes. Happy Sock Appreciation Day. Anyways, you're probably wondering _why_ we are creating another video game so soon. I am sorry to tell you this, but that is classified information."

The smashers howled indignantly, many of them getting to their feet.

"I am sorry." Master Hand repeated. "I am sure you all have busy schedules. But this doesn't have to be a bad experience; it only is if you want it to be."

"I don't want it to be! I personally had a great time working on the last game!"

"Thank you, Luigi. And you too, Kirby." said Master Hand, resting his gaze fondly on the two smashers. "Anyways, I want to repeat to you the rules. Number On- yes, what is it, Falco?"

"How many people here like the phrase 'Less talk, more butt whoop'n.' more then 'Right now I have to kick some bad guy booty.'"

All of the smashers hands went up except for Fox, who had his arms folded and was grumbling unhappily.

"Ha! That makes it 41-0, Fox!"

"As I was saying…" said Master Hand sternly. "No fights except for when you enter the pain simulator. You may not switch rooms or roommates with other people."

"Who are our roommates?" Olimar called out.

"I will put the list up tonight on the billboard in the hall." Master Hand said. "If you have any complaints, come to me or Crazy."

"There's going to be a long line." Ike whispered to Pit, who snickered.

"… and boys must be out of girl's rooms by 9:00, and vice versa." Master Hand finished. "And now I have the pleasure of introducing our new smashers!"

Nobody clapped except Luigi and Kirby, who slowly came to a stop as they realized everyone was glaring at them.

"First, yet another duo here in Smash Mansion, Baby Mario and Luigi!" Two babies, one dressed in red and one dressed in green, crawled out onto the stage. Mario and Luigi's eyes widened in surprise.

"-how?"

"Next, the second koopa in the house, Bowser Jr.!" A child who looked a lot like a young Bowser got up on stage. Only Luigi, Kirby, and Bowser hesitantly clapped.

"Third, the ultimate sports player who is getting his big break in Super Smash Bros. Fray! I give you Waluigi!" A tall, extremely skinny and mean-looking man got up on stage, a tennis racket in his hand.

"Boo! You suck!"

Waluigi threw a tennis ball at Luigi, which hit him right in the nose. Luigi fell over unconscious.

"Fourth, another chimp! I give you Dixie Kong!"

Dixie Kong raced up on stage, waving. Most of the crowd clapped. The female chimp had visited Diddy Kong in the smash mansion while they were making Brawl, and the likeable chimp had become popular among the smashers.

"Fifth, the scaly villain from Donkey Kong, King K. Rool!" A lizard like creature with a crown on his head got up on stage, waving. The clapping abruptly stopped.

"Sixth, yet _another _duo here in Smash Mansion, Minun and Plusle!" Two bunny pokemon got up on stage, smiling. Pikachu looked shocked. _He_ was supposed to be the cute electric pokemon!

"Next, the talking pokemon that we all know and love, Meowth!" A persian-like cat got on stage, grinning and waving.

"Hiya, how are ya?"

"Eighth, the bounty hunter rival to Captain Falcon, Samurai Goroh!" A round, mean-looking man got up on stage.

"I'll kill ya, Falcon!" He growled, pointing his katana in Captain Falcon's direction. Captain Falcon stared confidently back at him.

"I'm not afraid of you! I've got the power of music on my side!"

CRASH!

"Oops." Said Falcon's butler, who had been holding up the disco ball and had accidentally dropped it Captain Falcon's head.

Master Hand brought out Leon Powalski, Krystal, Louie, Balloon Fighter, Isaac, Shadow, and Lyndis as the time passed.

"…and last, but not least, K.K. Slider!" Murmurs of uneasiness arose as the white dog with a guitar got out on stage. Wolf stood up and openly opposed Master Hand. "Is this some sort of joke? He's not a fighter! He's from the most non-violent series there is, Animal Crossing! He won't be a worthy opponent to anyone here!"

"Oh yeah?" K.K. challenged, hitting a C chord. "See for yourself, then."

Wolf got up and walked up to him, jeering. Master Hand glanced over at his brother.

"Ready the pain simulator, Crazy."

Giving a wild laugh, Crazy went over to four machines and flipped the switch on two of them. K.K. and Wolf walked into them.

"And here we go!"

Wolf and K.K. evaporated, appearing on a big screen behind Master Hand so the smashers could watch the battle.

Wolf judged his opponent. K.K. was leaning to the left, so Wolf would aim right and throw off his balance. He charged, but K.K. was ready. He swung his guitar and hit Wolf square in the face. Wolf staggered backwards. K.K. began to charge up a smash attack, but Wolf got a hold of himself, grabbed K.K.'s guitar and flipped him over. He then prepared to grab K.K., but K.K. tripped him with his paw as he got up. Wolf, lying on the ground, did his Wolf Dash, and slid across the stage, throwing K.K. upwards. Wolf turned around, only to be hit on the head by K.K.'s guitar, which was aimed downwards as he fell through the air. K.K. then flicked his paw at Wolf's stomach, sending him flying upwards. K.K. did an incredible jump to Wolf's level and slammed him down to the ground. Wolf was sent flying, but he wasn't quite finished yet. He recovered using Fire Wolf, hitting K.K. who was on the edge of the stage and unprepared. He then grabbed K.K. and threw him, sending a blaster after him. K.K. fell to the ground and saw Wolf approaching. He grabbed his guitar and tripped him, getting up. In the second Wolf was on the ground, K.K. began to play K.K. Sleep. Wolf's eyes began to droop, and suddenly he was asleep.

He opened his eyes two seconds later, and saw K.K. charging up a smash attack.

_Oh, shoot…_

KAPOW!

"GAME!"

K.K. and Wolf re-emerged from the pain simulator. K.K. held out his paw, but Wolf just grunted rudely and sat down. Master Hand looked amused.

"Is that all? Splendid. I bid you all good day."

* * *

Bustman: So, what'd you think? I don't think it's as good as the first chapter, but you can decide that for yourself. If you have any ideas about who might be funny as roommates, please tell me; I haven't decided most of them. Please, _please_ review! And thanks for taking the time to read my story! Bye!


	3. Settling In

**Chapter 3**

Bustman: Hey, I'm back!

Kirby: Poyo!

Bustman: So, thank you for the generous reviews. One more and we'll be in double digits!

Kirby: (holds up all his fingers) Ten!

Bustman: So Kirby, the disclaimer!

Kirby: Poyo poy, poy poyo, nika poyo poy!

Bustman: ...great. Anyways, I don't own anything related to Super Smash Bros. except for a copy of the game.

Kirby: (bobs his head happily)

Bustman: Enjoy the story!

* * *

All the smashers, still discussing Wolf and K.K.'s battle, piled into the dining hall. Luigi, Kirby, Bowser, Meta Knight, Link, Marth, Mario and Pit all plopped down at the end of the table together. Jigglypuff, Zelda and Peach sat down across from them.

"Amazing battle, huh?" Luigi asked Kirby, getting a chicken leg and taking a huge bite out of it. "I mean, I thought Wolf had K.K. for sure after that amazing throw, but that K.K. has got good aim. Y'know…"

Luigi continued talking to Kirby while Kirby, not really listening, sucked up almost half the food on their side of the table. K.K. walked up to them, a lunch tray in hand. He nodded to the spot between Mario and Luigi. "That seat available?"

"No."

"Yes."

The two brothers stared at eachother, Luigi puzzled, Mario defiant. Luigi shrugged and then told K.K. "No one's sitting there, as far as my knowledge goes."

"Yes," Mario interrupted. "But we aren't willing to share it with newbies who think they can just walk in here and beat all of the senior smashers. This is our turf!"

"Well, it's mine too, now." K.K. said coolly. Luigi looked horrified.

"Mario, how could you say such a nasty thing? All new smashers should be welcomed. Right, Kirby?"

Kirby shrugged, gravy splattered all over his face as he licked the remainders of his mashed potatoes off his plate. Luigi shot one last angry look at Mario, and then got up. "Y'know, I think I'm going to find somewhere else to sit. Come on, Kirby."

Kirby looked at the table. All the food was gone. He looked at the other side. Still plenty there. Kirby jumped up and followed Luigi and K.K.. Jigglypuff uneasily looked at the others, then got up and followed them. Mario took an angry bite out of his ribs. "Fools."

"Y'know, it isn't the new smashers' fault that Master Hand called for another game. I think you're just angry about the whole situation, and taking it out on them." Zelda said, irritated. "You should show some respect, especially for your brother."

Mario shot an angry look at Zelda. She had read him like a book, but he wasn't about to admit it. He got up, slamming his ribs down on the table. "Bathroom." he muttered, walking away. Zelda and Peach shared an exasperated look.

"Excuse me." xaid Bowser, glancing over at the E.V.U.. They were talking to Waluigi, Bowser Jr., Leon Powalski, King K. Rool and Samurai Goroh, holding up a contract. Bowser uneasily walked up to them. "Hey guys. What's going on?" he asked, as casually as he could.

Ganondorf glared at him. "Recruiting new members. Get out of here; your bad breath is making it hard to concentrate."

Bowser shrugged. "Any chance I could, I don't know…be recruited?"

"No." said Ganondorf flatly.

"Aw, come on! You're letting my son join!"

"Bowser, what's our union called?"

"The E.V.U."

"And what does the E stand for?"

Bowser scratched his head. "Evil?"

"Exactly. See, Bowser, here's the problem…you're not evil. You're a little girl in a monster's body."

"That's not true!" Bowser said, swinging his head wildly. "Look-" He ran over to Ness and spilled Lucas' seltzer water in his orange juice. "Ha! I ruined your drink!"

"Wow, orange soda! They were out at the soda machine! Thanks, Bowser, you're a true pal."

Bowser looked crestfallen. "But-but…"

King Dedede glared at Bowser. "Right. Real scary. Get out."

Bowser walked back over to his table, tail drooping. Link sympathetically patted his back. "It's okay, dude. You've got us."

"Yeah," Marth added in. "We're kind people."

As if on cue, Yoshi, who had been walking along the balcony to complain to Master Hand that he had found a hair in his soup, lost his balance and fell over the railing into Pit's mashed potatoes.

"You stupid dinosaur!" Pit shouted. "You're mine!" Pit split his bow into two sharp blades. Yoshi, with food splattered all over his face, screamed and ran away. Pokemon Trainer spotted him.

"Look, Pikachu, it's a Treecko! Let's catch it!"

Pikachu shook his head and took a sip of coffee.

"Go, Charizard!" Red sent out an orange, dragon like creature. It spit out fire. Yoshi got down on his knees and groveled at Red's feet.

"Please have mercy! I have a wife and three kids!" sobbed Yoshi, grabbing hold of Red's jacket and pulling him closer.

"This pokemon can speak! He must be a part of Team Rocket! Charizard, use Flamethrower!"

"No, please! No- ahhhhhhh!" Yoshi screamed, as he was burnt by flamethrower. Pit, meanwhile, dived into the flames and started to beat up Yoshi.

"Why's everyone so down?" Captain Falcon asked, striding into the scene. "Y'know what will make everyone happy again? Some rock'n dance moves!"

All of the smashers within earshot screamed, grabbed their chairs and started beating up Captain Falcon.

"Everybody, stop!!"

All the smashers froze and looked at Captain Olimar, who was in the doorway. He cleared his throat.

"The roommates list is in!"

Everybody ran past Olimar, trampling him. Olimar got up, only to be bulldozed back over by Sonic. "Why always me!?"

"Join the club." grumbled Meta Knight, passing by with Bowser. A chandelier fell on top of them, and then caught fire. Olimar slowly backed away, whistling.

Mario looked at the list, studying each pair or occasional threesome. Master Hand sure knew how to make the smashers happy- well, at least most of them.

**Mario-Pit**

** K.K. Slider-Captain Falcon**

** Snake-Donkey Kong**

** Dixie Kong-Nana**

** Toon Link-Popo**

** Bowser-Meta Knight**

** Yoshi-Pokemon Trainer**

** King DeDeDe-Waluigi**

** Wario-Samurai Goroh**

** Krystal-Samus**

** Pikachu-Minun**

** Ganondorf-Lucario**

** Mr. Game & Watch-R.O.B.**

** Baby Mario-Baby Luigi**

** Diddy Kong-Bowser Jr.**

** Louie-Sonic**

** Wolf-Shadow**

** Fox-Falco**

** Isaac-Balloon Fighter**

** Jigglypuff-Plusle**

** Meowth-Lucas**

** Ness-Olimar**

** King K. Rool-Leon Powalski**

** Luigi-Kirby**

** Peach-Zelda-Lyndis**

** Link-Marth-Ike**

Most of the smashers seemed content with their roommates. Link, Ike, and Marth high-fived each other, and Luigi and Kirby were doing a little dance together. Yoshi, however groaned. "I have to put up with Red every single day?"

"Apparently so," said Shadow coolly, walking past. Wolf held out his paw for a high five; Shadow grabbed his hand and twisted it, then walked away, leaving Wolf silently screaming in pain.

K.K., Captain Falcon, Kirby, Luigi, Bowser and Meta Knight walked up the stairs together. Captain Falcon was talking business with the white dog.

"…So there would be total darkness, and then suddenly the crowd hears your guitar. You pluck a D note, and then there's a brilliant burst of light, and I emerge from the fog, dancing…"

"I think the crowd would be happier if I urinated on them." K.K. muttered, looking at Captain Falcon's bruises and cuts.

"Or a tornado struck them all dead." Luigi said under his breath. K.K. grinned, and then stopped abruptly. "Well, this is it. Our room. Number 102."

Captain Falcon heard a large explosion go off in the other room. "Let me guess-"

"Snake and Donkey Kong." K.K. sighed. He went to the left wall of the room and threw a shoe at it.

_Meanwhile, in Donkey Kong and Snake's Room_

Donkey Kong, having just been burnt after setting off one of Snake's explosives with a banana peel, lay on his bed and sighed. Suddenly the wall shook, and one of the books on the bookshelf above him fell to the ground, right on a small, beeping device.

"Oh, no…" Donkey Kong muttered.

KABLAM!

* * *

Bowser and Meta Knight walked to the end of the corridor in silence. "Well, this is it." Meta Knight said uneasily. "Now let's just hope that our bad luck doesn't combine and-"

BOOM!

A wrecking ball crushed the room right before they went in. They looked out at the gaping hole and saw Funky Kong outside directing the wrecking ball. "Sorry, guys!"

"Great." Meta Knight muttered. "What's Master Hand going to think?"

"I think…" said Master Hand from behind them. "That you two are going to have to spend a day in the Smash Chamber."

* * *

Krystal and Samus glared at each other as they walked into their room.

"What're you looking at?" spat Krystal, throwing her bags on her bed with such force that they bounced towards Samus with incredible speed.

"You're ugly face." Samus spat back, catching a bag in each hand without even looking up.

"If you want to see something ugly, look in a mirror sometime!"

"I don't have to. I'm looking at the prize pig in ugliness right now."

"Alright, look." Krystal said through gritted teeth, grabbing her staff and slicing it through the rug in the center of the room. "This is my side, and this is yours."

"Alright, Blue-Face."

"Dumb Blonde."

"Ugly-Snout."

"Stupid-head."

Samus and Krystal were face to face now, fuming. Suddenly, they both broke out laughing.

"I don't believe we've formally met." grinned Samus, reaching out her hand. "The name's Samus."

"Krystal here." Krystal said, taking her hand and shaking it. "I think we're going to become close, don't you?"

"Definitely."

* * *

Ganondorf gritted his teeth as he placed his bag down. _I'd rather be rooming with anyone but this guy._

"_Me too._"

"Hey." said Ganondorf. "Stop reading my mind!"

"_We're roommates now. We have no secrets_."

_I'm going to murder that dog._

"_No, you aren't."_

"Shut up!" shouted Ganondorf, exasperated. _Idiot_.

"_I hope you were referring to yourself._"

"Gah!!" shouted Ganondorf, jumping towards Lucario, who was already a good ten feet away.

"_You take to long to aim_."

Ganondorf, face red with fury, sat down on his bed. Lucario floated over near the door.

"_Yes, come in_."

The door swung open, and Luigi walked in. "You guys, Master Hand called a meeting. Everyone's heading downstairs."

"_Be there in a second_."

Lucario floated out of the room. "_Ganondorf, you are not throwing my luggage out the window._"

Ganondorf winced, sighed, and followed Lucario.

The smash hall was full of smashers, chatting amongst themselves. Master Hand floated up to the podium. "Smashers, I have two duties to perform tonight."

Everyone went silent.

"First, I want to introduce our staff here at Smash Mansion. You're counselors here will be Cranky Kong and Mewtwo."

Dixie Kong, Donkey Kong and Diddy Kong groaned.

"Lead of construction will be Funky Kong…"

Dixie, DK and Diddy groaned again.

"…and making and serving lunch will be Tom Nook and Amy Rose."

Sonic groaned this time as Amy got on her tippy-toes and waved to Sonic.

"In the medical department will be Dr. Mario, and Daisy will be in the nursery."

Murmurs of approval rang out from the crowd.

"Now, for my last duty-"

"Is it to get this guy some deodorant?" Falco said, pointing over to Fox. "Cause if it is, you have my deepest gratitude…"

"As I was _saying_…" Master Hand said, patience thinning. "One last duty. Us smashers are going to go on a vacation to the mountains to ski and snowboard tomorrow, so you'd better pack!"

Murmurs of interest came from the smashers.

"I could find something fun in that." Popo muttered to Toon Link.

"A vacation before we even start the game…" Shadow murmured, half to himself. "I like the way things roll around here."

"Hey Ganon," Yoshi muttered. "Can I come to your room to pack? Red insists that I do a bullet seed; I surrendered and told him I would be his pokemon."

"Er, no thanks." Ganon muttered. _Little does he know I shall be having a tea party with Mr. Fluffums._

"_Mr. Fluffums_?" Lucario asked, grinning. _"Can I join?"_

Master Hand looked at the crowd of smashers. Their anger seemed to be ebbing, and they seemed to be getting along. He hoped it would stay that way.

_Meanwhile…_

Meta Knight and Bowser were being hung by their thumbs in a rundown dungeon. Crazy Hand cackled, whipping them.

"Scream louder! Writhe in pain!"

"Why, why?" Bowser sobbed.

"Because I'm being paid ten bucks an hour to do this!" Crazy laughed maniacally.

"We'll double that!" Meta gasped. "Just let us out of here!"

Crazy Hand pondered this. "But then I don't get to hear your screams of pain. No, thank you." He continued whipping them. "Anyways, Bustman sincerely hopes you enjoed this chapter, and tells you to review. Toodles!"


	4. Chaos Above Ground

**Chapter 4**

Bustman: Hello, and thank you for your wonderful reviews! We are now in double digits!

(Confetti falls down from a party ball; Yoshi, who had lifted up the party ball from a balcony above Bustman, loses his balance and falls over the balcony next to him.)

Bustman: Hiya, Yoshi. While you're here and in great pain I imagine, why don't you do the disclaimer?

Yoshi: (Spits out two teeth and his ribs.)

Bustman: Stop messing around, Yoshi, we have business to take care of.

Yoshi: (Groggily, after swallowing back down his ribs) Bustman does not own anything except the fic itself.

Bustman: Thank you, Yoshi.

Yoshi: Are you giving us health insurance?

Bustman: (Bursts out laughing and wipes a tear away from his eye) Ah, Yoshi, m'boy, I hurt you smashers so often to keep the readers entertained that I'd have to be the Queen of England to give you health insurance. However, you do have a dental plan. Make good use of it. Anyways, enjoy the story.

* * *

Master Hand read Star magazine uneasily, not able to concentrate. He finally slapped it shut in frustration.

"Ooh, it's their thousandth edition. Ought to have pretty good dirt in there." Crazy whistled, looking at the cover. He turned to a flight attendant that was passing. "Excuse me, my crab-apple juice has a hair in it."

"I'm sorry, sir. May I get you another?" she said tiredly.

"No, I've lost my appetite for it now. Get me some rotten tomato juice."

The flight attendant raised her eyebrows. "Sir, ordering crab-apple juice is one thing, but I don't believe we have rotten tomato juice."

"I thought this was supposed to be first class! I'm never flying this airline again!"

The flight attendant sighed. "I'll see what I can do, sir."

"Ask the pilot if I can ride in the cockpit!" Crazy called after her. He turned to Master Hand. "You reading that?" he asked, pointing to the thousandth edition special.

"No," Master Hand said as Crazy greedily grabbed it. "But Crazy, do you think it was a bad idea to leave the smashers in the back of the plane while we ride first class?"

"What? Um, no…" Crazy said, absorbed in the magazine. Master Hand sighed and stared out the window.

_I have a bad feeling about this…_

* * *

Captain Falcon was reading Star magazine in the back. "Hey K.K., want to read some? It's the one thousandth edition."

K.K. plucked a string on his guitar. "Nah, I'm not into those types of magazines that intrude on star's lives. They're people just like us." Captain Falcon stared at him. K.K. sighed. "People, dog, whatever."

Captain Falcon stared back down at the magazine. "Man, I'd like to go out with so many of these stars. If only I could meet them…"

Leon Powalski snorted from across the aisle. "Like they'd go out with you if you'd ask."

"Hey, dawg, I'm a woman magnet." He secretly pushed the 'Help' button on his arm hold. A young, female flight attendant ran over to him.

"See?" Captain Falcon said, smirking.

"What's the problem, sir?" The flight attendant asked anxiously.

"The problem is, madam, that I'm irresistibly attracted to you." Captain Falcon said, putting one of his muscular arms on his armrest. The flight attendant rolled her eyes.

"Is there any _real_ problem, sir? Are you thirsty? Are you hot?"

"No, but you are." Captain Falcon said, putting his arm around her. She slapped it.

"Are you flirting with me?"

"Depends. Is it working?"

KAPOW!

"Is that a satisfactory answer?" the flight attendant asked sweetly, having just given Captain Falcon a black eye. "Yes? Great. Call me if you need anything _else_." She walked away.

"She loves me. I can see it in her eyes." Captain Falcon whispered over to Leon, who rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, I bet she loves you as much as us smashers love your dancing, Falcon."

All of the smashers that had heard Captain Falcon and dancing in the same sentence screamed and pushed the 'Help' button frantically.

"Well," said Bowser, from two rows behind Captain Falcon. "It looks like our bad luck is rubbing off on Captain Falcon."

"Oh, dear, knock on wood." Lyndis muttered across the row from them.

"Attention, passangers." said someone in the cockpit from the intercom. "Some bad turbulance is coming up, so bad that we need two passangers picked at random to sacrifice their lives and get off the plane so it will be light enough to make it through. And it looks as if those two random passengers are… Bowser and Meta Knight! Toodles!"

The floor opened from beneath Meta Knight and Bowser and they fell out of the plane, screaming.

_Meanwhile, in the cockpit…_

"Er, you know, Crazy, we didn't need to sacrifice two living beings lives to make it through the storm…" The pilot said to Crazy Hand, scratching his head.

"You said I could do any one thing I wanted on the dashboard as long as it didn't involve crashing the plane." Crazy Hand said stubbornly. "And besides, there's no use crying over spilled milk."

_Back in the back…_

"Ouch, they have a long way to fall." Luigi said, looking out the window into the grand canyon below the plane. "Ah, well. Got any sevens?"

Kirby shook his head. From behind them, Lucario said "_Yes, he does. And Ganondorf, I acknowledge your favorite movie is High School Musical._"

"Shut up!" said Ganondorf behind them. Luigi rolled his eyes and held his hand out in front of Kirby. Kirby sighed and spit up a seven.

"Hmmm…" Red said, rubbing his chin and staring at Kirby. "Eats anything, very round…must be a Munchlax!"

Kirby's eyes widened, and he ducked just as Red threw a pokeball at him It hit Luigi in the head, and he fell unconscious.

"Hmm. I must need to weaken it first." Red though aloud, grabbing the second pokeball on his belt. "Go, Ivysaur!"

Ivysaur jumped out of his pokeball, right on Pikachu's lap. The air was knocked out of him, and his Star magazine fell out the window.

"Nooooo!" Pikachu cried. "That was the thousandth edition!"

_Meanwhile, below the plane…_

"Well, Bowser, I'm glad we were able to hang from the plane's wheels." Meta Knight said happily, hanging onto the bar that connected the wheels of the plane.

"Me too." Bowser said. "It seems like our luck isn't that bad after all."

A magazine then hit Bowser in the hand, and he let go in surprise. He grabbed Meta Knight's cape.

"Bowser, let go! Or else I'll fall to my death too!"

"I don't wanna! I'm scared!" said Bowser, weeping.

"Bowser-ahhhhh!" Meta Knight screamed, losing his grip. They both plummeted down.

"And I'd never gotten to read the thousandth edition of Star!" Bowser sobbed as he plummeted through the air.

Meta Knight rolled his eyes. "This is going to be a looooong death."

* * *

"Ivysaur, use Bullet Seed!"

Ivysaur used Bullet Seed across the aisle. Kirby ducked again, and the seeds fell out the window. Kirby pressed the 'Help' button. A young flight attendant appeared. "Yes, what can I do to- oh my!" She screamed as Ivysaur's string of seeds hit her. She lost her balance and fell out the window.

"Don't worry, young lady! I'll help you!" Captain Falcon shouted, jumping out the window. K.K. rolled his eyes and grabbed his hand.

"Falcon, are you trying to get yourself killed?"

"No, just trying to get a hot date. Ah, well." Captain Falcon sighed as K.K. hoisted him back in.

Meanwhile, Kirby had swung his hammer across the aisle out towards Ivysaur. He collapsed and did not get up.

"Ivysaur, return!" Red shouted, not at all traumatized that his pokemon had just killed a woman. "I'll use my new pokemon! Go, Yoshimon!"

Yoshi sighed, slammed his book down, and walked over to Red from two aisles behind him. "Yoshi, yosh." He said flatly.

"Yoshimon, use egg attack!"

"Which one?"

"Silly Yoshimon! Pokemon don't talk!" Red said. "Now, use egg attack or you'll go the same way as that flight attendant."

Yoshi quickly got out an egg and threw it at Kirby, who sucked it up and turned into… Yoshi Kirby!

"Yoshi!" Kirby cried, as he extended his long, red tongue. Yoshi quickly sidestepped, and the tongue slapped Pikachu in the face.

Yoshi quickly used his Yoshi Bomb, but Kirby was ready. He extended his hammer and hit Yoshi full in the face. Yoshi skidded away, holding his nose.

"Oh, boy! Is it Beat Up People For No Particular Reason Day?" Samus asked, charging her arm cannon. She blasted out a missle; both Kirby and Yoshi jumped out of the way. The missle hit the floor and exploded, creating a huge hole in the center of the aisle. All smashers nearby had to hold onto their chairs not be sucked into it. Samus did a rapid fire, and all the windows nearby were cracked open.

_Meanwhile, back in the cockpit…_

Crazy and the pilot felt a violent jerk on the plane, and then the sound of windows cracking. The plane, now unstable, started to lower down.

"Oh, butter biscuits!" The pilot shouted. "The plane's going to crash!" He blushed as Crazy, puzzled, stared at him. "What? We aren't allowed to curse on the plane. Bad example for the little tots who ask to come to the cockpit. Anyways, will you go check what's going on?"

Crazy floated out of the cockpit. When he passed by Master Hand, he whispered, "Some people get so worked up over nothing. He says the plane's about to crash."

"WHAT!!" shouted Master Hand. "Crazy, you do realize we're all about to die?"

"What? Oh," said Crazy Hand, who had just picked back up Star. "I thought he meant crash a party or something. Oh, well, nice knowing you. Toodles!"

Crazy Hand floated through the curtains that separated first class from the rest of the plane. He saw Yoshi and Kirby sparring with each other, Samus shooting missles at Captain Falcon, K.K. playing dramatic music, the hole in the middle of the aisle, the empty seats where Meta Knight and Bowser had once been, the cracked windows, Pikachu frantically asking passengers if they had an edition of Star magazine to spare, and all the smashers hanging on for dear life. He floated back to the cockpit.

"Sir, everything seems fine to me back there," Crazy reported seriously.

"Ugh, very well. We'll have to make an emergency landing." said the pilot. He veered the wheels upwards suddenly. Many of the passengers that were standing up slid to the back of the plane.

"Whee!" Crazy yelled, as he collided with the wall of the cockpit. "Hey, what are you doing?"

"Trying to even out the plane!" The pilot yelled. "But the controls are now hard to, well, control!"

"I've got it!" Crazy Hand said suddenly, snapping his fingers. "We all turn into unicorns and fly away!" The pilot stared at him. He shrugged. "Or we could get half of the passengers to come here, to the front, and get half of them to go to the back. That way the plane will even out."

The pilot grinned. "Crazy, that's genius!" He spoke into the intercom. "Passengers, I have an urgent request. In order to land safely, I need half of you to come here, to the cockpit. The other half needs to go all the way to the back. If you don't, your lives will be gruesomely taken away from you."

"And why should we?!" yelled Ganondorf. Everybody turned to look at him. "Oh, our lives, right."

The smashers, along with the other passengers of the plane, gathered in the first class section. They were trying to even themselves out.

"I'll go to the back, and Kirby can go to the front." Luigi said. "I'm skinny and he's a bit round, but he's so small I doubt he weighs more then me."

"Agreed." said Marth quickly. "King Dedede and King K. Rool, you take opposite sides; you both weigh about the same. Captain Falcon and Ganondorf, Mario and Pit, and me and Link will follow suit. Now let's get moving!"

A cheer erupted from the smashers. Half of them ran front, and half ran back. The pilot was finding it easier to control, but still couldn't get the plane straightened out. "I don't know why…the passengers seemed to be evened out…"

Crazy Hand spoke up. "Maybe the invisible people are favoring one side!" The pilot stared at him. He shrugged. "Or maybe it's the luggage."

"That's it!" the pilot said, snapping his fingers. He spoke into the intercom again. "Passengers, I am sorry to have to request this, but please rid the plane of all your belongings." He could hear shouts of outrage and refusal outside the cockpit. "It's your lives or belongings. You choose."

"And why should we?" cried out Ganondorf. Everybody on his side looked at him. "Oh, right."

"No worries! I have a way to save our lives, the plane, and our luggage too." Snake called out. He brought out his codec. "Otacon, bring in my helicopter. We've got some bags to keep safe."

Fox and Falco whipped out walkie talkies. "Slippy, we need two arwings, fast." They said together, typing in their coordinates.

Samus, Olimar, Wolf and Leon, on the other side, whipped out walkie talkies, calling their own ships. The ships were there within minutes.

"Heave!" shouted Snake, throwing one of the bags down to Otacon, who caught them and threw them into the helicopter. Tons of bags were being thrown down and caught; Pit had called his Paultena's servants, Balloon Fighter had brought in his allies, and Captain Falcon had brought in his ship. The pilot tried again, assisted by Crazy.

"Still can't straighten out!" he shouted. Suddenly it was much easier; Crazy looked out the window; all of Paultena's servants and Balloon Fighter's allies had started to lift the plane. K.K. continued to play dramatic music. The plane, with the help of the servants and allies, was gently lifted in the ocean while the pilot inflated the plane's tube from beneath. And suddenly they were there; in the ocean, safely back on Earth. A rubber slide unrolled from the exits. The smashers, who had been sweating and holding their breath, breathed again. They slid down the slide, taking life jacket's from the seats. A few rafts had emerged from the plane with the tube, and the passengers piled on. Last to emerge were Crazy and the pilot. Everybody erupted in applause. Crazy and the pilot bowed, and high fived each other. The pilot almost lost his balance and fell over. Suddenly they heard a voice. "Make room for Meta Knight!"

"And Bowser!" Bowser chimed in. Bowser was holding onto Meta Knight, and Meta Knight was gliding through the air. He let his cape drop, and they fell onto the raft. "What did we miss?" they asked together. The smashers clapped and greeted the smiling puffball and monster, patting them on the back and laughing. Master Hand went up to pat his brother on the back. He looked at the smashers. They had worked together; they had accepted each other; and they were treating each other like old friends. They were a team again. At least for now.


	5. Ski Lodge

**Chapter 5**

Bustman: Another quick update. Don't expect it to last forever; soon I have to go back to school. Anyways, today we have Link doing our disclaimer!

Link: Hey, Bustman. Tell me if I'm correct in saying you don't own anything but the fic, and everything else belongs to their respective owners.

Bustman: Yes, Link, you would be right in saying that.

Link: Great. Where's my prize?

Bustman: (stares at Link blankly)

Link: A reward? For saying the disclaimer?

Bustman: (finally getting what Link is saying and bursts out in a fit of laughter) Good one, Link. Get out of here. Enjoy the story!

* * *

An airplane touched down from the sky. Emerged from it were two giant hands and 55 smashers, all soaking wet. "Last time I ever fly that airline again." Samus muttered. "Floor can't even take one missile!"

Master Hand glared at Samus, and then turned to the pilot who had picked them up from the middle of the ocean and flew them there. "Thanks a lot. We owe you one."

"That's my job, sir."

"And such a good man like you deserves a tip!" Crazy smiled exuberantly.

"I couldn't- well, okay."

"Hope you like it! It's a poisonous scorpion diagnosed with rabies!" Crazy Hand said, putting it on the pilot's face. "It probably wants to be under the shade of your hat."

The pilot screamed, jumped in the plane, and started to fly away, forgetting to reload the fuel. The smashers whistled at the explosion that the plane created once it crashed into the ground.

"Glad we weren't in that," whispered Louie to Lyn.

"Anyways," said Master Hand, looking worried. "Let's hail a couple cabs and get to our lodge, shall we?"

The smashers all murmured in agreement. "All together now," said Master Hand. Whistling the same tune, they backed away, pretending nothing had happened.

* * *

"Wow, this place is da bomb!" Captain Falcon said, looking at the lodge. A bridge hung over a moat down below, with crocodiles snapping their teeth in it. The lodge itself was huge; it even had it's own lift up to the ski mountains so the smashers didn't have to wait in the long lines.

"A bomb? Where? This bomb will kill us all!" a man screamed, having overheard Captain Falcon. He jumped over the bridge into the moat, where he was ripped apart by crocodiles.

"They take things too literally here." Captain Falcon muttered.

"Hmm. He dropped his wallet." Link said. "He's already dead, so…"

"Nah, I don't think it would be wrong if we took it." Marth cut in, shrugging.

"Come on," Master Hand ordered, waving his, er, hand towards the door. "We have to check in."

The 57 guests piled into the hotel and walked up to the clerk. "Hi, we have 27 rooms reserved here."

The clerk grinned. "That will be 5,400." Master Hand nodded his head. He then reached into a wallet and pulled out 5,500 monopoly money.

"Here, buy yourself something nice." Master Hand said, putting 5,400 of the fake money on the desk and the other hundred in the clerk's shirt pocket. The clerk studied the money.

"Er, sir, this is not government approved money." Master Hand stared blankly at him.

"Now, Crazy!"

Crazy punched the clerk out, and the two hands and 55 smashers ran to the elevator, grabbing room keys.

"That was a close one." Master Hand panted as elevator doors shut. "Samus, did you shoot off the security camera like I asked?"

"Sure did!" Samus said happily. "I also destroyed their ice sculptures."

"And I crushed the furniture in their lounging area!" Krystal said happily. The vixen and bounty hunter high-fived each other.

The elevator doors opened, and the smashers piled out. "Alright, everyone." Master Hand said. "Me and Crazy will be rooming in room 501, so if you need us during an emergency, just knock."

"Except between 4:00 and 5:00. That's when I train my circus monkeys." Crazy said happily.

"Here are your room keys," said Master Hand, giving each person a key. "You are sharing rooms with the roommates we've assigned you."

Master Hand dropped a set of keys into Link's hands. "You have three people in your room. I expect you to be sensible in the choices you make, hear? You're the most responsible Link; don't disappoint me."

"Yes, sir." Link said, looking straight at Master Hand. Master Hand gave a tiny nod, and then dropped the keys into Zelda's hands, giving her the same message. She looked over at Link; he rolled his eyes and grinned so Master Hand couldn't see. He saw a small smile creep up her face.

"Now off you go! Remember; you are not spending any money unless it's from your own wallet!" Master Hand said, floating off to his and Crazy's room.

"Toodles!" Crazy said happily, following suit. The smashers began to split up towards their own rooms. Link, beckoning to Ike and Marth, walked over to his own room.

"Here it is," said Link, opening the door. "Home sweet home!"

He noticed only Marth was standing beside him, "Where's Ike?"

"Flirting," Marth grinned, rolling his eyes. "You can imagine how exuberant he's been for the last few days, finally having Lyn here."

"Huh," Link said, shaking his head and grinning with his friend. "Well, if he's not here…"

"…we get to call bunks, look through his luggage and lock him out," Marth finished.

"You know me too well," Link chuckled, closing the door behind him. "Let me guess; you want bottom bunk?"

"You can take top."

"Excellent. That leaves Ike with the nice, cozy couch."

"I'm sure he'll be pleased."

"Now, do you want to do the honors?"

"Love to."

"Go ahead."

Marth kicked open his bag. "Let's see… swordsmen breed deodorant…a camera…ah, jackpot. Did you know Ike kept a diary?"

"I do now. You don't think he'll mind if we take a peek, do you?"

"I'm pretty sure he will."

"Excellent!"

They both laughed and flipped it opened.

"Hmm…did you know he once had an affair with Peach?"

"No…did _you_ know his favorite movie is Chicken Little?"

The two looked at each other and burst out laughing, rolling around on the ground and streaming tears. Ike entered. "Hey guys. What's up?"

Marth quickly tucked away the diary. "Nothing, dude. Master Hand decided you had to sleep on the couch."

Ike's face turned red. "What? First he asks us to come back early, then he makes me sleep on the couch?"

"I know, dude. We tried to tell him that you should get one of the bunks," Link said, frowning and scratching his head. "But he said that he had picked your name out of a hat. Oh, well."

Ike sighed, and looked at his bag.

"Who opened my suitcase?"

"Er, I did. I need to borrow some deodorant for my date." Link said, thinking fast. "Speaking of which, I'm late. Zelda's probably getting impatient. Toodles!"

"Hey! That's my line!" Crazy shouted from a room 4 doors down. He turned back to 5 circus monkeys. "Alright, who here knows how to do a Jazz Square?"

"Crazy will you leave it? Circus monkeys don't know how--I stand corrected," Master Hand sighed, and flipped back open his book as the monkeys started dancing in circles.

* * *

"Can we come with you?" Ike asked, as Link got his jacket on.

"No, but if they're sold out, I'll come back and we can watch a movie here."

"Oh, so we're your second option? We're not good enough for you?" Ike demanded.

"Well, when you put it that way, yeah, I guess so. See you guys." Link called over his shoulder. Marth turned to Ike.

"How'd the mighty swordsman's flirtation go?" Marth asked.

"Well, let's see." Ike recounted. "I came in, the girls were taking a nap, I woke Peach up, she thought I was a robber, and she whacked me with her frying pan."

"Huh. I doubt Lyn is going to want to go on a date with you while you have a frying pan-sized dent in your head."

"I'm so attractive, she'll have to take me out, frying pan or not!" Ike roared.

"Sure, sure, whatever you say. I'm going to go to the gymnasium. Mario told me they're going to play some basketball. Newcomers not allowed." Marth sighed. "He's still fighting with his brother."

"Just dandy." Ike sighed. "Oh, well. I'm going to take a nap. Have fun."

* * *

The smashers piled into a cafeteria for dinner. Marth, Ike, Link, Meta Knight, Bowser, Luigi, Kirby and K.K. Slider sat down at a table together. Meanwhile, Mario, Pit, Snake, Sonic, Donkey Kong, Olimar and Samurai Goroh sat down at the other side of the room. "Death to newcomers!" Samurai Goroh yelled.

"Er, Samurai? You _are_ a newcomer," Diddy Kong whispered from another table, where he was sitting with Toon Link, Popo, Nana, Minun, Plusle, Pikachu and Ness and playing cards.

"Oh. Right." Samurai said, face falling. "Well, it's been fun, you guys."

"I hate how those guys won't warm up," murmured Marth. "I mean, it's not the newcomer's faults that the new game was created."

"Yeah. The newcomers should be welcomed!" Luigi said angrily. He sighed. "Anyways, how'd your game go?"

Marth grinned. "Beat Mario's team, 35-13. They were in tears when the whistle blew."

"Cool." Ike said, taking a bite out of his hamburger. He stared at the lunch line, where Red was trying to capture the lunch lady.

"Ike. Ike! Snap out of it!" Link said, snapping his fingers. Ike shook his head and looked back.

"Sorry. What do you think went wrong with Red when he was born?" Ike asked. Meta Knight shrugged.

"Probably dropped on his head."

"Like Ike was." Link said under his breath, remembering the 57th page of the diary.

"_What _was that?" Ike asked suspiciously.

"Er, nothing." Link said, winking at Marth. He coughed. "_Except your grandpa dropped you on your head when you were two._"

"He did not!" Ike blushed. He hastened to change the subject. "Anyways, how was your movie?"

"Fantastic. To bad you couldn't have been there. It was _Chicken Little._" The whole table erupted into hysterics. All of the other tables, not knowing what was going on, started uneasily laughing.

"Well, it seems like our bad luck has rubbed off on Ike." Bowser said.

"_Why _do you always have to say that?" Meta Knight grumbled, as a voice on the intercom said _We need two random guests to go out and see if Snowstorm Hill is suited for riding tomorrow. And those two guests are… Bowser and Meta Knight! Toodles!_

Meta Knight and Bowser grumpily walked away.

_Meanwhile, in the hotel manager's office…_

"Er, Crazy, that was a bit uncalled for. We have robots that test the conditions of our mountains," the hotel manager uneasily said.

"How dare you question me!? Attack, circus monkeys!" Crazy Hand shouted. A pack of circus monkeys jumped on the hotel manager and mauled him.

_Back in the dining area..._

The smashers tiredly walked back to their hotel rooms, having eaten their fill. Marth and Link immediately collapsed on their beds. Ike grumpily grabbed a sheet and pulled it over himself as he laid down on the couch. "I hate this. It sucks."

"Oh, go complain to Peach, why don't you? Are you guys still close?" Marth murmured, half asleep. Ike turned beet red.

"I- I don't know what you're talking about."

"Sure you don't." Link yawned, grabbing his green pajamas and walking into the bathroom. "I'll be changing if anyone needs me. 'Night.

* * *

Bowser and Meta Knight trudged through the snowstorm, shivering. "I t-t-told you we should've got-gotten jackets," Meta Knight chattered.

"Oh, toughen up, why don't you?" Bowser growled.

"J-just because _I_ don't have f-f-f-fire inside of me…" Meta Knight gasped, as a cold wind blew over him.

"Shut up. I'm dismissing the reader. Bustman acknowledges that this chapter isn't as long as usual, for he was facing writer's block, but we sincerely hope you enjoy it. T-toodles!"


	6. Out On The Slopes

Bustman: Hello, this is Bustman here. Sorry I took so long to update; I was working on my new Harvest Moon fic, _Village Life._ You can probably expect that I'll take a while to update again; I'm going on vacation. Anyways, today we have Red doing our disclaimer.

Red: Hey, Bustman. You a pokemon?

Bustman: Rest assured, no. But you keep thinking smashers are for the reader's amusement. Anyways, the disclaimer?

Red: Right. Bustman does not own anything related to Super Smash Bros. besides a copy of the game.

Bustman: Very good, Red. As always, I hope you enjoy the story, and urge you to review if you read it.

* * *

It was a beautiful morning. The sparrows chirped outside, and the bluebirds sang. Link pranced through the flowers, the sun beating down on his head. Everything was so perfect…that is, until he woke up.

Link shivered. Someone had left the window open, letting in all the frosty air. Ike was snoring on the couch, his open mouth leaking drool. From a room down the hall, Link could hear Crazy Hand's circus monkeys screeching, and Crazy Hand desperately trying to calm them down. Link sighed. Great. Now that he had woken up, he wouldn't be able to get back to sleep again. Instinct. When woken up in the middle of the night, something was usually wrong. And being the hero of his series, he always had to fix it.

Link quietly crept down the bunk bed ladder. Marth had all of his blankets pulled up around him; his teeth were chattering in his sleep. Link lumbered over to the window and shut it. The snow was falling less harshly then yesterday. He shut the window, and climbed back up to his bed. He rested his head on his pillow and prayed for the sandman to pay him a visit. No such luck.

Link opened his eyes and got out of bed again. He checked the time. 2:30. Still a good four and a half hours before his friends woke up. He opened the door quietly, trying to avoid waking anyone up. He walked down the hall towards the cafeteria. He could hear the smasher's gentle, rhythmic breathing in each room he passed. He stopped at Meta Knight and Bowser's room. No noise emitting from there. He sighed. His friends were probably still out on the mountain, freezing cold. He felt a pang of sympathy. He thought having an open window was bad.

He tiptoed into the cafeteria. No one there. He went over to the heat preserving container of hot chocolate, and poured himself a cup. He sat down at one of the tables and sipped it. He absentmindedly brushed his hand against the table.

"Ouch!" he hissed, pulling his hand up. It was leaking blood from a papercut. He looked down. A piece of paper, sure enough, was in front of him. **No Newcomers Allowed**. He sighed. Although he thought Mario was a formidable opponent, he didn't know why on earth anyone would choose to follow him.

"That hurt?"

Link quickly spun around. Zelda gave him a wry smile. "Couldn't sleep?"

Link sighed. "Correct."

Zelda picked up a napkin. "Hand on the table," she ordered. Link laid his hand on the wooden surface. Zelda put the napkin on the cut and applied pressure. She counted under her breath. Once she reached 30 she picked it up. The blood was all gone.

"Feel better already."

Zelda pulled up a chair. "No newcomers allowed, eh?"

Link shook his head. "Mario's work, not mine."

"Well, of course I know that. I know nobody like you would exclude." Zelda clamped her hand onto his and looked straight into Link's eyes. Link grinned.

"Only because I'd have you to answer you."

Zelda chuckled. "Believe me, if this keeps going on, Mario _will_ have to answer to me."

"And that will be the end of Mario's sports playing days."

"_If_ he's lucky."

The two of them laughed. Link took a sip out of his mug.

"So what brings you up so early?"

"You lumbering through the halls." Zelda laughed as Link blushed. "Honestly, your _horse_ can tiptoe quieter then you."

Link rolled his eyes. "My _horse_ doesn't save your butt every time you decide to get kidnapped."

Zelda pretended to be stung. "Hey, at least I actually _fight_ to save my kingdom. That's more then you can say for Peach."

"True, true."

Link got up and stretched. "Well, I'd better be getting back to bed. Big day tomorrow."

"The beginning of the frightening concept called Super Smash Bros. Fray." Zelda got up as well. "See you in the morning, Hero of Time."

"Ditto, Princess. Have a good night's rest."

* * *

Link blinked sleep out of his eyes. After tossing and turning for about 90 minutes, Link had finally gotten a few hours of sleep. He looked at the clock. 7:15. Link looked around. Ike was still snoring on the couch, but Link couldn't hear Marth below him. Must have already gone down for breakfast. Link hopped out of the bunk bed and kicked the couch.

"Dude. Wake up."

Ike slowly opened his eyes. "I was having the best dream," he complained crankily.

"Uh-huh. If you need me, I'll be showering," Link yawned, walking into the bathroom.

Ike threw off his covers and got up, stretching. He threw on some clothes and grabbed his swordsman breed deodorant. By the time he was ready, Link, with a green shirt and green pants, got out of the shower. They walked down to breakfast together. They sat down on either side of Marth, who was eating some porridge.

"'Sup?" Ike asked.

"Nothing. Meta Knight and Bowser haven't returned yet." Marth reported. Link absentmindedly stared at Mario's table, where they were shooing away Louie, who had apparently forgotten how newcomer-unfriendly the smashers at that table were. Louie looked at Olimar for support; Olimar uneasily looked away. Louie, head down, walked away.

"Oy! Louie! Over here!" Link called to the astronaut. Louie, looking confused, sat down.

"Not the nicest kids on the block, huh?" Marth asked sympathetically. Louie shook his head.

"Attention, smashers!" Master Hand walked up to the front of the cafeteria. Everybody went quiet.

"As you all know," Master Hand began. "We are skiing and snowboarding today. Who knows how to do either?"

Link, Popo, Nana, Sonic, Shadow, Samus and Lucario raised their hands.

"Fair enough, fair enough, the rest of you will learn." Master Hand said. "Now, unless you have brought your own snowboard or set of skis, in approximately 45 minutes we are meeting up at the top of the lift. They have an equipment shop there. We will be renting snowboards. After that, we have hired an instructor. He will teach us how to ski and snowboard. Yes, even those who already know," Master Hand said, glaring at Sonic, who had just opened his mouth to speak. "It will be good to refresh your memory. At 2:30 me and Crazy will meet you back at the hotel to have lunch. Then, you will go back out on the slopes and have free time until 5:00. Everybody got that?"

"Yes, Master Hand." The smashers all said together. Master Hand smiled.

"Good. See you in 45 minutes."

The smashers all erupted in conversation again. "So, when did you learn how to snowboard?" asked Marth, puzzled. Link smiled.

"Me and Zelda were going to go out to Aspen together a couple years ago." Marth uneasily ate another mouthful of porridge. "Zelda, unfortunately, came down with the flu. I didn't want to, but she insisted not to let the plane tickets go to waste, so I went and learned how to snowboard. Picked it up pretty easily; I used to surf when I was a kid. All about balance."

Marth swallowed his porridge. "Sounds cool."

"Yeah," Link grinned. "It was really fun. Anyways," he said, getting up. "I'm going to get my snowboarding clothes. See ya."

Link walked away from the table. He bumped into Zelda on the way back into his room. "Hey, ya ready to make up for that lost time in Aspen?"

"Yeah. You have no idea how jealous I was when Master Hand asked who knew the sport and saw your hand come up. Which do you think would be best for me, ski or snowboard?"

Link pondered this. "You have great control of your balance, which is necessary for both. Skiing is probably easier…"

"Snowboard it is." Zelda smiled. Link met her twinkling eyes. She always went for the challenge. He waved goodbye and walked up to his room.

"I know I put those goggles somewhere…" Link mused, burrowing through his bag. "Aha!"

"Found them?"

Link turned around, goggles in hand. Marth had just came up from breakfast. He had a plate of pancakes in his hand. "You were in such a hurry you forgot breakfast," he explained. "Thought I'd bring it up to you."

"Thanks." Link said, taking it from his hands. "Can't shred on an empty stomach." The two sat in silence for a while, the only sound was Link chewing.

"So," Marth asked distractedly. "Are you and Zelda doing something tonight?"

"Mmm, yeah," Link said, swallowing. "If the weather is nice, we're going to have a picnic in a clearing in the woods. You doing anything?"

"Nothing out of the usual. Ike is taking Lyn to the movies." Marth said sorrowfully. "It sucks being the only one in the room without a soul mate."

"Hey, I thought we were soul mates?" Link said, looking surprised. Marth rolled his eyes.

"Romantic partner, I mean. For which you are not ideally suited."

Link grinned and sat his plate down.

"Hey, I'm sure you'll find someone. If Ike can find one, it can't be hard for you."

"I suppose." Marth said, as Link grabbed a coat and put on his goggles. "Anyways, I should get to the equipment shop. I'm due there soon."

"I'll come with you, I suppose. Nothing better to do," Link said. "You ready? Then let's roll."

* * *

The smashers followed Master Hand as he looked for the instructor. Master Hand finally raced over to a blonde, tall man. "Excuse me, are you Michael?"

"Sure am." Michael said, looking around at the smashers. "There are only 53 of you."

"The other two are, er, sick."

"Ah, I see. Follow me everybody!" Michael called to the smashers. He led them into a large clearing, where another man with black hair and a beard was standing. "I've had the clearing reserved," he explained. "Now, those of you who are learning to snowboard, stay here with me. Those of you who are learning to ski, follow Woody."

He pointed to the black haired man. Most of the smashers walked over to Woody. Only Bowser Jr., Diddy Kong, Dixie Kong, Lucario, Captain Falcon, Link, Zelda, Ganondorf, Falco, Wolf, Krystal, Sonic, Shadow, Samus and Marth stayed behind, snowboards in hand.

"Now, who knows what foot we keep off the snowboard when we're on lifts?"

"Right!"

"Middle!"

"Neither!"

"Both!"

"Snap Crackle Pop Rice Krispies!"

"Left. If you're left footed, use your right." Link said calmly. Michael smiled.

"Very good. Now, I want everyone to latch their right foot onto the snowboard and ride across the clearing. Can you do that?"

"Depends. How much are we getting paid?" Ganondorf asked.

"_We're not getting paid, idiot. We're paying him._" Lucario said impatiently.

"And why should we?"

"Maybe you'd be more comfortable in the skiing section, hmmm?" Michael suggested. Ganondorf shrugged.

"Fine. See you, losers."

Shadow was the first to reach the other side of the clearing, then Link, then Samus, then Lucario. The others were still only a quarters way there, all of them falling every time they got back up. Link and Lucario shared an exasperated glance. Diddy Kong and Zelda reached them first, followed by Wolf, Falco, Captain Falcon. The rest took a while to catch up.

"Okay, okay," Michael said once they were all at the other end of the clearing. "Now, we're all going to go down a tiny slope called the Bunny Hill, okay?"

"Er, Mike?" Ganondorf asked, walking back over to the snowboarders. "Woody said I'd be more comfortable in the snowboarding section."

Michael rubbed his forehead warily. "This is going to be a long day."

* * *

Once all the smashers had gathered at the top of the hill, Michael spoke again. "Now, when you snowboard, you cross the hill, and then cross back until you reach the bottom. Which way do you lean when you're going from right to left?"

"Back." Link immediately said. "And forward for front."

"Very, very good! Let's go, then. Link, show them how it's done."

Link strapped his right foot onto the snowboard and then criss-crossed down the mountain, stopping in the middle to wait for everyone else. Link watched all the others follow suit. Sonic and Shadow were beside him before he could even blink, and then Samus did a perfect zig-zag down the mountain. Lucario took his time, but never fell. His form was perfect. Link turned uneasy when it was Zelda's turn, but had no reason to do so. She started out a bit slow, but then went faster, always keeping her balance perfectly, like he had suggested. Bowser Jr. had more trouble getting down, falling down at least ten times. He was blushing by the time he had reached them. Michael clapped his hands.

"Excellent work, everybody! Now let's finish this mountain together!"

The smashers all started going down. Bowser Jr. uneasily twisted and turned on his snowboard. Link rode patiently behind him, helping him up if he fell while Michael helped the other smashers. Zelda rode behind him, keeping an eye on the small koopa as well. Finally, Bowser Jr. started to pick up speed.

"Whoa!" He shouted as he rode left down the mountain. Link, who had thought he was finally getting the hang of it, was completely wrong. The poor little koopa was out of control.

"Hang on!" Link shouted. He shifted directions and chased after Bowser Jr., Zelda determinedly following him. Bowser Jr. broke through the wires that prevented snowboarders from riding into the forest and zoomed into the trees.

"Oh no!" Zelda gasped. "He'll crash into a tree!"

Link put on a face of determination and followed after the koopa, who was only a couple yards away from a tree. He leaped and landed on top of Bowser Jr., just before he hit the tree. They rolled down the hill until they slowed to a stop. Link got up.

"Thanks." Bowser Jr. panted.

"No problem. The next time you get out of control, force yourself to fall down so that doesn't happen again."

"Right." Bowser Jr. said as Zelda rode up to them. "Are you two okay?" she panted.

"We're fine." Link panted. Zelda relaxed. "Come on," she soothed, taking Bowser Jr.'s hand. "Let's go back to the slope."

"Er, Zelda?" Link uneasily said. "Where is the slope? All I can see around us is trees."

Zelda froze, and then sighed. "Anyone have a cell phone?"

"No," Link said.

"Nuh-uh." Bowser Jr. shook his head. Zelda clucked her tongue.

"Okay, let's stay here. Hopefully, someone will notice we're gone." Zelda said calmly. She sat down on a rock, her clear blue eyes obviously troubled. Link sat down next to her, while Bowser Jr. fiddled his thumbs on the grass. After a few minutes, he froze.

"Hear that?" he asked. "Someone's coming."

Sure enough, someone was lumbering through the woods. Link reached for his sword, but found nothing at his belt. Shoot. He forgot he didn't snowboard with weapons.

A large monster stepped out of the trees, covered in leaves and branches. Bowser Jr. squealed. Link and Zelda dived on top of the monster.

"Ahhh! No! It's me-Bowser!!" Link and Zelda froze at these words. They backed away. As they got a better look, they saw it was indeed Bowser, covered in frost and leaves. Slung over his shoulder was a near-frozen Meta Knight, chattering. Zelda looked at the both of them sympathetically.

"We're sorry for attacking you, Bowser. Here, set Meta Knight down; I'll warm you both up."

Bowser chattered his thanks, and set Meta Knight down. She pressed her palm gently to both of their hearts. The powerful magic erupting from her fingertips spread through the two, melting the frost.

"Ahhh…" Bowser sighed. "That feels nice."

"Agreed," Meta Knight said, relaxed. Bowser Jr. waved hi to his father.

"Hey, dad!"

"Son!" Bowser cried out, delighted. "What are you three doing here?"

Link answered. "I lost control of my snowboard. Jr. and Zelda had to save me."

"That's m'boy!" Bowser said, reaching out his arms. His son gave him a swift hug. Link winked at him as Zelda touched his shoulder and smiled.

"Well, if you three are lost, I could fly up and see where we are," Meta Knight suggested. The three beamed.

"That'd be great," Zelda answered for them. Meta Knight hopped up some tree branches and jumped up into the air, gliding around. He landed after a few seconds.

"We're not that far from the slope," he said. "It's that way."

"Excellent. Let's go."

* * *

The smashers hungrily dug into lunch. "I feel like I haven't eaten for days." Olimar said, licking his lips.

"Yeah, skiing will do that to you," Fox said, digging into some French fries. Link sipped his hot chocolate. He turned to Marth.

"How'd snowboarding with Michael go?"

"Are you kidding? While you, Zelda and junior were out there having an adventure, I landed on my bottom more times then I bothered to count. I'm going to be so sore in the morning."

"Skiing was no better." Ike admitted, taking a bite out of his hamburger. "Honestly, we had one teacher instructing 37 smashers. He could only help so many people at once."

"Attention, smashers." Master Hand said, floating up to the front of the room. "So we don't forget why we're all here, a battle will be held. This will be a team battle, with all items present and one life each. Crazy Hand, care to select the four players out of a hat?"

"Certainly," Crazy cackled, reaching into a hat. He pulled two slips of paper out. "On the red team, will be…Mario and Olimar!"

"Alright!" Mario said with glee, high fiving Olimar.

"On the blue team will be…Link and Bowser Jr.!"

Mario and Olimar's faces hardened as they saw they were due to fight a newcomer. Link turned to Bowser Jr., who looked a bit intimidated by Mario. "You ready?"

Bowser Jr. gulped. "S'pose so."

Link and Bowser Jr. walked into a pain simulator, which Master Hand had brought with him so they could have daily matches. Mario and Olimar walked into the other two.

"And here we…go!" Crazy grinned, pulling the lever. The four smashers appeared on the Warioware Inc. stage.

READY…GO!

Link ducked as Mario shot F.L.U.D.D. at him, and took out a bomb and threw it. Mario took out his shield while Olimar, having already plucked some pikmin while Mario distracted him with F.L.U.D.D., threw one at Link. It collided with a fireball and died; Link turned to see Bowser Jr. looking proud of himself. Suddenly Mario shot a fireball at Bowser Jr., and he jumped to avoid it. While in midair, Olimar took out his pikmin chain and hit the small koopa in the gut. Link, enraged that they were ganging up on the newcomer, jumped up and sliced the pikmin chain in half. Olimar helplessly fell to the ground; Link aimed his sword downward and dropped, propelling Olimar into the sky. Olimar threw a pikmin at him; Link, not expecting it, allowed it to latch on, sucking at his life. Bowser Jr. hid in his shell and whirled towards Link. The pikmin, frightened, jumped off and ran back to Olimar. Bowser Jr. came out of his shell, only to be propelled upwards by Mario's Super Jump Punch. Link turned to face Mario and swung his sword at him; however, Mario had taken out his cape and switched Link's direction, leaving the sword to slice midair. Mario ran at him from behind, and Olimar ran at him from the front. Link jumped up, and the two collided. Link then grabbed a bomb and threw it down; it blew up between the two opponents, and they were propelled away. Mario used his Super Jump Punch to recover; however, Link drew his bow and arrow and shot at Mario over and over, making it hard to recover. However, he managed to grab onto the edge, and trip Link as he ran towards him. He then used his Super Jump Punch to propel him upwards, and Olimar used his pikmin chain to lash at his head. Bowser Jr. took out a koopa shell and threw it, hurting both Olimar and Mario in the middle of their attacks. Link threw his boomerang, but instead of hitting Mario, as intended, it his a smash ball which had just appeared. Everybody hastened to get towards it, but suddenly a loud voice said DANCE!

The stage arubtly changed, and a guy with an afro was shown doing the disco. All four of them uneasily danced, Mario and Olimar waltzing, Link doing a Jazz Square and Bowser Jr. clumsily break-dancing. It went back to the original stage, where they all grew larger. Mario raced for the smash ball, which was lazily drifting around the middle, but Bowser Jr. head-butted him, and whirled around inside his shell, his spikes damaging the smash ball. Olimar threw a pikmin at it, but the smash ball just drifted over to the right. Link threw a bomb upwards, but it missed. Mario ran for the smash ball again, jumping up to try and get it, but Link grabbed hold of his legs and pulled him down. Bowser Jr. jumped up and head-butted the smash ball. Bright red energy poured into him. Bowser Jr. pulled out a paintbrush and painted an army of koopas, goombas, Hammer bros. and shy guys, which went around the stage snapping at Olimar and Mario, and pushing them off the stage. Mario began to do a super jump punch, but Olimar let out his chain of pikmin, which wrapped around him and pulled him down with Olimar.

"You idiot!" he shouted, as the two fell off the stage to their deaths.

GAME!

Link and Bowser Jr. emerged from the simulators. The smashers burst into applause.

"You two were amazing!" Zelda smiled, embracing them both. Bowser Jr. turned beet red. Link turned to him.

"Hey man, that was awesome. Amazing final smash! Now everyone will know not to mess with _you_!"

"I- I guess so." Bowser Jr. smiled. Mario and Olimar grumpily walked back to their table, not even bothering to shake the other team's hands.

"Great match!" Master Hand said, delighted. "As K.K. has proved once before, don't underestimate the power of newcomers!"

Grumbling emitted from Mario's table.

"You have the rest of the afternoon to do whatever you want on the slopes. Have a fun time. I bid you farewell."

* * *

Bustman: Wow, I think that may be my longest chapter yet. Anyways, please review; I hold my arms open to both positive and negative ones. But I urge you to, if you didn't like the chapter, tell me what I could improve on. T-

Red: May I?

Bustman: Together now.

Bustman & Red: Toodles!


	7. The Rescue

Bustman: Hello, I'm back with another chapter!

Ganondorf: Like anyone cares…

Bustman: Hey, more people care about my story then your three autobiographies combined…

Ganondorf: (Bursts out in tears) Why did nobody buy The Tragic Life of a Froot Loop?

Bustman: Because it had a lame cover, it was poorly written, and you spelled _fruit_ wrong. Anyways, the disclaimer?

Ganondorf: Sniff…Bustman does not own anything related to Super Smash Bros.. Nintendo owns it.

Bustman: Thank you, Ganon, very efficient. Please, if you do read, review. Anyways, enjoy the story!

* * *

Link got up and stretched, blinking sleep out of his eyes. Marth and Ike were still sleeping. He looked at the time. 6:45. He shook his head. He was on vacation. Why did his body always have to wake up so early?

He climbed down the ladder of the bunk bed. He opened the door and headed to the cafeteria. Only a few people were there; Mario, R.O.B., Sonic, Mr. Game, Watch, Samus and Wolf were all discussing something or another. Mario and Sonic were arguing who was the best mascot, Samus and Wolf were arguing over which horror movie was the goriest in existence, and Mr. Game and Watch and R.O.B. were arguing in some language that consisted of _boops, bops, _and_ beeps_ that Link couldn't understand. He poured himself a cup of hot chocolate and sat down at Mario and Sonics' table.

"And I am-a telling you, hedgehog, that I am the-a best mascot!"

"Oh, please! I'm a hedgehog faster then the speed of light, and you're an Italian carpenter…"

"_Plumber…_"

"Plumber, whatever, who has to fight off mushrooms and turtles while I'm out there fighting evil masterminds!"

"Can I cut in?" Link asked, who had been unnoticed up until then. "I think you're both self-centered idiots. Just my opinion."

"Oh, thanks, Link. That helps a _lot_," Mario rolled his eyes, irritated. More people had started to come into the cafeteria. Luigi sat down at the table, and when Mario noticed this, he got up and moved. Luigi looked troubled.

"You know, we used to be great friends…" Luigi sighed sadly. Link clamped his hand on his shoulder.

"I'm sure, deep down, you still are. Your brother will come to his senses soon. I'm positive."

Luigi relaxed a little bit. "I guess so."

"Attention, smashers!"

Everybody looked to the front of the room, where Master Hand was floating. He cleared his throat.

"Today, you are completely free of any ski or snowboard lessons. You may spend the day in town, or still go out on the slopes. Your choice."

An interested murmur broke out across the room. Master Hand raised his voice.

"I have two more announcements. Tonight, at 8:30, we are having a team battle. The participants will be Zelda and Marth on the red team…"

The two smashers high-fived each other grinning.

"And Krystal and Isaac on the blue team."

Zelda and Marth smiled. Through Link, they had become good friends and a good team.

"My last announcement of the day before we leave: we will be holding a small party, to get everybody excited for the game. There will be food, battles and dancing…" Master Hand shut his eyes and prepared for the explosion of chatter at this news. He had to shout to be heard.

"Please everybody, you can chatter all you want later! That is all I have to say. You are dismissed."

Everybody erupted in chatter again. Marth tapped Link's arm.

"What do you want to do today? Town or slopes?"

Link thought about this for a moment. "Town, I think. We're not going to get many other chances to go into it."

"Sure," Marth said, particularly cheerful about something. "Zels, Luigi, Kirby, want to come?"

Luigi and Kirby bobbed their heads happily, while Zelda shook hers.

"I'm going to work on my snowboarding today," she said. "But you guys have fun."

"But we'll come!" Bowser said brightly, walking up to their table, Meta Knight at his side. "We've had quite enough snow for a while."

"Well then, come on." Link said, getting up. "It's a boy's day out."

* * *

Link, Marth, Kirby, Luigi, Bowser and Meta Knight walked into town, looking around in awe at the buildings.

"Well, men," Link turned to the five boys behind him. "What should we do today?"

"Let's go watch Beauty and the Beast at the theater!" Bowser called out. Everybody stared at him. He shrugged. "Or not. We all have a vote."

"I think Bowser has a good idea, though. We should go see a movie," Marth said. Link shook his head.

"I disagree. I think the movie best be saved for later tonight. I think we should do something else during the day."

"I agree," Meta Knight said. "I think movies are better saved for when it's dark."

"I guess you're right," Marth said. "So, what do you want to do?"

"How about we go to the museum?" Luigi asked, relaxing once they had moved away from the subject of darkness. "I hear they have a new exhibit of videogame heroes. I bet some of us are there."

"Oh yeah, my agent told me about that." Link said. "Sounds good."

Everybody murmured their agreement, and they headed over in the direction of the museum. Suddenly, Luigi froze.

"Oi, K.K., over here!" Luigi waved his hand. K.K. had just walked out of a café, guitar in hand. K.K. waved back and walked over.

"Yo, guys. Wassup?"

"We were just headed over to the museum. Want to come?" Luigi asked kindly. K.K. let a small smile creep onto his face.

"Sounds great."

"Well then, lets-a-go!"

The seven walked over to a large, white building, held up by two columns. Residents of the town were lounging around on the front steps. The inside was much warmer then outside, and a great number of people were inside, out of the cold. Link gestured over to a dinosaur, looking very fearsome, even when it was dead.

"Wonder if he was a relative of Yoshi's?" Bowser thought aloud, studying it. Meta Knight shrugged.

"Could very well be. Come on, we don't want to spend all day staring at this dinosaur."

The seven went to many exhibits, from aquatic creatures ("Ahhhh, shark!" Luigi shouted,) to mythical creatures ("Uncle Frank!" Bowser said tearfully, looking at the legendary fire turtle. They moved on quickly after that.)

Finally, they came to video-game heroes. They bumped into Crazy Hand on the way in, surrounded by his circus monkeys.

"Hey, Crazy Hand, what are you doing here?" Marth asked. Crazy gave him a wide smile.

"I'm showing this little one what a museum looks like," Crazy said fondly, pointing to the smallest circus monkey. "He's so excited!"

"Well, have fun!" Luigi smiled, as Crazy floated away with the monkeys. The seven walked into the video game hero exhibit.

"Hey, the Majora's Mask!" Link said, surprised. "I didn't know that still existed!"

"Hey, there are me and Mario's hats from our first game!" Luigi said, looking at two pixilated caps. Kirby was staring at a warp star, while Meta Knight was studying a replica of his ship.

"Hey, look!" Bowser said, chuckling. "It's a bottle of magical fire collected from my castle!"

As he said this, Kirby lightly tapped the warp star. It suddenly rose up and shot straight into Luigi, who staggered backwards, swinging his arms wildly trying to keep his balance. One of his hands hit the hilt of a sword Marth was examining. Marth ducked as it flew inches from his neck, and it hit the replica of Meta Knight's ship, which was flung into a replica of K.K.'s guitar. It flew into the air and landed on the bottle of fire, which cracked open. The fire spread onto the guitar, and the flames started to spread to the walls and ceilings. Everyone froze.

"Run!" Marth shouted. The seven ran out of the room as fast as their legs would carry them, just before a flaming piece of the roof fell in front of the door. They bounded into the lobby.

"FIRE!!" Bowser shouted to all the people lounging in the chairs. As he spoke, the fire spread into the room. Everybody screamed and ran toward the exit.

"Please, nobody panic!" the manager said, walking out of his office. "Remain calm, and…" he froze as fire spread to his suit.

"OH MY GOD, I'M ON FIRE!" he screamed. "WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? EVERYBODY PANIC!!"

The screaming continued, and everybody continued to the door. The fire was spreading very quickly, and it didn't look like everyone could get out of the small doorway in time. Something suddenly clicked in Link's head. He pulled out a bomb and threw it at the wall. It blew up, and a crack ran down it. Everybody stared at Link like he was mad.

"Come on!" he shouted, gesturing towards the wall. "We have to blow this up to create a bigger entrance!"

Everybody pondered this. Bowser frowned, and then suddenly snapped his fingers.

"Link's got a point!" He grunted, banging his head into the wall, which cracked even more. Meta Knight shrugged and joined in with some fancy sword-work, and Marth slashed at the wall with his sword as well, while Luigi head-butted the wall and Kirby used his hammer to damage it. Finally, as K.K. banged his guitar into it, the wall fell down. They ran out, followed by a crowd of people who had been pushing to get through the door.

The seven panted outside. "Is everyone okay?" Link asked warily. Everybody nodded their head.

"One, two, three, four, five, six, seven…oh no!" Crazy gasped, counting his circus monkeys. "I'm missing Mojo!"

"What?!" Link said, alarmed.

Crazy Hand was weeping now. "He's so little… he'll never survive… why do the good have to die so young?!"

"Calm down. Bowser," he said, turning toward the koopa. "Is it possible to extinguish this magical fire?"

Bowser shook his head. "No. It is so powerful it will shield the largest of explosions, let alone water."

Link gritted his teeth. "Very well. We'll have to find him."

"We will?" Marth asked, alarmed. He shook his head. "...I mean, yes, we will!"

Link bounded up the museum steps. He turned to his friends. "I want K.K., Bowser and Meta Knight to come with me. K.K., you'll be best at sniffing the monkey out, Bowser, you know most about this type of fire, and Meta Knight can fly us out if we get in trouble. Marth, Luigi, and Kirby, I want you to stay here and check that everyone's safe."

The smashers assigned to stay nodded grimly. Link saluted them and bounded up to the smoking museum, followed by Bowser, Meta Knight and K.K.. Link looked wildly around for an entrance, as the wall had caved in, blocking the two front entrances.

"Over here!" Meta Knight said, pointing to a grate. Link slashed it open and turned to Bowser.

"I'm sorry, Bowser, but you're not going to be able to fit in here…"

"No. I will not turn back," the large koopa said stubbornly. "You need my knowledge on the fire. Don't worry," he added quickly as he saw Meta Knight's worried look. "I'll find a safe way in." And with that, the large koopa ran off. Link dropped down to his knees and began to crawl through the air vent, followed by K.K. and Meta Knight. He peeked through the next grate below him. Nothing there but a burning gift shop. He continued through the metal passageway until he came to a steel ladder. "This is the only way up…" he murmured, half to himself.

"I can smell a living being." K.K. thought aloud, looking at the ladder. "From up there."

"Then it's settled." Meta Knight said. Link nodded his head and went up the ladder. The metal passageway stretched on, dotted by a few grates. Link continued to crawl, relaxing a little bit. Suddenly, flames began to lick at a nearby grate. The three froze. The grate was beginning to get charred. If it gave way, the flames would spread up to the vent. Link peered down at a grate below him. A dolphin replica stared back up at him from the aquatics section, where water trembled from the disturbance of peace.

"Down below us water. The fire hasn't spread onto it. It's the only way out of here," Link quickly called over his shoulder.

"I don't know how to swim," Meta Knight said, trembling.

"I do. Just hold onto me." K.K. reassured him. Link slashed the grate open and jumped down into the water just as the grate ahead of them crumbled and the flames came up to the vent. He hit the chilly water straight like a pencil, and sunk to the near bottom before swimming back up to the top. A drenched K.K. was supporting a chattering Meta Knight at the surface. Link hopped out of the large tank of water, followed by K.K. and Meta Knight.

"I can definitely smell monkey now," K.K. reported.

Link nodded and looked at his surroundings. Flames blocked the doorway into the jungle exhibit, but only a small fire blocked the dinosaur exhibit. Link, K.K. and Meta Knight jumped over it and looked around. Charred dinosaur bones surrounded them. Suddenly K.K.'s ears pricked up.

"I can hear the monkey in the next room." K.K. said, nodding over to the video game heroes exhibit. Link nodded and walked over to the entrance. Suddenly, the fire spread to the curtained door, making it impossible to go through. Link turned back to the door in which they had come in, thinking they'd find another way through, but found that it had also spread fire. There was no escape.

Suddenly, a large bang could be heard from above, and then a section of the roof gave way, landing on top of the flaming entrance to the video game heroes exhibit and putting out the fire. Bowser jumped down from the broken roof, grinning.

"Did I come at the right time or what?"

Link grinned and clamped Bowser's shoulder. "You sure did, buddy. Come on; I can hear the monkey now too."

The four ran into the video game heroes exhibit, where the fire had started. The small, baby monkey Mojo was screeching, surrounded by flames.

"How're we supposed to get to him?" Meta Knight asked, crushed. Link looked around, frowning.

"Hey, look up there!" Bowser said, pointing up. A charred wooden beam stretched from the right wall to the left wall, directly above the baby monkey. Link nodded and took out his claw shot, aiming it up. The claw latched onto the beam, and Link began to climb it, followed by K.K., Meta Knight, and Bowser.

"This reminds me of my school days." Meta Knight said. He imitated the voice of his gym teacher. "Meta Knight! Climb that rope! Use some upper body strength! Hustle, hustle, hustle!"

Link hopped onto the wooden beam. Being careful not to lose his balance, he crawled across the narrow board until he was right below the monkey. "How're we supposed to get him?"

Meta Knight raised his hand. "I'll glide down and grab him, then fly back up." He stood up, wobbling a little bit.

"Good luck." Bowser said, looking worried for his friend. Meta Knight nodded and jumped down, gliding over to the clearing the monkey was in.

"Here we go, little buddy." Meta Knight said gently, scooping the monkey up. He then jumped from the halberd replica to the Groudon statue and jumped into the air just as the clearing went up in flames. He flapped up to the beam, and reached out his hand to grab the wooden surface. However, he came short, and began to fall. K.K. reached down his guitar quickly, and Meta Knight grabbed it. Bowser helped K.K. pull them back up. The circus monkey chattered and grabbed onto Link's back. Link gave a small smile.

"How are we going to get out of here now?" Meta Knight panted, slumping down on the wooden beam after thanking K.K.

"Look over there," Link said, pointing to his left. Everybody's head turned. A grate was dotted at the top of the ceiling, within reach. Link took his claw shot, latched it onto the grate and pulled. The grate clattered down into the flames.

"I'll check if it's on fire or not." Link said, crawling over to the vent. He put his head through the empty space and looked around. On the right were many flames, but on the left there was one unharmed grate. He pulled the rest of his body through. He crawled over to the last grate and looked down. The electricity room was directly beneath him. He assumed the outdoors were directly outside it, as this was the last room in the museum. Suddenly, an idea came to him. _It is so powerful it will shield the largest of explosions._ Link gritted his teeth and took out a bomb. He slashed open the grate and squeezed his eyes shut. He threw the bomb down and scrambled back.

KABOOM!!

The electricity room blew up, collapsing the walls that held it. However, the large explosion did not spread to the video game hero room. The large, magical fire shielded the blow, as Link had predicted. Trembling, he climbed back down to the wooden beam, where his friends were looking frightened as they heard the large explosion. He beckoned to the grate.

"I collapsed the electricity room. Bowser's fire shielded us, but the room collapsed. We can get out now."

Link climbed back into the grate, followed by Meta Knight, K.K. and Bowser, who had to squeeze to get through. He jumped through the last grate, and landed on the ashes that were once a room. He looked around. He was on the right side of the museum. The three smashers jumped down next to him, and they walked around to the front. An enormous cheer erupted as the heroes came into view. Link looked around, grinning. It looked like Master Hand had brought all the smashers to the museum, and several news channel reporters and journalists were gathered around, filming the smashers and taking pictures. Luigi, Kirby and Marth ran up to embrace the four, followed by Zelda, Ike and Captain Falcon, followed by the rest of the smashers as Mojo the monkey ran to Crazy Hand. Link broke away from the smashers, grinning. He had never received this warm a welcome in Hyrule. He turned to look at Mario, who was kicking the dirt sheepishly. He finally straightened up and walked over to K.K..

"K.K.," Mario began, taking a deep breath. "I'm sorry for the way I've been treating you. You just proved," he nodded to the museum. "That newcomers are capable of as much as veterans. So, I would like to apologize. To all of you," he said, turning to all of the newcomers. K.K. stepped forward and shook his hand.

"Apology accepted, my friend."

The rest of the newcomers murmured their agreement, nodding their heads. Mario smiled and turned to Luigi.

"Brother, I'm sorry for the way I've been treating you too, lately. I've been a jerk. Will you accept an old, confused plumber's apology?"

Luigi gave a watery grin, "Apology accepted."

He embraced his brother, to which the smashers clapped. The press was eagerly writing down every word the smashers were saying.

"Well," Crazy Hand said, floating up to the smashers with Mojo on his back. "I think we've all learned a valuable lesson today. Never underestimate the power of Swiss cheese."

"Er, yeah," Master Hand said, floating up. "Speaking of cheese, who's hungry for some grilled cheese back at the lodge?"

"Me!"

The smashers and the brother hands walked back to the lodge, leaving the press and museum behind, chatting and laughing like they were old friends.

Maybe a fourth game wouldn't be to bad after all.

* * *

Bustman: Although the ending may sound like it, the story is not over yet. You can expect a lot more chapters coming.

Ganondorf: Boooooo!

Bustman: Oh, shut up. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed this chapter, as always. Please review, and if you have a funny idea about who should do the disclaimer next time tell me in your review. Toodles!


	8. Movie Night

Bustman: Hey, back again. Sorry I'm so late, but I've been traveling a ton, and haven't been able to update for a while. Before we start, I'd like to say something. The events in my new story, _Tabuu's Revenge_, are in no way connected to the events in _Life_. All the smashers who are killed in that still live in this story.

Pikachu: Pika, pika!

Bustman: …Right. Wave to the people, Pikachu.

Pikachu: (Waves happily.)

Bustman: Anyways, I do not own anything besides the fic, okay? Please review!

* * *

Things were going well at the ski lodge since the fire. After Zelda and Marth lost a close game to Isaac and Krystal later that night, Mario and his posse cheered for the two newcomers as they emerged from the simulator. The next day the only thing that was cold was the snow, which the smashers skied and snowboarded on smoothly. Everyone was getting better, even the clumsy Bowser Jr.. Mario and Luigi were on speaking terms again, and sat at the same table whenever a break was called. Link was happy to see this; he knew that Luigi had been worried about his and Mario's relationship.

As it grew nearer, more hype about the party arose. People were now wondering if they should ask others to the party, if they should bring food, and what they should wear.

"For the last time, just wear your regular old getup!" Link said, beginning to get irritated as Marth asked what he should wear. "Honestly, your starting to sound like Peach."

A week after the fire and a day before the party, Link sat down for dinner, chicken and pasta today. Several of the other smashers came over and sat down at Link's table.

"Prepared for your battle tonight, Kirby, Meta Knight?" Link asked, swallowing his pasta. Kirby didn't seem to hear him, as he was busy gobbling down food, but Meta Knight answered.

"It's been delayed. Haven't you heard? Tonight is movie night."

"Really?" Link asked, surprised. Meta Knight gestured over to a poster on the wall. Link scanned the poster quickly. "So, we're meeting up in the den of the lodge?"

"That's right. We're going to vote on a movie," Marth said, taking a sip of seltzer water. "Master Hand hasn't told us the nominees yet."

"Speak of the devil," Mario muttered, looking up at the front of the cafeteria. Master Hand, Crazy Hand and Mojo were floating there, clearing their throats. Everybody followed Mario's gaze and went silent.

"As you all know, tonight is movie night. At 8:30 tonight, we are going to gather in the den, which the hotel manager has unwillingly- I mean, kindly, lent us, and choosing a movie. The daily battle with Kirby and Meta Knight against Shadow and Wolf has been delayed, and will be fought another time. This will be a pajama party--"

Captain Falcon wolf-whistled; Samus punched him in the face.

"-and you are allowed to bring blankets or a pillow. Food and drink are permitted. That is all."

"And happy Viking Melody Day! Row, row, row your boat…" Crazy sang, as he followed Master Hand out of the room. Link rolled his eyes and turned to his tablemates.

"Oh, I do hope it's _Beauty and the Beast,_" Bowser said happily. Peach nodded her head.

"I don't know. I think an action film would be cool," Sonic said, putting his feet up on the table.

"I'm personally hoping for a film with lots of old-fashioned fighting," Marth said, to which Meta Knight nodded.

"I want to see comedy, but I'm also holding out for a documentary. I want to watch the one about that lazy slob who did absolutely nothing but eat."

"You mean the one about you?"

"I'm crossing my fingers for a horror movie," Samus cut in, to which Wolf put his paw out for a high five.

"I'm hoping it's a chick flick!"

Everybody turned to Captain Falcon, who was looking around nervously.

"…What?"

Samus sighed, got out her plasma whip and stormed towards Captain Falcon, who gave out a girl like scream and jumped into Pit's arms. Pit pulled his arms back, and Captain Falcon fell to the ground, where Samus zapped him with her whip. Everyone turned to Pit. He shrugged.

"I'm on vacation, aren't I?"

* * *

Link got out of the shower and pulled out a white A-shirt and some short green pants. He put them on quickly and grabbed a toothbrush. Marth joined him by the sink, with a long blue T-shirt and some brown shorts, brushing his teeth as well. Ike walked in, with teddy-bear pajamas on.

"So, what do you think?"

"I think Lyn is going to find you very sexy with those cute bears," Link said seriously, while Marth was trying hard to hold back a fit of laughter. Ike, however, didn't notice this, and grabbed his toothbrush as Link threw his back into the bin. He grabbed a pillow and sheet, and got his green nightcap. Marth got his pillow and blanket as well. Ike came out of the bathroom, pondering something.

"Hey guys, do you think I should also wear my 'Foxy Grandpa' cap?"

Link and Marth ran from the room before they burst out laughing. After they were done roaring with laughter, they walked calmly into the room, where Ike was getting some popcorn and drinks. Ike stood up as the microwave beeped, and pulled the popcorn out. Link and Marth grabbed the cooler, and they headed downstairs.

The den was on the lowest floor, with many bean-bag chairs and couches, with a comfy, soft floor the smashers could lie down on. Master Hand and Crazy Hand were already downstairs, picking out which movies would be appropriate as nominees. Samus, in a white hoody, and Wolf, in some dark blue, cool looking sleepwear, were eagerly watching which movies they were picking out, giving excited yelps whenever they picked up a horror movie. Peach, in a pink nightgown, was snuggling against Mario's red-shirted chest, as the Italian plumber ate popcorn he was supposed to be saving for the movie. Luigi, in green pajamas, and Kirby, in his Sleep Kirby gear, were busy gagging as the two shared an occasional smooch. Ganondorf, in black pajamas, and Wario, in yellow, were busy building a house of cards on the coffee table. However, any time they got close to finishing the house, an invisible force would knock it over. The two would then look at each other, shrug, and start over, as Lucario howled with laughter in the corner.

Link set down the blankets on the ground lined up with the couch, and laid down, leaning his head against it. Marth sat down next to him, cracking up as Ike waited by the door for Lyn. When she finally came, she took one look at Ike and excused herself, walking out. With his sharp Hyrulian ears, Link was sure he could hear a fit of laughter in the other room. Zelda walked in after Lyn came in for a second time, trying to calm her down. Ike took her hand and walked her over to the couch, where they sat down, Lyn trying to be polite and keeping a straight face. Zelda, in a white nightgown, caught Link's eye and rolled her own. Link tried to hold back laughter. More smashers piled in, and finally everyone had arrived. Link was very comfortable, Zelda next to him, and Marth on her other side. ("My guard," Zelda joked as, after Ganondorf and Wario went on an angry rampage after having their house of cards knocked down for the nineteenth time, Link and Marth jumped up to defend her.) Master Hand floated up to the front of the room, holding up a selection of DVDs.

"Hello, and I must say I'm glad you all came. Now, let's take a vote; who wants to watch an action/adventure movie?"

14 hands went up, including Link and Marth's.

"Okay, who wants to watch comedy?"

8 hands up, including Mario and Pit's.

"Classic?"

2 hands up, including Ike.

"Documentary?"

3 hands up, including Bowser Jr.

"Foreign?"

1 hand up, Luigi's.

"Horror?"

10 hands up, including Samus, Wolf, Krystal and Shadow. Luigi gave out a small yelp.

"Musical?"

7 hands up, including Captain Falcon, and K.K. Slider.

"Romance?"

4 hands up, including Peach and Bowser.

"And, finally, fantasy?"

6 hands up, including Kirby and Jigglypuff.

"Alright, it's settled. Action it is. How does everyone feel about _Robin Hood_?"

Mutters of agreement came from the crowd. Master Hand nodded to Crazy, who put the DVD in. Link watched as the opening credits rolled up. This was one of his personal favorites. He popped open a soda and gulped some of it down; Marth held out his hand and Link threw it to him. He grabbed it swiftly and chugged it down. He threw it back and passed it up to Ike, who took a swig. He burped and offered it to Lyn.

"Er-no thanks." Lyn said hastily to Ike, who shrugged and threw it down to Link as one of the king's deer was being poached. Zelda gave a small gasp when it was killed, but shook her head as if to clear it and stared determinedly back at the TV screen. Jigglypuff shivered, and K.K. held her hand for support, trying to remain cool but obviously disturbed as well.

The movie passed, with gasps and whoops from the other smashers. Link stared fixedly at the screen, watching Robin Hood's strategy in each sword fight. Mario and Luigi were cowering under the covers, while Peach was staring fixedly at the screen like Link, eyes unreadable. Zelda, who was learning how to swordfight from Link was also watching each battle particularly carefully, while Marth, noticing how Link was so absorbed in the movie, mentored Zelda, pointing out useful techniques as they fought. Ike was obviously frightened, but tried not to show it in front of Lyn, who looked less interested then Link, but absorbed in the movie all the same. Samus and Wolf were whooping and cheering each time a person died, bursting into applause after particularly gory deaths. Bowser and Meta Knight, however, where clinging to eachother, shivering, screaming each time something surprised them.

Finally, the final fight came. Link pulled himself away from the screen to grab a drink and take a swig. He turned to Marth to ask him if he wanted one, and found to his surprise he was clinging onto Zelda's hand. He let go sheepishly and caught the root beer. Link was amused; even Marth, a talented swordsman, got frightened by this scene. He watched as the ending credits rolled, and the lights flickered back on. Peach was silent, and then had an outburst. "Did you see that? That was totally AWESOME! One swift blow, he's dead! Mario, will you teach me how to do that-Mario?" She tapped the shivering figure under the covers. Mario crawled out, looking very pale.

"Ex-excuse me, princess…" Mario unsteadily walked out of the room, looking like he was going to be sick. Luigi climbed out from under the covers too, playing his DS. He waved to Kirby, who he was on PictoChat with. K.K. blushed and separated his hand from Jigglypuff, who smiled timidly back at him. Samus was pleading to Master Hand to let them watch a horror movie when everyone else left, while Wolf was crossing his fingers in the background. Zelda yawned, and so did Ike; Link found that he was tired too. He got up and stretched, and he and Marth picked up the cooler while Ike gathered up the blankets. Peach excitedly chattered to anyone who would listen about the fights, as Mario had still not come out of the bathroom. Link finally came to his room, where he took out the key and let Ike and Marth in. He turned to Zelda.

"'Night, princess. See you in the morning."

"See you in the morning," she agreed, yawning. She took out her key and let Lyndis and Peach into the room next door. She waved goodnight to him and shut the door behind her.

Link walked into the room to find that Ike was already snoring on the couch, while Marth was sitting upright in bed, looking bothered.

"What's up?" Link asked, sitting down at his feet. He knew when something was troubling his friend. "Stomach ache?"

"No, maybe a different organ." Marth said. "Nothing really. Go to sleep."

Link shot one last concerned look at him, and then nodded and climbed up to his bunk. He fell asleep almost before his head hit the pillow, and had dreams of swordfights, root beer and Robin Hood.

* * *

Bustman: Hey, sorry this is kind of short. See, I've already written the second chapter, and originally that and this were combined. But together they were 21 pages long on Microsoft Word, and I decided that was to long, so I split it. This was the only good place to do that. You can expect the next chapter on September 4th. Expect the next chapter out very soon. Anyways, I still hope you enjoyed, and I urge you to review.


	9. The Big Night

Bustman: Hey, back again. Sorry I broke my promise; my computer caught a bug, and I couldn't publish anything for a while. Excuse me if there are a few mistakes; the bug messed up the document. Anyways, I have another chapter ready for you guys!

Funky Kong: Alright!

Bustman: Hey, wait a second, you're not a character from the game!

Funky Kong: (shrugs) I know.

Bustman: (rolls his eyes) Right. Anyways, the disclaimer?

Funky Kong: Yo dudes, Bustman, who is the _man_, doesn't own any cat litter about the mojo called the recording industry.

Bustman: …Right. Anyways, I do not own anything, okay?

Funky Kong: Okay!

Bustman: That was a rhetorical question.

Funky Kong: (shrugs) I know.

Bustman: Anyways, please read and review!

* * *

Link woke up to the sound of birds chirping outside. Energy renewed, he jumped out of bed. Ike was still asleep, but Marth was blinking sleep out of his eyes, still in bed.

"You feeling better?" Link asked, question directed to Marth. Marth thoughtfully nodded.

"Yeah, a bit. Thanks for the concern," Marth tossed his legs out of bed and stretched. Link went into the bathroom to get changed, and came out to find a fully dressed Marth looking happier. Link grinned.

"Shall we go down to breakfast?" he asked. Marth nodded. The two lightly shut the door behind them, careful not to wake up Ike, and walked down to breakfast. Zelda, Bowser, Samus, Wolf and Meta Knight were already up, sipping tea. Link plopped down next to Zelda, and Marth sat across from him.

"Tonight's the big night, huh?" Zelda said, putting her spoon down. Link nodded, digging into some porridge. Marth smiled.

"Can't wait to see what Ike is going to wear."

"Neither can I," Link said, chuckling. "I'm sure he'll impress us."

"If we're lucky, maybe we can get him to wear his dinosaur pajamas."

"Oh, I do hope so."

"Guys," Zelda interrupted. "You really shouldn't talk behind Ike's back."

"So," Link said. "You think we should talk while he's within earshot?"

Zelda rolled her eyes, and Link grinned. "Kidding, kidding. Where are Peach and Lyn? They usually rise early with you."

"Oh," Zelda said, smiling. "Peach is out dress shopping, and she dragged Lyn with her. I was almost forced to come, but I said I was going to a romantic movie with you. Peach wouldn't dare interfere with someone's relationship unless it was to get her way."

"Right," Link said, puzzled. "But why dress shop at seven-thirty in the morning?""The early bird catches the worm, she says," Zelda shook her head. "But I'd rather catch the ants if it meant avoiding going out into the chilly morning air."

Luigi, Kirby, and Mario sat down at the table. "Where's Peach?" Mario asked, looking around.

"You can't guess?"

More people came down for breakfast in the next five minutes, and within ten the hall was filled with smashers, talking and laughing. Master Hand floated to the front of the room.

"I am sorry to say this, but we must return our ski and snowboarding equipment today," Master Hand said, frowning. "So, instead of going out on the slopes, I am giving you today to return your equipment and prepare for the party. We'll need volunteers to help me and Crazy set up and cook for the party, for the staff here will be busy seeing to the other guests. The party starts at 7:30, in the downstairs of the lodge. We'd like to remind you that attendance _is_ optional, but we hope that you all come. That is all," Master Hand floated away, leaving the smashers to erupt in chatter again.

"You going to help out with the preparations?" Marth asked Zelda and Link. Zelda nodded.

"I'm going to help set up the party. Knowing Peach, she won't be back until well after noon, so we need someone to help Master Hand get started on the preparations.""Cool. How about you, Link?" Marth said, looking in his direction. Link thought for a bit.

"Well, I guess I'll help cook. If it's only Crazy Hand in the kitchen, we won't have much of a dinner, now will we?"

"True, true. I'll help you, after I return my stuff," Marth said. Link nodded his head and pulled his chair away from the table, getting up and walking to the kitchen. Crazy Hand was outside, a chef's hat on. His eight monkeys were with him, all wearing aprons and rubber gloves. Mojo screeched with happiness as he saw Link and ran up his back, clinging on. Link smiled and turned to Crazy."I'm here to help with kitchen duty, sir."

"Ah, but do you know the password?" Crazy asked, cackling wildly. Link sighed."It's password, isn't it?"

"How'd you know?" Crazy asked, tossing him a chef hat. Link caught it and put it on, brushing the blonde hair out of his eyes. "You can assist Lucario with making the spaghetti and meatballs."

Link nodded curtly and swung open the doors. Crazy's monkeys followed him inside, running around the kitchen and getting cookbooks.

"They're surprisingly intelligent, for monkeys," Link said walking up to Lucario, who was crookedly wearing a white chef hat and boiling water. Lucario shrugged.

"_Not really. I'm telepathically telling them what to do._"

"Ah."Link took some frozen meatballs out of the freezer while Lucario dumped the spaghetti into the hot water. He left it there to defrost and took out a cookie sheet, remembering his grandmother's cookie recipe.

"_Good idea_," Lucario nodded. He psychically summoned all the ingredients for the cookies from the kitchen, and they all zoomed to the counter Link was standing in front of. Link thanked Lucario and began warming up the butter in the microwave."You're too slow!" shouted a familiar voice. Sonic dashed into the room, opened up the microwave, took out the butter, and breathed on it until it was soft.

"_Great, now the cookies will have your bad breath all over them_," Lucario said, as Sonic dropped the butter into the bowl. "_Now why don't you make yourself useful and cook up some lasagna_?"

Time passed, and the three smashers baked. Finally, the people who had rented their ski or snowboards returned to the lodge, and Lyn, Ike, Marth, Jigglypuff, Mario and Bowser joined them in the kitchen.

"Oi, Bowser, heat these up for me?" Link said, tossing him the still-frozen meatballs. Bowser breathed on them, melting all the frost. Link nodded his thanks and put them in the microwave. He heard a _bing_ and rushed over to the oven. Inside were warm, soft cookies.

"Ooh, those smell good," Marth said as he passed him, a tray of steaming pizza pillows in his hands. Link dumped them on a plate and put tinfoil on them, so the flies would not eat them. A monkey dashed up to the plate, grabbed it, and took it to the party room for him before Link could say thanks. He shrugged and started on the mashed potatoes.

At 2:30, Crazy told everyone to break. Link and Marth walked into the party room, only to be shoved away by Peach, in her usual pink dress.

"It's a surprise," she told them strictly, and walked back in. Link and Marth shared an exasperated glance, then walked up to the lounge.

"Yo, Link, Marth," Meta Knight said, holding a bunch of party balloons and stopping to talk with the two before he set them up in the party room. "How's kitchen duty?"

"Coming along pretty well. Everything smells great."

"That's good. Let's hope Kirby doesn't eat it all."

"Oh, no worries," Link warily grinned. "Zelda's put a charm on the food so it can't be sucked up. We'll be able to restrain Kirby from eating it all with his hands." Meta Knight smiled behind his mask.

"Cool. Gotta go. Good luck!" Meta Knight raced away, balloons in hand. Link and Marth got up and followed down after him, back into the kitchen. There was still food to be made.

* * *

"I'm going to die! Get it off! Get it off!" Wolf shouted, trying to pull off his tie. Shadow rolled his eyes, with a black tie on.

"Calm down, Wolf, it's only for a couple of hours."

"That's right.," K.K. said, wearing a black jacket and bowtie. "You don't have to endure it for long."

"At least I'm not dressed up like _him_," Wolf muttered, jerking his head over to Captain Falcon, who had on a red leather jacket, sunglasses, sideburns, a white shirt, jeans, a fancy leather belt, black shoes, cufflinks and both a bowtie and a tie ("I call it a bowtie-tie!" Captain Falcon had said, to general groans).

"Poyo!" Kirby said, with a polka-dotted tie on. Luigi, in a black suit and a black tie, rolled his eyes good-naturedly.

"How do I look?" Mario asked, a red leather jacket, white shirt and jeans on. Ike, in a black vest with a red bowtie, gave the thumbs up.

Link, in a light blue-buttoned shirt and white pants, got up from the chair he was sitting in. "Guys, is all this get-up necessary?"

"Yes," they all replied together. Link sighed. Maybe it hadn't been such a good idea to invite the boys to their room to get ready for the party. Marth, in the same clothes as Link only black pants instead of white, patted his shoulder.

"Come on dude, cheer up. This is the one night where we get a chance to dress up."

Link rolled his eyes. "Fine. We should get going; it's 7:20," Marth nodded in agreement, and Link put on a white jacket, while Marth put on a black. Link put on a white-water straw hat and marched out the door, followed by Marth, Ike, K.K., Luigi, Kirby, Bowser, Meta Knight, Mario, Pit, Wolf, Captain Falcon and Shadow. Crazy Hand waited for them by the stairs leading to the last floor of the lodge.

"Password?"Link rolled his eyes.

"Password."

"How'd you know?" Crazy checked their names off the list and let them down. He stopped in front of the beads hanging from the doorway. He turned to everyone."Alright, this is it. We're men; we've got to hang tough.""Agreed," Marth said seriously, and everyone else nodded. Link turned around, took a deep breath, and stepped through the beads into the room.

He was met with a blast of noise from the stereo beside him. He jumped back, surprised. His nose suddenly caught a whiff of something good; he turned around to see a long table filled with the goodies they had made. Link finally turned to the center of the room. A disco ball was hanging from the center, party balloons surrounding it. Sonic was dancing on the dance floor; or, more like running around in circles. A big screen behind him showed a battle between Fox and Isaac. Link's attention turned to two blonde women walking toward them; Mario and Wolf's jaws dropped. On the left was Samus, in a slate blue dress and her hair out of her usual ponytail, and on the right was Peach, her hair down as well, in a glittery blue dress and with blue earrings glimmering on her ear lobes.

"I-uh…princess?" Mario seemed faint. Peach giggled, kissed him on the cheek, and led him out onto the dance floor.

"Believe me, I didn't want to go in this dress. Peach forced me into it," Samus grumbled.

"B-b-b-but you look great!" Wolf stammered. Samus let a small smile creep onto her face. Wolf took her hand and led her out onto the dance floor. Marth gestured to the chairs by the dance floor, and the two sat down watching the new battle, which was Waluigi against King DeDeDe.

"Link," Master Hand said, floating up to the two veterans. "Glad you made it. You're up next for battle."

"Who against?"

"Oh, you'll see," Master Hand smiled and floated away. Link turned to Marth and shrugged.

"What do you think his deal was?"

"No idea," Marth shook his head as King DeDeDe propelled Waluigi off-screen with his hammer. The two walked out of the pain simulator, Waluigi rubbing the back of his head grumpily. Link got up and walked into the pain simulator past them. He evaporated and appeared again on the Bridge of Eldin.

READY…GO!

Link looked around. Who was he fighting? And then he saw her, on the other side of the bridge, smiling at him. Zelda was wearing a sky-blue dress, with sapphire earrings glimmering on her ears. She wore bracelets on her wrists, and her hair was down out of her usual braids. Link shook his head as if to clear something, and walked toward her, all attention focused on her…

And then he was hit in the chest. He staggered back, looking confused. Zelda grinned.

"This is a battle, remember? We aren't at the party anymore."

She created another Din's fire and aimed it at him, but Link was ready. He took out his shield, and it blew up against it. Link took out his claw shot and grabbed Zelda with it, pulling her to him.

"May I say, princess," Link breathed into her ear, as she writhed against the claw shot. "That you look magnificent this evening?"

"Only," Zelda said, teleporting behind him and breathing into his ear now. "If I may say the same for you."

Link turned and sliced his sword at her; however, she reflected it with Nayru's Love. She then swept down low with one of her legs, to try to trip Link, but Link jumped up out of the way. His hat nearly flew off; he had to grab it to steady it.

"Why don't you wear that hat more often?" Zelda asked, grinning. "I like it.""You really think so?" Link asked, smiling as he used his boomerang, which Zelda sidestepped. The boomerang came back around and hit her in the head."Okay," she growled playfully. "Enough fun and games."

"If you haven't noticed, princess," Link grinned, "this _is_ a game."Zelda stifled back laughter as she grabbed Link and threw him. Still in the air, he took out his boomerang again and threw it, and it hit Zelda in the head again. Zelda pulled out Din's fire and quickly aimed it at Link, letting it go. Having just landed, Link was unprepared, and let it hit him. He ran towards her, and she ran towards him. Link's sword collided with her fist, bursting with magical energy. They both skidded back. Suddenly, King Bulbin rode onto the stage. Link jumped up to avoid him, but Zelda was hit by the horse and landed on the ground, as the king dropped a bomb.

"Zelda?" Link asked timidly, walking over to Zelda, who hadn't gotten up yet. He bent down, confused.And then suddenly, Zelda grabbed him, a playful glint in her eye.

"You underestimated me. Au Revoir."

She gave him a swift kiss on the cheek, and threw him into the bomb. GAME!

Link walked out of the pain simulator, smiling. He held out his hand, and Zelda shook it.

"Good game, Zels. I'm going to get some water; be back in a couple of minutes." Link walked over to the water table, where he struck up a conversation with Bowser, who was holding a glass of punch. Zelda smiled and sat down, watching Mario and Peach, and Wolf and Samus dance.

"Er, princess? Would you like to dance?"

Zelda looked up to see Marth rocking on his heels in front of her. She smiled. "Sure, Marth, I'd love to."

Marth smiled, grabbed her hand and whirled her onto the dance floor. He grabbed her two hands, and pulled her back against his chest, and the two rocked back and forth as the music played slowly.

"May I cut in?"

Link was suddenly there beside them, after watching them dance one song. Marth nodded respectfully, gave Zelda a swift kiss on the cheek, and walked off to the sidelines again.

"Marth a good dancer?" Link asked, taking her hand. "I personally wouldn't care to be held against his chest, but hey, my opinion," he laughed, and Zelda grinned back. "Ah, yes, laugh while you can…" A shadowy figure said from the balcony. "Little do you know this happy love story is about to become all too complicated…Muah ha ha ha ha!"

"Mua ha ha ha ha!" "Crazy, what are you doing here?" the shadowy figure said, turning to Crazy Hand, who was cackling wildly with him. He shrugged.

"I'm drawn like a magnet to insanity!"

"Who're you calling insane?"

"Sorry, Bustman, didn't mean it like that."

"Good. Join me as I evilly laugh," Bustman said, irritated.

"Muah ha ha ha ha!"

"Muah ha ha ha ha!"

"Muah ha ha ha ha!"

"Hey," Bustman said, turning to Fox. "Why are you here? I thought this was supposed to be an abandoned balcony?"

"Nah, you're standing in front of the boy's bathroom," Fox shrugged, pointing behind him. Bustman turned to find a hall leading to the restroom, from which Falco was emerging. He raised a feather, toilet paper on his foot. Bustman slapped his head and turned back.

"Very well. All of you, join me in my evil laughter!"

"Muah ha ha ha!"

"Muah ha ha ha!"

"Muah ha ha ha!"

"Muah ha ha ha!"

"Should we get going?" Link whispered to Zelda, after another song finished. She nodded, smiling. The two began to walk to the exit when Master Hand tapped Link's shoulder.

"Excuse me, Link? You've been requested for a battle."

"Oh, okay. Well," he said, turning to the princess and smiling. "Guess I'll see you in the morning."

"See you in the morning," she agreed, as Link and Master Hand headed to the pain simulators. She walked out of the doorway, only to feel a hand clamp around her arm, and pull her to the left. She turned to face the person who had grabbed her and came face to face with Marth.

"Hello, princess."

"Oh, hi, Marth," Zelda said uneasily. "Uh…what's new?"

"Come on, I want to show you something. Where's Link?"

"Battling."

"Oh, okay. Follow me."

Marth ran down the hall and beckoned to her. Zelda shrugged, and followed the caped prince. He opened a door, which led to a narrow hallway. He grabbed a lantern and began to walk down it.

"I was looking for the boy's bathroom," he explained, walking down the passageway. "When I opened that door and saw this passage. Curiosity got the best of me, and I went down it. When I got here," he said, stopping at a dead end. "I thought it was weird that a hallway would just lead to a dead end, so I started to investigate. And I found this."

He pushed a rock jutting out from the brown, grimy wall. A door, which had camouflaged perfectly into the wall, slid open. Underneath was a fountain, with a small waterfall trickling from the ceiling into a clear pool. Zelda gasped in astonishment.

"It's beautiful. Where is the water coming from?"

"I figure we must be directly below the moat, and I'm guessing it came from there. Pretty cool, huh?"

"It's amazing," Zelda said, her mouth twitching up. The two stared at it for a while, until Zelda shook her head.

"Thank you for showing me this place, Marth. It's fantastic. I'll make sure to show Link."

"No problem. It's no fun to bask in the beauty alone. I enjoy spending time with you, Zelda; maybe we can meet up another time. Just as friends," he added hastily. Zelda nodded her head slowly.

"We'll see. Good night, Marth."

"Good night, princess."

* * *

Bustman: Did I just go evil on you? Yes, I did indeed. And when I go evil, that means something bad is going to happen.

Funky Kong: Dude, why do you have to be so cruel to the smashers?

Bustman: To keep the readers amused! Duh! Anyways, as always, I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and the next will be up soon. Toodles! R&R!


	10. Life Begins

Bustman: Hey, back again, with a new, rocking chapter!

Zelda: (Looks down at writing) You're making the smashers go to the grocery store?

Bustman: Shhh! You'll ruin the surprise. Anyways, don't you have a disclaimer to do?

Zelda: (Sighs) Bustman does not own anything related to Super Smash Bros.. All characters belong to their respective owners.

Bustman: Very good, Zelda. Read and review!

* * *

The smashers walked up to the large mansion, which they now called home. Master Hand took a key and unlocked the door, and the smashers raced in, heading straight for the kitchen. Crazy Hand followed, licking his lips. Master Hand sighed.

"Well, I guess it's just you and me, Mojo."

The small monkey chattered and followed his owner. Master Hand rolled his eyes and stuffed the keys away. The smashers came out of the kitchen, gravy, crumbs and mashed potatoes on their faces.

"Well, as you all know, this is now your home," Master Hand began. "Let me go over your daily schedules. Tomorrow, you will go to Cranky Kong, Mewtwo, Crazy and I to discuss your moveset. We will be in the counselors office at that time. The next day, we're going to have you come in again, and show us your agility and flexibility, and all the stuff we're going to need to create digital copies of you that the people will be playing. The next day all of us smashers will have a meeting discussing the next game, and the day after _that _we will have a press conference, and then you have the weekend off. Understood?"

"Yes." The smashers said together. Master Hand smiled. "Great. I'm giving you a couple hours to settle back in, then all of you and Crazy Hand are going to go to the supermarket. I'll be working here while you guys are out. Then we'll have dinner, and then I'm going to make an announcement. Now go up to your rooms and unpack."

"A trip to the supermarket with Crazy? I don't know if that's Master Hand's smartest idea…" Marth whispered to Link, who nodded. Link took out a key and unlocked the door to their room. Ike yawned and plopped down on the couch. Link looked around their room, which was much different from their one in the ski lodge. Three beds were lined up against the wall, a nightstand beside each one. They had a view of the forest beside the mansion from their window, and a tree was standing outside of it, leaves stirring in the wind. A TV faced the three beds, with a desk right below it. The bathroom stood next to Ike's bed, and beside it was the door leading out of the room. It was bigger then most of the smasher's rooms, and it was very cozy. Link sat down on his bed, which was nearest the window. He stayed there for a minute, letting the warm sunbeams shine onto his back.

"So guys, what do you want to do? We have a gym downstairs, a swimming pool outside, and an amusement park 10 miles away." Ike said, looking at the two. "Not to mention the ping-pong table, the pool table, a lounge, a baseball diamond and a tennis court."

Link laughed. "Gee, there doesn't seem like much to do. Let's go down to the gym. Catch a basketball game."

Marth shrugged and nodded. They went down the stairs all the way to the bottom, where they went into the gymnasium. Bowser, Meta Knight, Diddy Kong, Shadow and Samus were talking to Luigi and Mario, both of whom were holding a basketball in their hands.

"There are our last three players!" Mario beamed, turning to the swordsmen. "All right, now we have even teams. Why don't me, Link, Meta Knight, Diddy Kong and Marth be on one team, and you can have Ike, Samus, Shadow and Bowser?"

"Okay," Luigi shrugged, tossing his basketball over his shoulder. He ran over to the hoop farthest from the door, and Mario jogged down onto the opposite side.

"Huddle!" Mario called, beckoning to his teammates. The four ran over to Mario.

"Okay, here's the plan. I'll run it down and pass to Meta Knight. Meta Knight, I want you to fake pass to me, but pass to Link, who'll be down by the basket for a shot. Sound good?"

"Yeah," Link said. "But maybe Meta Knight should pass to Diddy Kong, who can zip around all the other players to the opposite side of the basket. Then he can pass to me, and I can make the shot."

"Okay," Mario said. He put his hand in the middle. Link clamped his own over Mario's followed by Diddy Kong, Marth and Meta Knight.

"Red Thunder!"

"Green Lightning!" The chant came from the other side of the court. Luigi's team got into defensive positions and beckoned to Mario's tauntingly. Mario ran his team down, stopping face to face with Luigi. He shot through his brothers legs to Meta Knight, who grabbed it. Unfortunately, Samus stole it from his loose grip. She passed it to Luigi, but Diddy Kong jumped in the way and grabbed the ball. He dribbled down the court, dodging around the opposing team. He quickly bounce passed to Link, who jumped up and made the shot. He punched his fist into the air as his team cheered. They ran back to their side of the court, getting in position. Luigi passed to Shadow, who ripped down to the basket and shot it. Marth jumped up and slammed the ball down, but Bowser grabbed it and aimed for the shot. Link nodded to Meta Knight and held his hands out. Meta Knight hopped up onto them and jumped up as Bowser shot the ball. In midair, he grabbed the ball, and glided over to the other basket, making the shot.

"Travel!" Ike said, gesturing to Meta Knight, who was walking back with the basketball in hand.

"Technically, it's not." Meta Knight said, coming up to the other team. "Traveling means that I took two steps without dribbling the ball; but I didn't take any steps."

"That's cheap!"

"You don't call Shadow's speed cheap?" Link retorted back. Luigi shook his head.

"Team, drop it. It's their basket. There's nothing in the rules that says you can't glide during basketball. The score is 4-0. We're playing to 12."

Luigi dribbled up to Mario again, this time passing it to Samus. She dribbled into the key, and then quickly passed to Ike. He shot it but missed, but Luigi ran up and Alley-Ooped it, putting the score 4-2. Mario took the ball and ran back to the other side of the court. He passed to Link, who dribbled it near the basket and passed to Marth, who took the shot. It looked like it was about to go in, but Samus jumped up and tipped it, so it missed. She grabbed the ball and passed to Luigi. Luigi ran it back down, and passed it to Bowser, who shot for three points. It went straight into the basket, putting their team in the lead.

"Even if Bowser isn't very fast, he sure can shoot," Mario said, dribbling down the court. He passed to Meta Knight, who dribbled back and shot to Marth, who was open. He dribbled it down to the lower part of the key, and passed to Diddy Kong, who was in the center. The short monkey bounded up and slammed the ball into the basket, making the score 6-5.

"Time!" Luigi called, and his teammates went off the court, getting water and gulping it down. Mario ran his team back.

"Good job everybody. Looks like we have an audience now." Mario took a bottle of water and nodded to the bleachers. Link turned his head and saw many of the smashers were watching, including Master Hand and Crazy Hand. Link grinned and grabbed a water, swigging it down. Luigi ran back onto the court.

"Ready?" he called to the other team. Mario nodded, and they took defensive positions. Luigi ran the ball up, and passed it to Ike, who dribbled the ball down. He passed to Samus, who bent down and shot the ball. It bounced off the backboard and went into the hoop.

Mario took the ball and ran it back down the court. He passed to Meta Knight, who passed to Marth. Marth dribbled it over and passed to Link. He prepared to shoot, but Shadow ran over to try to block the ball. Instead of doing this, however, he knocked into Link, who nearly lost his balance.

"Sorry 'bout that." Shadow said, steadying Link.

"Foul!" Mario shouted. Luigi nodded. "Two free shots!"

Link dribbled up to the key. He focused on the net, and shot the ball. It bounced off the rim into the basket. Marth high-fived him from the side of the key. Link dribbled the ball again and shot it. It bounced off the rim again, but this time away from the basket. Marth jumped up and tapped the ball back in, putting the score to 9-7. Luigi grabbed the ball and dribbled it down. He passed to Shadow, who passed to Bowser. Bowser shot for three points again, and made the shot.

"Time!" Mario called. Luigi shrugged and ran his team back. Mario brought his teammates in for a huddle.

"Okay, the score is 9-10. If they get one more basket, we're done for. Let's try to get a three pointer. I'm going to pass to Meta Knight, who will fake to Link and pass to Marth, who will pass back to me. I'll shoot from behind the three point line. Agreed?" General murmurs of agreement came from the team. "Okay. Let's go."

Mario gestured to Luigi, who passed the ball to him. Mario ran down and passed to Meta Knight. He faked to Link, but passed to Marth. Unfortunately, Luigi dived in the way, and began to dribble back down. Link reached in and stole the ball back, and passed to Mario. Mario gritted his teeth, aimed and fired. The ball went into the net cleanly.

"Oh, yeah!" Mario shouted, punching his fist into the air. "We won! 12-10! We won!"

"Good job, bro." Luigi held his hand out. Mario shook it.

"It was a good game."

"It was." Luigi said, grinning. Link, smiling, sat down on a bench and swigged down some water. All of the smashers in the bleachers were clapping. Master Hand was staring intently on the court, pondering something. He shook his head and turned to Crazy, who was playing with Mojo. Link slapped Mario's hand.

"Nice shot. You won us the game."

"Couldn't have done it if you hadn't stole the ball."

Link grinned and high fived Marth, who was right behind him.

"Attention, smashers!" Master Hand called. The people in the bleachers and the people on the basketball court turned to Master Hand. "As you all know, we need to stock up on food, so I want you guys and Crazy to go to the market. Meet by the door in 10 minutes."

Link nodded and beckoned to Marth and Ike. The three walked up the stairs.

"You guys played well," Ike said, reaching the door. "I thought we had the game in a bag after those two shots from Bowser."

"I did too. It was a close game," Link laughed. He walked into the room and grabbed a soda. He unscrewed the cap and swigged it down. He looked around.

"Anyone want some?"

"I'm good," Marth shrugged. Ike nodded in agreement.

"Alright then. I'm taking a quick shower." Link grabbed a towel and went into the bathroom. Marth turned to Ike

"So…how about those Knicks?"

* * *

"And that makes 55," Master Hand said, counting. All of the smashers were gathered near the door of the mansion. He turned to Crazy and gave him a credit card. "You're limit is 700, hear?"

Crazy nodded as Mojo screeched on his back. Crazy beckoned to the smashers, and they went outside, where a fountain was spraying water. On the driveway was a bus, and the smashers piled into it.

"Where are you going?" Kapp'n, at the wheel of the bus, asked Crazy.

"The market."

"All righty then," The Animal Crossing character took off, driving down the street. The back was unusually quiet.

"Why is it so quiet? It's Road Trip Song Day! Everybody, sing with me! There once was a farmer, he had a dog, and Bingo was his name-o…"

Link smiled, rolling his eyes and joining into the chorus of 'B-I-N-G-O. Marth chuckled and joined him.

"And Bingo was his name-o!" Crazy finished, as the bus pulled up at the market.

"We get off here," Kapp'n said. The smashers got off the bus and grabbed a few shopping carts.

"Alright," Crazy said, looking at the lines of shelves holding food. "Let's do this aisle by aisle." Crazy floated toward aisle one. The smashers shrugged and followed.

"Okay, we definitely need waffles." Crazy said, grabbing the waffles and dumping them in the cart.

"And syrup!" Louie said, licking his lips.

"How about some ice cream?" The Ice Climbers said together, dumping the frozen treat in the cart.

"Let's get some rocking Brussels sprouts!"

Everyone turned to Captain Falcon, who was holding up some greens. Samus sighed, took out her plasma whip and chased after Captain Falcon, who screamed in terror.

The smashers walked down aisle after aisle, until the shopping cart was full. They walked to the front.

"Excuse me, sir, you seem like you have a lot of food there," Crazy turned to find a man with slick black hair and sunglasses on, who was smiling at him.

"So?"

"So, do you know you'd have to add all that food together to get the nutrition of one jellybean? Yes, that's right, jellybeans!" he said, grinning. "So why buy all that junk when you can buy the equivalent in jellybeans?"

"Sounds like a good deal," Crazy pondered. The man grinned.

"If you buy them now, I'll throw in an extra payment of 30 dollars!"

"It's a deal!" Crazy cried, hugging the man.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN, YOU ONLY BOUGHT JELLYBEANS!!"

"It was Bowser and Meta Knight's idea," Crazy whimpered, shrinking back. Master Hand, pure red, turned to Bowser and Meta Knight.

"You two are going to pay in the chamber!"

"What! No!!" Bowser and Meta Knight cried together. "We didn't do it!"

"What, you think a smart, sensible, insane hand like me would buy 120 packs of jellybeans?" Crazy asked.

Master Hand nodded sternly to the two smashers, who, cursing under their breaths, went down to the chamber. Master Hand turned to the smashers. "Well, it looks like we'll only be eating jellybeans for a couple of weeks."

"Awwwwwww!"

"I told you we should have gotten the Brussels sprouts!"

Master Hand shook his head. "Everybody go to the cafeteria. You're jellybeans will be served shortly."

"Well, this officially sucks," Marth said to Link as they sat down. Amy Rose brought out two plates of jellybeans and sat them down in front of the two. Link sighed, and dug his spoon into the jellybeans. Once everyone couldn't eat anymore, Master Hand floated up to the front of the room.

"Everybody gather in the hall. I have to make an announcement," Master Hand said. Everybody, glad to be dismissed, pushed their jellybeans away and walked into the hall. Master Hand floated up to the front of the room.

"The first thing I'd like to do today is welcome you to the making of Super Smash Bros. Fray. From this day on, the videogame is officially in development. It will be hard, busy work, but I assume we will all have fun in the making of it. And while we are making it," Master Hand paused. "I have signed us up for the Nintendo Sports Association."

"The NSA?"

"Seriously?"

"Awesome!"

"Silly rabbit! Trix are for kids!"

"Yes," Master Hand said, smiling. "We will have a basketball team, a tennis team, a baseball team and a soccer team. You are free to sign up for any of these; the first game starts in 8 days. You will have practices thrice a week if you do decide to sign up. Anyways," he said, switching to a different subject. "Let's go over our schedule for the year. Crazy?"

Crazy pulled down a large screen, and projected a page with calendars from October to July on them. Master Hand cleared his throat.

"As you know, today is October 24. We will be working on the game for the rest of the month, but you have Halloween off, as you do other holidays. In November, we'll really start getting down to work. Tons of conferences and digital adapting. Not to mention writing the adventure mode plot, and scouting to find stage locations. Soccer season also begins on the first. On Thanksgiving, however, you get a break. There will be no work this day, and we will be having a thanksgiving dinner here at the mansion. If you wish, you may bring others not from the mansion that are close to you. Now, moving on to December.."

"Christmas Carols!" Crazy said happily from the back. Master Hand clucked his tongue.

"…Yes, anyway, more digital adapting, and artists will come in to draw your official art for the game. Soccer season ends and basketball season begins. Hopefully, near the end of the month, we'll begin filming the adventure mode. You have the Christmas and New Years week off. We will be going to a large party on Christmas Eve, sponsored by Nintendo. Now, moving onto January."

Master Hand gestured to the next calendar.

"It will be a very busy month. We have a trailer for the game to create, more conferences, and filming for the adventure mode, as well as recruiting actors for them. In February, we're cut a bit of slack. The digital adaptations of the smashers will be sent to places where they will begin to put the game together. All we have to do is film some more of the adventure mode, and make some decisions, like how much damage your attacks will do, what your taunts look like, and all that stuff. Basketball season ends and baseball season begins. Got it?"

The smashers nodded, looking at the screen.

"In March, we will hopefully finish filming the adventure mode. It will then be sent to editors, where they will piece it together. We will then begin to focus on the other 1-player modes, such as Classic and Multi-Man. Near the middle of the month, baseball season ends and tennis season begins. We then move on to April, where we will put the final touches on the game. Near the end of April, we will be going on a trip to the beach."

"So that's where it ends?" Wolf asked, looking up at Master Hand. He shook his head.

"No. During May and some of June, you will be going around the world, promoting the game. Then we'll return to Smash Mansion. You are officially dismissed on July 5th."

"So we're going to be here for roughly 8 months?" Luigi asked, counting his fingers. Master Hand nodded.

"Yes, Luigi. 8 months. Everybody got that? Good. You are all dismissed."

* * *

Bustman: So, what'd you think? We're finally getting down to business. The smashers are going to be very busy from here on out. Anyways, _please _ review. Please! Whether you have a fanfiction account or not, I accept either. You have no idea how happy they make me. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed!


	11. Soccer Tryouts

Bustman: The great Bustman strikes again!

Wario: More like misses again.

Bustman: Oh, what do you know? Anways, don't you have a disclaimer to do?

Wario: Oh, yeah. Bustman does not own anything. Now where's my money?

Bustman: Right off that cliff.

(Wario jumps off a cliff and screams. Bustman gives a satisfied smile.)

Bustman: Good, we got rid of him. Read and review!

* * *

Link rubbed sleep out of his eyes. The sun shone in through the window, blinding Link temporarily. He sighed and got out of bed. He kicked Marth's mattress.

"Time to get up. Marth. Marth!"

Marth sighed and got up. He looked around and yawned.

"What time is it?"

"7:30. We're going to be late for breakfast; come on."

Link left the blue haired prince to get out of bed while he threw some fresh clothes on. He grabbed his toothbrush, and rinsed. He ran out to find Marth already dressed.

"Ike already up?"

"I suppose so. He should've woken us."

The two friends walked out the door and headed down to the cafeteria. They bumped into Olimar on the way there, surrounded by his pikmin, all nibbling on bacon bits.

"Hey, have you guys heard?" Olimar asked, giving his yellow pikmin another small piece of bacon. "The sports team tryouts are on the bulletin boards. They're later today. Crazy Hand is also handing out our schedules."

"Really?"

This interested Link. He walked over to the bulletin board, where Mario was signing his name on something.

"There!" he said, finishing his O. "All signed up for soccer. Oh, hey Link. Signing up?"

Link pondered this. He had played soccer with his friends in Ordon Village when he was a kid. He had been one of the best in the game. It might be fun to try out soccer again.

"Sure," he decided, grabbing a pencil. He wrote Link on the piece of paper. Mario gave a satisfied nod and walked away.

"Link! There you are!"

Link turned as Crazy Hand floated up to him, holding schedules. He rummaged through his papers and pulled out a beefy packet. Link gasped as Crazy dropped it into his hands.

"Is this my schedule for the whole year?" Link wheezed. Crazy happily nodded.

"Yup! You're required to carry that every day!" Crazy Hand said happily. He floated away. Link sighed and flipped to the first page. Link scanned it. In approximately 2 hours he was supposed to meet with Crazy Hand and Master Hand to discuss his moveset.

"Yo!"

Luigi and Ike had caught up with Marth, and all three of them were now walking towards him. They were all holding schedules as well. Link nodded his head in acknowledgement.

"What's that?" Luigi asked, gesturing to the sports tryout sheet.

"Sign-up for soccer. Tryouts begin at 12:30." Link said.

"Sounds cool. I just did a soccer videogame. I'll sign up," Luigi shrugged and scribbled his name on the board.

"Count me in. I was a player on a soccer team in Altea."

"Oh, really?" Luigi asked. "What happened?"

"We, uh, lost every game of the season," Marth sheepishly said as he scratched the back of his neck. "But I've gotten loads better."

He scribbled his name on the sheet.

"Count me out," Ike said. "I can't kick a soccer ball for my life."

"Oh, really? Bustman can't either," Fox said, walking up. Falco coughed.

"_Fourth wall…_"

"Oh, right." Fox shook his head and scribbled his name on the board as Link, Luigi, Marth and Ike walked down to the cafeteria. They sat down, and Amy Rose walked up, four plates of jellybeans in hand.

"Ugh," Marth scrunched up his face. "What I'd give for a couple of pancakes right now. Is there a waffle house anywhere near here?"

"It's a five minute drive," Link said, trying not to gag as he swallowed his jellybeans. He took a blue one and looked at it. "These aren't even jellybeans!" he grabbed his sword and split it open. Grey goo oozed out.

"I think I'm going to be sick…" Luigi clutched his stomach.

"I know," Ike said. He tossed his jellybeans to Kirby, who immediately sucked them up happily. The other three followed suit.

"Well," Marth grumbled. "I've lost my appetite."

"Excuse me," Luigi said, almost as green as his suit. He got up and ran to the bathroom.

"Well," Link sighed. "Let's just leave it at this; I hope Master Hand has hired a janitor."

* * *

Link and Ike were playing pong when Marth walked in, a smile planted on his face.

"What?" they asked together.

"My discussion with Master Hand and Crazy Hand went well. My Dancing Blade move is going to give me more of a horizontal boost, and my Dolphin Slash is going to do more damage."

"Cool," Link said, looking at the time. It was 9:25. He got up and brushed himself.

"You want to take over for me?"

"Sure," Marth said, taking Link's seat. Link walked out of the room, and made a left. He walked down a large hallway until he finally turned to two black swinging doors. Link walked in.

Crazy Hand, Master Hand, Cranky Kong and Mewtwo stared at him. Link took a seat, and Master Hand cleared his throat.

"Link, we have decided to cut you from the game."

"What?" Link said, surprised. Master Hand smiled.

"No, I'm kidding, I'm kidding. I do that to everyone who walks in here."

"_Link._"

Link turned to the ex-smasher, Mewtwo. Mewtwo cleared his throat.

"_Link, I want a truthful answer. If you don't give me one, I will know. How do you think you compare against the other smashers?_"

Mewtwo chuckled as Link hesitated. "_Don't worry, this information will be kept completely confidential._"

"Bah, confidentiality!" Cranky Kong scoffed. "Back in my day, we had no secrets. Yesiree, those were the good old days. If someone kept a secret, we would dunk their heads in the outhouse until they coughed it up."

"Yeah, those were the good old days. I enjoyed the part where you got to flush them," Crazy Hand said happily. Mojo screeched.

"Shh!" Master Hand turned to the monkey and the leftie. He turned back to Link. "So, Link?"

Link gulped. "I think I am a worthy opponent. I have many weapons to fight from a distance, and have many close-combat options as well. I have trained in the art of sword-fighting all my life, so I can land hard blows, as well as block them. I cannot run very fast or recover very well with all my equipment weighing me down, but my swiftness with the sword makes up for it."

"Yes…" Master Hand nodded thoughtfully. "You have proved yourself to be a very good fighter in the past. You are humble and noble, and are willing to protect anyone close to you with your life. You have found a friend in almost every smasher in the mansion. You are a valuable character, Link."

Link blushed. Master Hand continued.

"Let's go over your moveset. What do you think would be good changes within your ability?"

"Well," Link mulled this over for a bit. "I think my Spin Attack could bring me a bit of a higher distance. I've been training especially hard on that move in the time between this and brawl, and think it is doable."

Master Hand nodded and scribbled something down on his clipboard.

"Go on."

"I think my chain-shot could have a bit less lag," Link thought aloud. "A close friend of mine got me a new, faster one for my birthday, so Super Smash Bros. wouldn't have to supply me with one."

"I see," murmured Master Hand. He put the clipboard down. "Now Link, there is something very vital I need to share with you. You will no longer have your down-B move."

"What?" Link asked, looking at his bombs. "Why not? They're top quality."

Master Hand shook his head. "Something will be replacing it. Toon Link will be keeping his. Tell me, Link, are you familiar with this?" he held up a picture of a wolf with a goblin on his back, snarling, fur spiked and bloody and muscles rippling beneath his pelt. Link let out a small gasp.

"Wolf Link…" Link's voice trailed off. Master Hand nodded.

"Yes, Link. During battle, the player will be able to switch from you to your wolf form by pressing Down-B."

"You mean, like Zelda transforming into Shiek?"

"Precisely," Master Hand nodded vigorously. He laid the picture back down.

"Toon Link won't have a wolf form?"

"No," Master Hand shook his head. "We discussed it, but we decided if the player wanted to use the classic Link's moveset, they could use the other you."

Link stared at the picture. "Midna will be riding on my back? How? She is no longer in that form."

Crazy Hand answered this time. "Oh, she won't really be riding on your back. We'll digitally add that later."

Master Hand cut in. "Let's go over your moveset. Your B attack will be called _Shadow Circle_. It takes a while to spread out, but when you release B every character caught in it will be attacked by you. Your B-side is called _Twilight Shield_. Midna will form a dark shield around you, which will reflect projectiles. It will, however, shatter if it is hit by physical attacks or explosives. Understand?"

Link nodded.

"Your B-Up will be called _Midna's Guidance_. The player taps the control stick in the direction he wants Midna to float up three different times. You will follow Midna wherever she goes. And your B-down, of course, will be _Transform_. Got it?"

Link nodded again. Master Hand smiled.

"Good. Without the extra weight of the bombs carrying you down, you'll be able to do a much higher spin attack."

"I suppose," Link pondered this. He nodded. "I think two alternate forms could be good for my game."

Master Hand nodded. "Good. Now that we've got that out of the way, let's get to your personal life at the mansion."

"What?" Link asked. "I thought this was just supposed to be about my moveset!"

"_This is for future guidance for the counselors_," Mewtwo said. Master Hand cleared his throat and flipped a page on his clipboard open. He looked up.

"You seem to be particularly close to a Miss Zelda, a Mr. Marth and a Mr. Ike. Can you tell us about your relationships with them?"

Link gulped. "Well, Ike is a good friend of mine. He is easy to get along with, and very trustworthy." _And very gullible_, Link thought. He coughed and continued. "Marth is one of my best friends in the mansion. He's very cheerful, and we do almost everything together. We are able to communicate very well, and we think very much alike."

"And Miss Zelda?" Master Hand pressed. Link hesitated.

"Zelda is my other best friend in the mansion. We have known each other since we were very young. I see her often, as I am the head of security at the castle. Many of the same things that interest me interest her. She is kind and generous. She is very special to me."

Master Hand gave the tiniest of nods, and jotted a few notes down on his clipboard. "I see. Well, it seems our session is over. I bid you good day."

"Good day to you too, sir."

And with that, Link walked out.

* * *

"Nervous?" Link asked, taking a swig of water. Marth, who was shaking beside him, shrugged uneasily.

"Kind of. It's been a while since I played soccer."

"Relax," Luigi said, laying his arms back against the dugout of the field. "I'm sure all three of us will make the cut."

"Alright, everybody, come on out!" a voice from outside the dugout called. Link, Marth and Luigi stood up and walked out. Funky Kong was standing in the center of the field, a soccer ball in hand. Other smashers were surrounding him, all looking very nervous.

"Alright, dudes," Funky Kong began. "So let's get down to the point, man. Only 14 of you will make it on the team, 3 as substitutes. There are 28 of you here today. 14 won't make the cut."

Link heard Marth gulp.

"This tryout will be divided into three sections. First, I will see your dribbling and controlling skills by having you run the ball through a groovy obstacle course I set up. Then, I will play goalie, and you will try to shoot past me. And after that, I will pit you against each other in a soccer game, dawgs! Sound cool?"

"You know it, cat's pajamas!" Captain Falcon said.

"Good. The obstacle course is over there."

Link looked over to where Funky Kong was pointing. He gulped.

"Now, you start out by dribbling across a wooden, unsteady bridge over a cliff!" Funky Kong said happily. "Then, you have to jump through a fan with razor sharp blades, keeping the ball in control. Then you have to make your way through a hedge maze, and then jump through a ring of fire, where you will shoot into a goal. Got it?"

"Got it!"

"Got it!"

"Got it!"

"Got milk?"

"Good," Funky Kong nodded. "Let's see, hmmm, why don't we have the boy in the green tunic go first?"

_Crap._

Link took a deep breath and dribbled the ball up to the bridge. It was wobbling over a large cliff. He sighed.

"Why haven't I ever seen_ this _before?"

He began to dribble across the bridge, trying to keep light as a feather. He tucked the ball in between his two feet and jumped over a gap in the bridge, and then continued until he was over on the other side. He sighed, and looked at the fan. It was whirling rather fast. How in hell was he supposed to jump through?

Suddenly, an idea sparked in his head. He kicked the ball straight into the fan. The ball jammed the fan, and Link jumped through, knocking the ball back out as he landed. He sighed and looked at the maze ahead of him.

"Boy! You've got the Shining!" A mysterious old man called from the hedge. Link rolled his eyes.

"Oh, shut up."

Link dribbled the ball through the entrance, and turned his head as he saw a fork in the path, considering which way was best to go.

_Hey, wait a second…_

Three minutes later Link emerged from the maze, having cut through all the hedges. The mysterious old groundskeeper looked at Link.

"Boy, you've got some fancy sword work there. Be useful when your papa go crazy on you…"

Link sighed and dribbled ahead. The temperature rose as he got closer to the ring of fire. He stopped a few yards away from it.

"Here goes nothing… and everything…"

Link dribbled the ball up two yards, tucked the ball between his ankles and jumped through the ring of fire. He did a backflip in midair and released the ball, which went straight into the goal. The smashers cheered loudly as Link dribbled back.

"Good work, yo! Although you won't be allowed a sword in soccer…"

"There are no hedge mazes in soccer either. Or creepy groundskeepers," Link replied coolly.

"Good point, good point…next!"

Bowser went next. He dribbled up to the bridge, and his weight immediately collapsed it. Bowser ungracefully struggled back up and slowly advanced forward, tiptoeing and tapping the ball lightly. He breathed fire out at the fan, but instead of melting as intended, it caught on fire as Bowser tried to jump through.

"Stop, drop and roll, Bowser! That's right, baby! You're on fire!" Funky Kong shouted as Bowser rolled around on the ground, screaming. He got up and ran through the hedge maze, lighting all of the shrubs on fire. He then ungracefully tumbled through the ring of fire, and ran straight into the goal, knocking it over.

"How'd I do?" he panted, as he walked back up to Funky Kong.

"Dawg, that wasn't even half good! Whatcha doing here, Bowser?" Funky Kong said, jotting some notes on his clipboard.

"Just my luck," Bowser snorted. Suddenly an arwing flew in and bowled him over. Fox and Falco emerged, arguing as usual.

"I told you we should have taken the Ferrari!"

"Oh, shut up, you feathered dumbbell!"

The chaos continued for another hour as smasher after smasher went. Finally Luigi returned, dribbling the ball back after an exceptional jump through the ring of fire.

"That was awesome, dawg! That was like the jitterbug on the flipflop, yo!"

"Er-thanks?"

"Alright, dudes. Now we's gonna make some goals! Who wants to go first?"

"I will," Samus replied huskily. Funky Kong smiled.

"Good. You have five shots," Funky Kong walked over to the goal and leaned down. "Shoot."

Samus kicked the ball with her heel. It went all the way over to the left side of the goal, but Funky Kong made a fantastic save and caught it.

"Pretty good, yo. But you'll have to do better then that."

Samus gritted her teeth. She kicked the ball again, but this time straight up into the air. She jumped up and kicked it with the back of her foot. Funky Kong jumped up to save it, but it went through his legs into the goal.

"Exceptional," he remarked, throwing the ball back. Samus made three more shots, but missed the last one. She gave a brief nod and then went back over to the smashers.

"Alright. Who's next?"

"That would be me," Link raised his hand and walked up to the soccer ball. He backed up, ran up and kicked the black and white ball. Funky Kong jumped up to block the goal again, but it hit his knees, making Funky Kong lose his balance and fall as the ball went through.

"Pretty good. You're just lucky I got knee surgery a couple days ago," Funky Kong grinned, throwing the ball back. Link kicked the ball again, using the same strategy, but this time Funky Kong blocked it.

"Got a find a new technique, yo," Funky Kong said, throwing the ball back.

Link cocked his head, and then grinned. He kicked the ball up into the air, and then made a spectacular leap, jumping above the ball. He pushed both of his legs down, and the ball shot through the net. Funky Kong threw the ball back, smiling. Link did a basic shot this time, which Funky Kong easily blocked.

"You'd better make this last one, dude." Funky Kong said, throwing the ball back. Link gritted his teeth, before an idea sparked in his head. He turned his back to the goal, and put his foot on the ball. He then kicked it up into the air an incredible distance. He waited patiently for it to come down. When it did, he did a backflip and hit it with his foot. It headed toward the top post, and bounced off it backwards into the goal. Link smiled and went back to the smashers.

Bowser went up next. He made 4 goals out of 5, nearly making up for his performance on the obstacle course. Marth went next, scoring 3 out of 5 like Link. Afterwards came Mario, and then Luigi, who scored a 4 out of 5 and a 3 out of 5 respectively.

"Alright," Funky Kong walked back to the smashers after Fox scored a 3 out of 5. "Next is the game. I want Luigi, Falco, Wolf, Samus, Link, Sonic, Red, Waluigi, Bowser, Diddy Kong, Toon Link, Krystal, Samurai Goroh, and King DeDeDe on one team, and the rest of you on the other. Let's play!"

"Alright. Huddle!" Luigi beckoned everyone in. "Who here is good at goalie?"

Wolf and King DeDeDe raised their hands. Luigi pondered this for a second.

"Wolf, I think we may need your quick thinking in another position. Plus, King DeDeDe is larger. Let's have him take a shot at it."

Wolf shrugged. "Fine by me."

"Alright. Who here is interested in defense?"

Wolf, Red, Toon Link, Krystal and Samurai Goroh raised their hands. Luigi nodded.

"Okay, let's have Wolf, Krystal and Toon Link. Midfield?"

Link, Waluigi, Falco, and Red raised their hands. Luigi nodded.

"Alright, let's have Red, Link and Falco for midfield. Offense?"

Everyone who didn't already get a position raised their hands. Luigi thought for a moment.

"Okay, I'm going to put me, Samus, Sonic and Bowser on offense. Samurai, Waluigi, Diddy Kong, we'll put you in later. Sound fair?"

Everyone nodded.

"Good. Let's-a go!"

King DeDeDe waddled over to the goalpost. Wolf, Krystal and Toon Link ran back with him, while Link, Falco and Red ran over to the center. Luigi and Mario faced each other as Funky Kong walked up to them.

"Ready, set… go!"

Mario kicked the ball over to Dixie Kong, who dribbled it up the field to Link's post. She passed to Fox, who shot it at the goal. King DeDeDe jumped in the way, and it bounced off his belly straight into Red's possession. He passed to Falco, who dribbled it up the field. He passed to Samus, who dribbled it around Mario and took the shot. King K. Rool dived to save it, but it rolled off his fingertips into the goal. Link punched his fist into the air and ran backwards. Mario took the ball and dribbled it up the court. Link tried to reach in and grab the ball, but Mario jumped over him and kicked the ball around him. He passed to Yoshi, who happily dribbled it near the goal. Toon Link slid in and knocked it out of his possession, but out of bounds.

"Corner kick! Red team! You guys are playing to three!"

Mario took the corner kick and passed it to Dixie Kong, who shot it. King DeDeDe dived to save it, but tripped over his jacket and helplessly watched as it rolled into the goal. A large amount of cheering emerged from the red team.

Luigi sighed, took the ball, and dribbled it up. He passed to Bowser, who immediately powerfully kicked it straight into the goal.

"Time!" Mario yelled. Luigi shrugged and walked his team over to the benches.

"Good work everybody; we're ahead. Listen, I want Diddy Kong to switch in for Falco, Waluigi to switch in for me, and Samurai to switch in for Red. Good work again, everyone."

They all put their fists in the middle of their circle and cheered. They ran back onto the field.

"Go!"

Mario dribbled the ball up and passed it to Leon Powalski. He slid past Krystal and passed back to Mario. Mario slid and kicked it over to King K. Rool, who was now playing offense. King K. Rool kicked it in the direction of the goal.

"Nooooo!" King DeDeDe shouted. He ran for it, but tripped over a twig. He landed straight on top of the ball, stopping it before it got into the goal.

"Nice work, DeDeDe!" Wolf called. "King? King DeDeDe?"

Luigi sighed. "Wolf, why don't you take over for him? Red, you take his place."

Wolf dragged the unconscious King DeDeDe off the field, and picked up the ball. He threw it to Luigi, who began to dribble it down. However, Ganondorf slid in, and passed to Shadow. Shadow ran past the defense and shot it, flying past his roommate and into the goal. Wolf sighed and threw it to Link, who dribbled it down the court. Mario slid in to take it, but Link knocked the ball backwards to Diddy Kong. Diddy Kong ran it down the field and passed to Bowser, who took a shot. Dixie Kong, the new goalie, jumped up and saved the ball. Excited, she threw the ball as hard as she could, straight toward the goal. Wolf was unaware, and chatting with Red.

"So, how's life?"

"Life's good, life's good."

"How are the kids?"

"Uh-what kids?"

"You know, Tom and Marley? Remember?"

"I know a Tom, but not a Marley."

"Oh, no, wait, I'm thinking of my friend _Blue_. Sorry about that, Red."

"No problem."

There was an awkward pause. Red whistled a little tune.

"So, er-how about those Knicks?"

Suddenly, the ball came flying out of nowhere, and hit Wolf in the head so hard that it bounced all the way back to the other side of the field, into the goal.

"Victory goes to the green team!" Funky Kong shouted.

"Alright! We won!" Luigi shouted. He turned to Red. "Uh, how's Wolf?"

"He's in a minor coma. But hey, we won!"

"Good point."

Everybody gathered around Funky Kong as he jotted some notes down on his clipboard. He finally cleared his throat.

"I have made my final decision. The 11 people on the team will be Sonic…"

"You're too slow!"

"Mario…"

"It's-a me! Mario!"

"Luigi…"

"Mama Mia!"

"Link…"

"It's the boy in green, he's lean and mean, and he's a soccer machine!"

"Bowser…"

"We're No. 1! We're No. 1! We're No…" a soccer ball suddenly hit Bowser in the head, and he collapsed, unconscious.

"Samus…"

"You haven't seen anything yet…"

"Dixie Kong…"

"Er-bananas?"

"King DeDeDe…"

"ZZZ…snort…yes, I would like chocolate on that…"

"Falco…"

"Personally, I prefer the air!"

"Krystal…"

"Prepare yourself."

"And Marth!"

Everybody turned to Marth. He shrugged.

"…What?"

"Come on. You've got to have a lame catchphrase!"

"Uh…bonsai?"

"That's the spirit!"

Everybody who didn't make the cut walked away grumbling. Funky Kong held out his hand.

"Wait! We still have the substitutes!" Funky Kong said. Everybody shrugged and went back. "They will be Yoshi, Wolf, and Waluigi. Our first practice will be tomorrow. Have a nice day."

* * *

Bustman: So, how did you like it? I don't think it's a personal best, but that's for you to decide. Please review; even if you don't have an account you can, now. Toodles!


	12. The First Press Conference

Bustman: Hey, I'm back…again! I'm back again, and this time with the first purely funny chapter since _Chaos Above _Ground. A sneak preview…what goes into a good super smash bros. game? Is it a duck (don't worry, you'll get this after reading)? And will the smashers be able to survive a (gasp) press conference?! Read on to find out!

Ike: And remember, Bustman owns absolutely nothing!

Bustman: So true. Read and review.

* * *

All of the smashers were gathered around a large table, Master Hand at the head, and Crazy Hand at the other end. All of the smashers were in black suits or white dresses, and a mug of coffee was lying in front of every one of them.

"Er-Crazy? I'm 10 years old. I don't drink coffee." Toon Link said to Crazy. Crazy turned to him.

"You'll drink your coffee, or you'll- uh…"

"Diminish slowly and painfully?" Toon Link suggested. Crazy Hand vigorously nodded.

"Yeah! What you said! Oh, yes, I will take a jellybean." Crazy Hand politely took a jellybean off the tray Amy Rose was passing around after his outburst. Toon Link sighed and took a sip of the coffee.

"Can I at least have some sugar?"

"You will have no such thing! The last thing we need at this meeting is a hyperactive child with bombs and a sword." Master Hand strictly ordered. He then turned to the table of smashers. "As you know, today we are sketching out the videogame. We thought you, being participants, should help us with this. So, any suggestions?"

"There should be a longer story mode!"

"There should be a cup holder on the wii!"

"Why do today when you can put off 'till tomorrow?"

"The case should be in the shape of a duck!"

"Excuse me?" Master Hand turned to Crazy Hand.

"You know, a duck! Wings, float on lakes, you know?" Crazy Hand got out a dictionary and cleared his throat. "A billed water bird with webbed feet and colored feathers that waddles around on-"

"I know perfectly well what a duck is!" Master Hand sighed. "But why a duck?"

"Maybe it's metaphorical!" Everyone turned to Pit. "You know, maybe it means, like, the game is a duck, because it has so many stomachs, comparing to all our game modes…"

"That's a cow you're thinking of, smartness." Wolf growled, an ice pack on his head from the soccer game days previous.

"But cows eat ducks, don't they?" Louie asked.

"Why in the world would cows eat _ducks_?" Leon Powalski snorted. "They aren't even on the same terrain as each other."

"It's going to rain today?"

"No, he said _terrain_."

"Same difference."

"_Terrain_," Crazy Hand cleared his throat. "A stretch of land, derived from-"

"Oh, for the love of god, we're getting nowhere!" Master Hand grumbled.

"Is it time for a snack break? I'm thinking to hard," Wario moaned.

"I'll-a second that, arch-a enemy."

Master Hand sighed. "Look, we'll take a break once we have five _real_ ideas down."

"How about we start with the name?" Lyn politely suggested. Master Hand nodded.

"Who has some good ideas?"

"Super Smash Bros.-Revealed!"

"Super Smash Bros.-The Real Story!"

"Super Smash Bros.-A Documentary About The Tragic Smashing Incident."

"Super Smash Bros. The Film! Starring Jim Carrey, George Clooney and Angelina Jolie!"

"Aaaaaarghhh!" Master Hand threw his…hand up in distress. "Alright, we're calling it Super Smash Bros. Fray!"

"That's boring!"

"Oh, shut up, you flabby excuse for a penguin!"

"Who are you calling a penguin?"

"So that means we _don't_ get to hire the Coen Bros. as directors?"

"Yeah, think about how good that would look on the poster! Super Smash Brothers, a comedy made by the Coen Brothers!"

"No way, we're making an action movie!"

"My fingers are crossed for a chick flick!"

"People! We are not making a movie!" Master Hand shouted.

"Well then how do we make any money at the box office?"

Master Hand turned to Crazy Hand for support. "Crazy?"

Crazy Hand shrugged. "Don't look at me. I thought we were making a memoir."

Bustman raised his hand. "If I may? I think the ability to control a ship would be cool for adventure mode. Certain modes could just have flying levels. The wii mote would be very sufficient."

"Alright. At least we have someone sane in the building." Master Hand scribbled something down on his clipboard.

"I finished the cover art!" Crazy Hand raised up a picture he had sketched moments ago up in the air.

"Crazy, that's a freaking bunny rabbit smoking a cigar in a bathtub!"

"It's like life! The longer you stay in, the more wrinkles you get!"

Bustman smiled, interlocking his fingers.

"If Crazy's ideas aren't adequate, I have some more…"

Suddenly Julianmon burst into the room, a blue beam sword in hand.

"Your evil ideas will remain inside your own head, Bustman!"

"Make them!" Bustman drew a red beam sword, and the two began to fight an epic duel. Bustman did a back flip out the window onto the windowsill of a building across the street. Julianmon did a cartwheel onto the windowsill next to it, where they continued their duel. Link sighed, got up, and closed the window.

"Well that was…odd." Master Hand said. He suddenly brightened. "But it gives me another good idea!" He scribbled something down on his clipboard. "_Ability to do back flips and front flips…"_

"You know what else would be cool? Using ducks as items!" Crazy Hand said brightly.

"How would that work?"

"Well, you see, when you pick it up, it immediately shoot across the screen, damaging anyone in it's path…"

"It could also drop duck poop on you!"

"That's m'boy!"

Master Hand sighed. "When did ducks become the new 'hip' and 'happening'?"

"When MTV died."

"When American Idol began."

"The Cold War."

Master Hand shook his head. He turned to Link pleadingly. Link sighed.

"How about we decide who here should be unlockable?"

"Good idea. Everyone who has been a starter in every game, to the left side of the room, unlockable in every game, the right, and newcomer and both in the middle."

The smashers obeyed quickly. Master Hand talked to Crazy Hand for a few minutes, and then cleared his throat.

"We have decided that Mario, Peach, Bowser, Yoshi, Wario, Donkey Kong, King K. Rool, Kirby, Meta Knight, King DeDeDe, Pikachu, Minun & Plusle, Red, Captain Falcon, Link, Zelda, Fox, Krystal, Lucas, Olimar, The Ice Climbers, Pit, Isaac, Sonic, Snake, Samus, Marth, Lyn and K.K. will be starters. Luigi, Waluigi, Baby Mario & Luigi, Bowser Jr, Dixie Kong, Diddy Kong, Meowth, Jigglypuff, Lucario, Samurai Goroh, Ganondorf, Toon Link, Falco, Leon Powalski, Wolf, Ness, Louie, Balloon Fighter, Mr. Game and Watch, R.O.B., Shadow, and Ike will be unlockables. Sound fair?"

"What about the duck?"

"There is no duck!"

"Fine. Be that way."

"I have an idea." Balloon Fighter piped up. "I think a balloon could be a cool item. If the balloon connects, it pops and stuns you temporarily."

"Okay." Master Hand jotted this down. "That's 5. You may all take your snack break."

"I'm not hungry anymore."

"Nah, me either."

"The mentioning of duck poop made me lose my appetite."

Master Hand sighed. "Why must you all make my job so hard for me?"

* * *

"And Bingo was his name-o!"

Crazy Hand finished his round of 'Bingo' and started to move onto 'The Itsy-Bitsy Spider'. Baby Mario and Luigi laughed and clapped along. Master Hand turned to Kapp'n.

"So-uh…how does it look?"

"Aye, not to good." Kapp'n turned to the smashers. "Remember those sunglasses I gave you at the beginning of the bus ride? Aye. Put them on."

The smashers gulped and put on their sunglasses. They were already wearing helmets, bulletproof vests over their suits, and padding on their elbows and knees. Kapp'n honked the horn of the bus.

"Aye, get out of the way! I can't get them off the bus if you don't!"

Link turned to Marth. "If I don't make it out of here alive, tell my mother that I love her."

"Dude, your mother's dead."

Link shifted his weight uneasily. "Then I'll tell her myself."

Marth looked around. Captain Falcon was bending down on his knees, praying to the 'rock gods', while K.K. Slider was sadly playing a blues tune. Luigi was quivering under his seat, while Kirby was uneasily picking at his bag of peanuts. Waluigi's eyes were as wide as saucers under his sunglasses, and even the cocky Mario was beginning to look frightened.

"May the force be with ya." Kapp'n stopped the bus. Master Hand sighed.

"Just remember; pay no attention to _anyone_ until you are safely up on stage."

Many of the smashers were taking deep breaths. Kapp'n sighed and slid the bus doors open.

"There they are!"

"The super smash brothers!"

"OMG!!"

"Run for it!!" Master Hand yelled. The smashers ran off the bus as quickly as possible. They were met by thousands of flashing cameras that surely would have blinded them if their eyes weren't protected. Thousands of fangirls were running towards the smashers, and all 55 of them braced themselves.

"You'll never take me alive!"

"Oh dear lord, if you can hear me now…"

"Go ahead, do your worst!"

"You're too slooooooooooow!"

The fangirls mobbed the smashers. Link gasped for air as he was crushed under the weight of hundreds of screaming fan girls and nerds in green tunics.

"Please, people!" he gasped. "Shouldn't we be signing autographs?"

The fangirls ignored him. They fought each other for a chance to touch the 'Hero of Time', while Link slowly got up and started to run. The fangirls, quickly noticing his absence, chased after him. Link sighed.

"Well, mom, you better tell God to make room for one more up there…"

Mario was not faring so well either. Plumbers from all around the world were gathering around him and Luigi, slowly advancing on them. The two brothers were trapped between the bus and the mob.

"Hey Luigi?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you bro."

"Me too. Hey Mario?"

"Yeah?"

"I used your toothbrush to dislodge the toilet."

"You _what??_"

The two brothers screamed as the fans pounced.

Samus and Krystal were back to back, Samus with her plasma whip in hand, and Krystal equipped with her staff. The paparazzi were flashing thousands of pictures. Krystal whimpered.

"It's no use. There are too many of them."

"Too many there may be…" Samus growled. "But we ain't going down without a fight." The two smashers screamed and dived into the crowd of journalists. The other smashers weren't having the best of luck either. Kirby, who had been enjoying himself for a while his 8 to 10 year old fans had fed him little treats, had now had enough. For once, he was full, but the fans wouldn't take that as an answer. He was now being chased around, the fans throwing food at him. Jigglypuff was trying to sing the crazed fans to sleep, but they interrupted her every time she started to sing a song. Peach and Zelda were trying to sign autographs, but new fans mobbed them anytime they tried to sign their name. Pikachu was being bombarded by poké balls, while the members of the E.V.U. were being chased around by thousands of teenage boys asking for their autographs. Captain Falcon stood in the middle of the madness, whistling.

"Hello? Is anyone going to try to tear _me_ apart? Helloooo?"

"Quickly, up here!" Diddy Kong screeched, beckoning to the bus. He scurried up it while his fans waved their fists angrily. Link used his clawshot to grab on to the top of the bus, while Samus used her plasma whip. All of the rest of the smashers quickly followed suit. The crowd banged their fists angrily against the bus as the smashers cowered up on top of it.

"What do we do?" Link shouted over the noise.

"It was foolish going out there on our own. We have to unite as a group!" Snake growled. Suddenly, the bus rocked. All of the smashers slid to the left side of the roof.

"Alright," Isaac growled. "Let's do this!"

All of the smashers jumped off the bus in unison. Link landed and did a spin attack to clear a circle around him. Pikachu scurried beneath his feet, head butting a boy who was shoving a piece of paper and a pen in Lucario's face. Charizard, holding Nana, Popo and Toon Link, soared over the crowd, dodging the pens the angry fans were throwing at him. Mario and Luigi cleared a path using fireballs, while Kirby was sucking up any cameras and autograph books that got to close. Fox and Falco rode their arwings over the crowd, while Samus was whipping anyone that got to close. Link dived through the legs of three fans, and stepped up to Marth.

"Ready?"

"As I'll ever be."

The two smashers let out a battle cry and dived into the crowd. Link threw a 13-year-old fan off, and then tripped a boy in a tunic who was running up to him. He did a back flip over towards the stage, and then quickly scrambled up. He sighed in relief. He held out a hand to Marth, who was at the foot of the stage and being slowly advanced on by his Japanese fans.

"Thanks." Marth gasped. Link took a deep breath.

"No problem."

Marth looked down. "Well, we're safe up here. No one is allowed on the stage but us. If they come on, they'll be forced to leave.

Mario, overalls torn and looking very tired, climbed up onto the stage. "I think this is some sort of abuse."

"I'm going to look that up when I get home." Luigi, said in between gasps.

Link, Marth, Luigi and Mario helped other smashers up as they approached the stage. After they hauled on the last one, Fox, who had a black eye, on, Master Hand floated up to the stage.

"What an…um…eager welcome," Master Hand said. "We are all very _pleased_," Master Hand took a bottle of mouthwash, gurgled it, and spat it out. "To have you here. So, any questions?"

"Luigi, how do you feel about being the cowardly brother?"

"Mario, are you still in a relationship with Peach?"

"Pikachu, how many volts of electricity do your cheeks hold?"

"Kirby, can I have my camera back?"

"Link, what do you eat for breakfast?"

"Baby Mario and Luigi, it goes against every law of physics that you're here. How do you feel about that?"

"Yoshi, why were you named after your species?"

"Enough!" Master Hand roared. The paparazzi hushed. "We are only accepting questions related to the game, and one at a time. Yes, you?"

A blonde reporter with a clipboard and glasses stood up. "How did you smashers react when you heard you were going to be in a fourth game?"

"Well, to tell you the truth, we weren't very happy about it." Mario spoke into his microphone. "Mostly because we knew at some point we'd have to face _this_."

The crowd laughed.

"I'm not kidding."

The reporter pressed. "How did the newcomers feel?"

Lyn cleared her throat. "We were, of course, overjoyed and unprepared upon hearing the news that we were going to join the biggest videogame phenomenon of the century."

"Unprepared is the key word…" Krystal, who was looking pretty torn up, muttered.

Another reporter stood up.

"How will this game differ from the previous installments in the series?"

Master Hand spoke this time. "We were just discussing that the other day. The smashers, of course, will have their attacks improved and their design more realistic. The adventure mode will be longer, and the ability to control ships, a new experience for many smash brother fans, will be added. There will be possibly be more attacks, and, of course, we will have many newcomers."

The reporter scribbled all of this down. Seconds after he had sat down again, another reporter stood up.

"A question for Mr. Ike; do you feel all of the final smashes were equally powerful if used wisely?"

Ike cleared his throat. "It really depends on your playing style, and, of course, when they're used. I think that every final smash has a fair chance at KOing the opponent."

Another reporter stood up. "A question for Mr. Link. Link, why do you feel there are two alternate copies of you? Don't you feel one is sufficient?"

"I think Toon Link was brought into the game so Link fans who are looking for a speedier, lighter me would be able to play my Toon form. Also, in this game, an alternation to my form might drive players to Toon Link to play a more classic me."

The reporter was about to ask what the alternation would be, but Master Hand interrupted. "Well said, Link, well said. But you are to release no further information on your alternation. So," Master Hand looked up at the crowd. "Next?"

* * *

Bustman: So, did you like the chapter? I had lots of fun writing it. A new update will come soon!

Ike: Toodles!


	13. The Tournaments Begin

Bustman: Hey, I'm back. Did you like the last chapter? I sincerely hope so. Anyways, I have the thirteenth right here. And because that's such an unlucky number, we have Meta Knight doing the disclaimer!

Meta Knight: Whoopee. (An asteroid suddenly crashes through the roof and lands on him).

Bustman: You okay down there, Meta?

Meta Knight: Remind me why I agreed to do this?

Bustman: Because, silly, if you don't, you'll have to go to the torture chamber! (Bustman points to a machine with two metal plates with spikes on them that are quickly banging together. Meta Knight gulps).

Meta Knight: Bustmandoesnotownanythingdon'tthinkhedoesallcharactersbelongtotheirrespectiveowners!

Bustman: Good man. Read and review!

* * *

The moon shone high in the sky, turning the grass silver. A cricket chirped from somewhere in one of the trees, but aside from that, everything was silent. Link stared at the full moon, a picnic blanket spread beneath him to act as a barrier between him and the wet grass. Zelda leaned against his shoulder, quietly watching the moon as well. Up in the dark night, the stars shone brightly and silently.

"It's beautiful…" Zelda murmured. Link, eyes still fixated on the moon, nodded.

"Starlight Hill…" Link murmured. "When the previous games became overwhelming, this is where I always went to unwind."

"It is all a bit overwhelming right now, isn't it?" Zelda asked. Link nodded.

"To think that we're going to have hundreds more of those press conferences…" Link shuddered. Zelda silently nodded.

"…Does anyone else know about this place?"

"Ike does." Link responded quietly. "When he was a newcomer at the Smash Mansion, most everyone used to tease him, being the gullible, soft-spoken guy he is." Link paused. "I showed him this place. He came here near every night afterwards."

The two smashers went quiet and stared at the moon silently for a few more minutes. Finally, Zelda broke the silence again.

"So, Wolf Link is making his comeback, eh?"

"Mmmm." Link nodded.

"The people with two alternate forms have to put in extra work," Zelda murmured. "We have to work nearly twice as much as the other smashers."

Link smiled. "Then we'll be coming back here a lot then, won't we?"

Zelda laughed. Many minutes passed.

"Do you believe in God, Link?"

"I guess I have to, don't I?" Link gave out a small laugh. "Given all of the times my butt has been miraculously saved just in the nick of time." Link paused. "Do you?"

Zelda clucked her tongue. "I believe in heaven. I think when you die, you go up to the sky and watch over the ones you love." She sighed. "I'm not sure whether I believe in God, given all that's gone wrong in this world." She shook her head. Link turned to her.

"I believe in God." He said quietly. "The last words my father ever said to me were, Son, don't lose faith." Link quivered. "There is a lot going wrong in this world now, I admit, but look," Link nodded at the large moon in the sky. "We still have _this_. There's still love in this world, and there's still happiness and peace, even though it can't be found in all places anymore." Link's blue eyes met Zelda's own. "Don't you think that's something?"

Zelda sighed and lay down. Link followed suit, and turned onto his side to look at her. Zelda turned over and stared at him.

"I don't know," was her answer. She laid down on her back and shut her eyes. Link continued to stare up at the moon.

"I love you, Link," she murmured. Link smiled.

"I love you too, Zelda."

* * *

Link awoke to the sensation of having something wet continuously lap at his face. He opened his eyes wearily. A small golden retriever, no more then two months old, was licking his face. He sat up bolt right. The puppy fell off of him and wagged his tail. Ike stared down at him, smiling.

"You awake now?"

Link groaned. He was still fully dressed, and Zelda, still in her white dress from the press conference, was breathing rhythmically beside him in her sleep. The sun had replaced the moon up in the sky, and birds were chirping in the trees above. Link groaned, and held out his hand.

"Help me up?"

Ike leaned down, grabbed his hand, and pulled him up to his feet. The small dog was now eagerly licking Zelda's face, and she shot up, sputtering.

"What-?"

"You two fell asleep up here." Ike explained. "It's nearly 11:00 am. Everyone's worried, especially Peach." Ike looked down at Zelda. "She nearly had a heart attack when she awoke to find that you weren't there, and she's been worried sick all morning." Ike looked around at the landscape. "I thought you guys might be here. It's been a long time since I've visited this place."

Zelda got to her feet and brushed herself. "Thanks, Ike. I'm sorry we worried everyone. I'm guessing Peach sent you out-?"

"To look for you, yeah." Ike finished. "It's alright. You'd better get down to the mansion before Peach calls the cops."

"Right." Zelda murmured. Link kissed her on the cheek.

"Quickly, now."

Zelda smiled and started back down the trail. Link bent down and began to roll up the towel they had been laying on. The dog curiously sniffed his hand. Link drew back up again, towel in his hand. He looked down at the golden puppy. "Er-what's with the dog?"

Ike smiled. "Oh, I forgot to tell you. This is Ray."

"Whose is he?"

"He's mine." Ike said. "I went on a walk through town the other night and just found him digging through a trash can. No collar or anything. So I took him back home to the mansion, and Master Hand said it was okay if I kept him." Ike leaned down and scratched him behind the ears. "He's staying in our room."

"Is he, um…"

"Potty trained?" Ike asked. "I suppose so. He's been pretty good so far."

Link sighed and started down the trail. Ike walked alongside him, Ray tagging along obediently.

"So, how's soccer going so far?"

"Pretty good." Link shrugged. "As a team, we work pretty well together. Whenever Bowser seems to make a goal, though, he always seems to get himself hurt and we have to have Wolf take over for him."

"Well, that doesn't really come as much of a surprise, now does it?"

"I suppose not." Link smiled. He hopped down a few rocks, and the back of the mansion came into view. Ray wagged his tail excitedly and ran towards the large building.

"He certainly does seem to have a lot of energy, doesn't he?" Link smiled. Ike nodded.

"Let's hope he doesn't keep us up all night."

Link took out his key and let Ray in through the back door of the mansion. Ray ran in, shook himself, and ran out through the other door. Momentarily, a distant cry could be heard of "Ray! Down!" Marth entered the room and flinched when he saw Link. He ran up to him and gave him a bear hug.

"Dude! Where were you! You had me worried sick!"

Link grinned. "Calm down, calm down. I fell asleep on a mountain out back."

Marth sighed and plopped down in a chair. "Is Zelda with you?"

"Zelda went ahead to calm down Peach." Ike said. "I told you not to worry, didn't I?"

Marth was about to answer, but Ray jumped onto his stomach, knocking the breath out of him. Ray circled around and lay down on Marth's lap. Once he had taken a deep breath of air, Marth laughed.

"Energetic little fellow, isn't he?"

"Let's just hope he doesn't get in my way," Wolf grumbled, looking like he had just woken up. He poured himself a cup of coffee, sat down, and sipped it.

"We'll make sure he won't." Ike nodded his head respectfully, trying not to get on Wolf's bad side. Wolf sighed.

"We got soccer practice today?"

"No," Link shook his head. "Funky Kong is repairing the field after that flaming meteor struck Bowser and he went on a rampage setting everything on fire, remember?"

Wolf ran his hand through his head fur. "Right."

Luigi yawned as he walked in, rubbing sleep out of his eyes. "Does anyone know what we're doing today?"

Wolf grabbed the schedule in his bag and opened it. "Nothing. It's a Saturday." Wolf grumbled. He squinted. "Oh, wait…we're having a dinner in honor of the start of the game today."

"Ohhhh…" Ike grumbled. "That means _more_ dressing up?"

"Apparently so," Wolf sighed and threw the schedule back in his bag. "Want to go catch a tournament?"

"Is there one starting soon?" Link asked. Wolf nodded.

"Master Hand had to find something to make up for Saturday morning cartoons. The cable broke down, and when the guy came to fix it, Crazy thought he was an intruder and knocked him out cold with a banana. Master Hand's having trouble trying to find another company to fix it."

"Sounds like something good ol' Crazy would do." Ike grumbled. "That sucks. I won't be able to watch _General Hospital_."

"Thank God." Marth mumbled. He got up, and Ray slid off him. "Alright, then. Let's go catch that tournament."

* * *

"CRAZY!!"

"What's up, bro?"

"What is the meaning of _this??_"

"Oh," Crazy Hand looked at the battle arena. News reporters were everywhere, and the bleachers were filled with screaming fans.

"All of our tournaments are supposed to be closed to spectators!" Master Hand hissed. "Why did you invite the damn paparazzi in?"

"Well, bro, you got so worked up over the cable guy thing, I figured that there anyone who came to the mansion was probably invited by you. So, I let a couple news reporters in."

"Mister Hand!" A man in a black suit pushed a microphone into Master Hand's face. "Do you have anything to say to the audiences watching from home?"

"Oh, I have many things I'd like to say right now-"

"And there you have it!" the reporter turned and shot a wide smile at the camera. "We are being advertised today by _Nightmare Enterprises_! You know you're a beat, spineless fool- I mean, sweet, stylish and cool!" the reporter gave an uneasy laugh. Crazy Hand stepped in front of him.

"Hello! Wow, I'm on TV! Hi, Mommy! Oh, and I want to give a shout out to Bob, who…"

The reporter shoved Crazy out of the way. "And it looks like the smashers are now walking into the stadium. They look extremely surprised and disgusted that we're here! Let's step in for an interview, shall we?"

The reporter ran up to King DeDeDe, who was eating a taco. "Mr. DeDeDe! How are you liking that taco?"

"My taco! Mine!!" DeDeDe shouted, whacking the reporter in the stomach with his hammer. The reporter slid over to Wolf.

"Ah, Mr. O'Donnell! Can you spare a few minutes of your time for an interview?"

"No," Wolf growled. "I suggest you step away."

"So, Mr. O'Donnell, you played Sleepy in your school production of _Snow White_, did you not?"

"I'm warning you right now…"

"And you also peed yourself during your musical number, am I correct?"

"You have three seconds…"

"Let's see…you dropped out of high school, now did you?"

"One…"

"And you dressed up as a ballerina for the reality show _How Low Can You Go_?"

"_Two_…"

"And what is with that outfit? I mean, doesn't it make you look a bit _fat_?"

"Three!" Wolf jumped on top of the reporter and began to clobber him. The reporter gasped for breath and looked at the cameraman.

"Are you getting this all on tape?"

The cameraman nodded.

"Excellent." The reporter was punched in the back by Wolf again and fell to the floor.

"So, um…welcome to our first tournament." Master Hand said uneasily. "Reporters, return to your seat or we _will_ badmouth your television channels on our tour."

All of the reporters quickly returned to their seats. Master Hand cleared his throat.

"Well, it looks like 32 of you have come today, giving us a perfect amount for a tournament." Master Hand beckoned to the scoreboard. "These will be a series of two stock matches, all items present. And now, the scoreboard will randomly pick who will be against who."

The scoreboard went black for a second, and then the screen went blue. All of the smashers present names were on them, and they all crowded around to see.

"Alright! First match; Wolf vs. King DeDeDe!"

"Don't think this is over yet." Wolf pointed an unsheathed claw at the reporter. He walked into the teleporter, and appeared on Poké Floats.

Ready…GO!!

Wolf jumped up onto the head of the Squirtle floating in the sky. However, King DeDeDe beat him there, and sucked him up. He spit him out as a star, and Wolf nearly fell off the edge. He used his Fire Wolf to recover, hitting King DeDeDe in the stomach.

"No!! My taco!" Kind DeDeDe cried, as the taco he had been holding fell over the edge. He dived after it, and fell out of boundaries. He reemerged at the top of the stage, munching on his taco.

"And DeDeDe sacrifices his life for a taco!" the reporter exclaimed. "It better be top quality meat!"

"It is!" King DeDeDe said, specks of taco flying out of his mouth from the screen. Wolf ran up to him, but King DeDeDe jumped up onto the Onix. Wolf used his Fire Wolf again, but when he reached King DeDeDe's height, the penguin whacked him in the stomach with a hammer. Wolf nearly flew off screen, but used his Wolf Flash to recover. King DeDeDe threw a waddle dee at him, but Wolf used his reflector and it hit King DeDeDe. While in the air, the king floated over to Wooper, who had just appeared. Wolf followed, unaware that King DeDeDe was charging his hammer. He landed in front of the king only to be blasted away again out of bounds. Wolf reemerged again, and kicked King DeDeDe, who countered by jumping high in the sky and onto Wolf. He bellowed with laughter as Wolf flew away, but the wolf wasn't done yet. He used his Fire Wolf again, and struck King DeDeDe's taco. It went spiraling down, but landed on a Wheezing. The king jumped down and scooped it up.

"King DeDeDe, I thought someone as royal as you would know manners." Wolf growled, jumping down. "Haven't you heard of the 5 second rule?" the wolf kicked the king in the stomach, off stage. The crowd went wild.

"I lost? Oh, well." King DeDeDe took out another taco and began munching it. Master Hand floated up.

"What a spectacular match! Crazy, who is next?"

"Let's see, brother!" Crazy Hand said. "Next is…Ike against Marth! One stock match, all items present, on Bridge of Eldin!"

"Excellent!" Master Hand boomed. Ike and Marth walked into the teleporters, and reappeared on a long bridge.

READY…GO!

Marth made the first move. He ran up to Ike and slashed his sword at him. However, Ike was prepared. He used Counter, throwing Marth off balance. He then used Eruption, throwing Marth to the other side of the stage. Marth landed on the ground hard, but looked up to see that a poke ball had landed in front of him. He threw it at Ike, who, running towards him, was unprepared and allowed the red and white ball to hit him. A Chikorita popped out, and started throwing razor sharp leaves at him. Ike blocked some with his swords, but others hit him. However, he took the blows silently, and, as soon as the Pokémon was done, ran towards Marth. He used Aether, sending Marth flying into the air. He then jumped up and sliced him down. Marth hit the ground hard again, but used his legs to trip Ike. He jumped up and used his dolphin slash, which caused Ike to fly away.

Suddenly, hooves could be heard approaching. Marth dived beneath the King Bulbin's boar's legs, but Ike was not so lucky. As soon as he got up, he flew off screen, but not out of bounds. He ran back onto stage as the middle of the bridge blew up. The two swordsmen were now on opposite sides, staring at each other, carefully planning what they would do next.

Their concentration was interrupted as a red ball with the super smash bros. symbol on it appeared right in front of Marth. Marth slashed at it, but it just lazily drifted away. Ike jumped up and slashed it, and it broke. Red energy flew into him, and he grinned.

"Great…AETHER!!" Ike flicked his sword at Marth, who flew up towards the center of the screen. Ike repeatedly slashed him, and then prepared for the final blow. He brought his sword down on Marth, spiking him straight down into the gap in the bridge.

GAME!

Marth and Ike reemerged from the teleporters, Ike grinning.

"And it looks like Ike has won! I remember only yesterday he was asked if all of the final smashes were equal, and he just proved his point, that it depends on when and where use them!"

Marth turned toward his friend and held out his hand. "Good game."

Ike took Marth's hand and shook it. "Good game."

"Great match! What do we have next, Crazy?"

"Jigglypuff against Meta Knight!"

"Let's do it!"

The smashers watched as they continued to fight each other. Finally, it came down to the last battle.

"Already in the next round is Wolf, Ike, Meta Knight, Peach, K.K. Slider, Waluigi, Baby Mario and Luigi, Lyn, Meowth, Balloon Fighter, Toon Link, Falco, Isaac, Luigi, and Bowser! Will it be Krystal or Link joining their ranks?"

Link stepped into the teleporter. He emerged on final destination. The blue vixen, equipped with her staff, stepped out of hers and turned to face him.

Ready…GO!

Link took out his bow and arrows and shot one of them. Krystal blocked it with her staff, and charged towards him. Link sidestepped her and hit her back with his sword. She spun around and whacked him with her staff. Link staggered back, shook himself, and threw a bomb. Krystal jumped back out of the way, just out of range. Link charged toward her, but she slammed her staff down onto the ground. Shockwaves went through the ground, bowling Link over. Krystal ran up to him, but Link tripped her as he got up. He used his spin attack, sending her flying away. He ran at her, expecting her to hit the ground hard, but instead she landed on her feet. She extended her staff, and hit Link in the stomach. He flew off the edge, but used his clawshot as a tether recovery. He hopped back up and kicked Krystal in the stomach, and then performed a sword combo on her. She went flying off the stage. She did her two jumps, and then prepared for her third, but Link suddenly appeared above her, pointing his sword down towards her. She was spiked down, and fell into the darkness.

GAME!

"Link! An interview?" the reporter pressed the microphone to Link's face as he stepped out of the teleporter. "Any words about the tournament so far?"

"Well, I'm going to get my friend King DeDeDe answer that question." Link beckoned King DeDeDe forward. "DeDeDe, this kind gentleman wants to know what you think about the tournament so far."

"My taco!!" King DeDeDe screeched, whacking the reporter away. Link turned to him.

"Thanks."

"MY TACO!!"

Link ran away before the penguin whacked his hammer into him. Master Hand cleared his throat.

"And that brings an end to the first round! Next Saturday will be the second! Don't forget we're having a dinner in three hours. And _no_, King DeDeDe, we are not going to Taco Bell!"

* * *

Bustman: So, how did you like it? The chapters are going to be funnier now that the smashers are away from the ski lodge. Read and review! Oh, and by the way, there's a new poll on bio, titled _Who is your favorite character from this story_. Please vote!


	14. Celebratory Dinner With A Twist!

Bustman: What's up, peoples? That is right, I am _back_! You heard me! Make some noise, ya'll! Wooooot!

(passes out)

Crazy Hand: Hello? Anyone there? Ya listening? Good. See, Bustman is a little loco in the head right now, so I am here instead. Bustman does not own anything, especially not my socks!

Bustman: Damn straight! Read and review! Oh, and I have a challenge for you. I want at least one fifth of the people who click on this story to review it, because anyone can do it! Don't think I'm not referring to you, the reader. If you don't, there is a punishment!!! My next update won't come for another month! I'll just sit around home, drink root beer, and listen to my music, without a care in the world! So, at a minimum, I need 5 reviews! And I _am _a patient person, and I keep my promises! So there!

(passes out once more)

* * *

Luigi straightened his tie, clearing his throat. He looked at himself in the mirror, smiling. Instead of a green cap, he was wearing a black formal hat today, with his hair slicked back. He had combed him moustache and shaved any extra stubble, and had sprayed perfume on himself. He had a rose in his tuxedo, and was wearing black pants and black shoes to go with it. He smiled at himself.

"Poyo!" Kirby snorted from behind him. Luigi turned around. His friend was in a polka-dotted tie, and nothing else.

"Just because you don't like to dress formally…" Luigi smiled. Kirby jumped up and tapped the rose in the plumber's tuxedo.

"Poyo?"

"Well, Kirby, Daisy is going to be at the party tonight." Luigi explained. "So…I just want to look my best, that's all. Anyone from your world coming?"

"Poyo!" Kirby bobbed his head up and down. Luigi smiled.

"Should be a wonderful evening, then."

"Luigi! Are you coming?" Mario's voice called from behind the door. Luigi patted his rose and opened the door.

"Nice rose. It for me?" Mario teased.

"Oh, yes. I was thinking we'd catch a movie and walk down a moonlit beach after the party." Luigi rolled his eyes and pushed past his older brother. Mario jogged back up to him. His usual red cap was missing, and instead was wearing a black jacket with a bow tie.

"Do you and Daisy have any plans for after the party?"

"No." Luigi sighed. "Daisy's going back to her world after the party…"

"Wrong." A voice said from behind them. The two brothers turned to see Peach, walking in a sleeveless orange dress, behind them. "Daisy's staying in me, Zelda and Lyn's room for a week. Master Hand said it was okay if she visited."

"Seriously?" Luigi's eyes lit up. "Well, _that's _ good news."

"Princess, you always know the right thing to do." Mario leaned up and kissed Peach's lips. She giggled.

"Don't forget it."

"Yo!" Link ran up to the small group. He was wearing a white hat with a white jacket on, and a blue shirt beneath it. He stopped next to Luigi.

"Nice rose."

Luigi sighed. "Let's go."

* * *

Kapp'n halted the bus in front of a restaurant entitled **Mickey's**. He opened the bus door, and the smashers piled out. Photographers were flashing pictures, so they all hurried inside. Luigi looked around. It was a very formal place; flowers had been set out on neat white tablecloths covering tables, and the silverware looked very heavy, like it was made out of real silver. People were murmuring quietly at their tables, talking about the prices of corn.

"Handy! How are you, man?" A stout man with a large hat that seemed to be alive suddenly grabbed Master Hand by his… hand, and shook it.

"MC Ballyhoo! Big Top! How are you, my friends?"

"We're swell, just _swell_. So excited to hear about the new game, Big Top here already trying to reserve a copy!"

"Well that's great. Luigi, I assume you already know this guy?"

Luigi walked over. "Hello, Mr. Ballyhoo. Big Top. How are you two?"

"Just dandy! It's an honor to see you again, Mr. Luigi!" MC Ballyhoo eagerly shook Luigi's hand. "Haven't seen you since production of Mario Party 8 ended!"

"It has been a while." Luigi agreed.

"Bally, maybe we should find our table." Master Hand suggested. Ballyhoo eagerly nodded.

"Agreed, agreed…this way, everyone!"

The circus man walked over to a curtain in the wall, and drew it open. Inside was a very large room, with a huge table and many chandeliers. Fox whistled.

"Yes, yes, took a lot of reserving to get this room, you see…"

"It's fantastic!" Marth remarked.

"Yes, it is." Master Hand nodded. "So, when are the other guests coming?"

"Any minute now…oh look, here are the first ones! Come on in, Mr. Toad, Mrs. Toadette!"

A short little red mushroom-shaped creature came into the room, escorting a girl who looked nearly the same, only with braids. The male toad spoke.

"We're not late, are we?"

"No, not in the least! Here, let me take your jackets…" MC Ballyhoo raced over to the two Toads. Mario and Luigi walked up to them as they took off their jackets.

"Toad, Toadette! It's been since forever!" Mario hugged the two, and Luigi followed suit.

"Mr. Mario, Mr. Luigi!" Toad said in a squeaky voice, filled with pleasure. "I have gifts for you two!"

"Oh, Toad, really…you shouldn't have." Luigi kicked at the floor sheepishly. "We didn't get anything for you…"

"No, no, we insist! Here you are!" Toadette spoke, giving the two each a box wrapped in colorful wrapping paper. Luigi unwrapped his, and opened the box. He took out a soccer ball, green and white.

"We heard it was soccer season!" Toad piped up. "We thought you two could use these!"

"Guys…thanks." Luigi wiped a tear away from his eye, looking at his two friends. Mario embraced them both again.

"Oh, no problem, no problem!" Toadette said. "We visited Brazil after our last game, and we saw this in one of the store windows."

"Toad! Toadette!"

"Princess Peach!" The two toads ran up to the princess and hugged her. Luigi turned to Mario.

"That was thoughtful of the two."

"Yeah…we're lucky to have such good friends back in the Mushroom Kingdom."

"What's up, plumbers?"

The two brothers turned around. A tall, red man with a tuxedo on was clamping both of their shoulders.

"Roy! I didn't think you'd be here!"

Roy smiled. "Marth invited me over here. It's been a while since I've seen you two, hasn't it?"

"It has, it has. Care for a drink?" Mario had poured himself a glass of wine, and was now holding out one to Roy. He shook his head.

"No, I'm trying to stop drinking. Put me through hell, but best for my health." Roy looked over to Marth and grinned. Ike was cowering behind Roy's friend, trying not to pay attention to Roy. Roy gave out a bark-like laugh.

"Seems like 'ol Ike is still afraid that I'm angry about him stealing my smasher status. I'll see you guys." Roy walked away towards Marth.

More people were now arriving. Link was leaning down and talking to a small green elf that Luigi faintly remembered had appeared as an assist trophy last year, while Zelda chatted with a tall dark woman who Luigi remembered was named Midna. Kirby was hugging two kids that were wearing nametags titled Tiff and Tuff, and Captain Falcon was talking with a tall woman who was named Jody Summer. Luigi picked up some chicken wings from the food table and put it on his plate. He sat down in one of the foldout chairs.

"Having fun?" Fox sat down next to Luigi, dipping his spoon into some peas.

"Waiting for a special guest to arrive." Luigi gave a meek smile.

"You want me to phone Bustman? I can tell him to make her arrive in this story…"

"Fox, may I remind you, there is a fourth wall that we need not break." Snake said wryly, sitting down on the other seat next to Luigi.

"Snake." Luigi nodded. "Don't you have guests coming?"

"The Colonel." Snake sighed. "He said he would be coming late, but truthfully, I don't want him to come at all."

"Why?"

"See for yourself." Snake handed Luigi his codec. Luigi pressed the **Connect** button.

"er…Colonel?"

"Snake, is that you? Watch out for the purple rope snake! It's actually a vampire!"

"Colonel, there's no rope snake here…"

"That's what it _wants_ you to think! And, by the way, are there Krispy Kreme donuts there?"

Luigi scanned the room. "No…"

WHAT!" The colonel's voice shouted from the codec. "I SPECIFICALLY ASKED YOU 3 SECONDS AGO FOR KRISPY KREME DONUTS!!!"

"AAAAAUUUUGGGHHH!" Luigi dropped the codec. Snake caught it in his outstretched hand and put it away.

"See what I mean?"

"More then I'd like to have…" Luigi groaned. "Let's hope he's not coming any time _soon_…"

"Snake, did you make Luigi have a conversation with the colonel?" Link walked up to them, grinning. He turned to Luigi. "I remember when he did that to me. I nearly had a nervous breakdown afterwards."

"Ike _did_." Snake grinned. "I remember the paramedics had to come in and calm him down."

"Well, come on out then. A nice cup of wine will calm you down." Link poured a glass of wine for Luigi, and then headed toward the courtyard outside the restaurant. Luigi followed, deciding some fresh air would do him some good. Link leaned against the restaurant wall, sipping his wine.

"What's new?" Luigi asked, sipping his wine.

"Nothing much. Tingle had to many sodas, and he passed out. Made a big show of it too." Link grinned. "It's nice to be with people from our world again."

"Agreed." Luigi took another sip of wine. "Roy came in, did you see?"

"Oh, yeah. Ike nearly fainted when he walked up to him." Link laughed. "The look on his face was close to priceless. It was nice to be with Roy again. Do you remember in the production of melee, me, Marth and Roy…?"

"I'd rather not." Luigi laughed. "You three were the ones always pulling pranks."

"The prankster gang, they called us." Link smiled at the memory. "Remember that one time we left out that 'treasure map' for Ganondorf to see?"

"Yeah. I don't think he was expecting live cobras for the buried treasure." The two men barked with laughter.

"You also played your fair share of pranks on me." Luigi reminded him. Link grinned.

"That's right. We dyed your suit pink, didn't we?"

"Wouldn't come out for a week." Luigi smiled. "Well, at least that's better then what you did to Mario's."

"Oh, yes. We painted flowers and bunnies on his. That was ravishing." The two men laughed again.

"Well, we'd better be going back in." Luigi picked up his glass of wine and nodded towards the door. "See how the party is faring."

"You're right, I guess." Link picked up his glass, and the two green-clad heroes walked back into the restaurant. It was starting to get crowded, and it was very noisy. Suddenly, Luigi heard a familiar voice.

"Luigi!"

Luigi turned, grinning. "Daisy!"

The two kissed each other, and then stepped back. Luigi scanned Daisy over. She was in a long red dress, and her hair was tied up in a ponytail. She was smiling exuberantly.

"Luigi, it's been so long!"

"It has, it has! How are things faring Sarasaland?"

"It's been great. Everyone's been excited upon hearing about this new game." She smiled, and then waved to Mario, who was chatting with Marth in the distance.

"Oy, Mario!"

"Daisy!" Mario walked over, finishing his discussion with Marth. "How are you?"

"Good, good, you?"

"Absolutely fantastic!" Mario grinned. "Did you join the Mushroom Kingdom soccer team?"

"Sure did! I already checked; in two weeks, we'll be playing against you guys."

"We'll look forward to it." Luigi nodded. "Both me and Mario made the cut."

"That's great! Oh, Peach, over here!" Daisy waved over to Peach.

"Let's give them some girl time." Mario whispered to Luigi, and the two walked away.

"Mario! Luigi!"

"Rosalina! How are you?" The two plumbers said in unison. Rosalina smiled.

"Just fine. Mario, there's a special someone who wants to say hello to you."

"Luma!" Mario laughed as the white luma he had traveled around the galaxy with flew around him excitedly. "How are _you_?"

"Luma! Wheee!" The luma continued flying around. Mario and Luigi laughed aloud, and even the calm Rosalina couldn't prevent a small smile from coming on to her face.

"Attention! Everyone! Please take a seat." Master Hand said in a loud voice. Mario sat down, the luma lying in his lap. Rosalina sat next to him, and Luigi sat on his other side. Daisy sat down next to the green-clad plumber.

"Enjoying yourself so far?" Luigi asked.

"Definitely." Daisy smiled. Master Hand spoke again.

"As you all know, we are gathered here tonight to celebrate the start of Super Smash Brothers Fray. I'd like to thank everyone who made this possible, because I couldn't have done this on my own. I'd like to thank all of the smasher's cooperation and devotion, even if they were a bit reluctant at first. I know that this will be the best game yet, deep down. Thank you."

"Here, here!" Link raised up his glass. Luigi clanked his glass with Mario, Peach, Daisy, Rosalina, and Yoshi.

"Without further ado, let the feast begin!"

* * *

Bustman: So, how'd you like it? It's the first chapter since the fourth that wasn't in Link's point of view. Tell me in a review if you would like more or less chapters in someone else's point of view. Thanks, and remember, review!


	15. Tayce T's

Bustman: Yo! Peoples, what is up?! I'm very happy because the last chapter of Life In Smash Mansion got more reviews then any other chapter I've ever published, earning a whopping 7 responses! But, we're going to try to top that, right?

Marth: Yeah, sure, whatever, right.

Bustman: Exacatamundo! And I have more good news! We've reached our half-hundred mark for reviews! I'm so happy, I could shout out loud with joy!

Marth: Please, save it for another time.

Bustman: Oh, stop being so pessimistic. Do the disclaimer.

Marth: Bustman does not own anything. All characters belong to their respective owners.

Bustman: That's right! Read and REVIEW!!!! Oh, and I am so sorry. I'm so late. I hope you don't hate me for it… so, to try to make up, I made this chapter a long one. Enjoy!

* * *

"Goal!"

CRASH!!!

Link shook his head as another soccer ball slammed Bowser in the gut.

"I'm okay… kind of…" Bowser groaned, getting up and dusting himself. Funky Kong sighed.

"Yo man, we're going to have to flipflop if you keep on taking the beehive with a twist."

"Sorry." Bowser sighed.

"Just try to avoid it in the future. Okay, team, let's close this practice! We have a game tomorrow, a day early! I want 50 jumping jacks, 20 push-ups, and 20 sit-ups!"

The team started doing jumping jacks. Isaac, who had replaced Waluigi after he gave up his substitute position for referee, jumped over to Link.

"What's up, man?" Isaac said, continuing his jumping jacks. Link shrugged.

"Not much. Our first game ought to be an interesting one."

"I can imagine." Isaac stopped doing jumping jacks and began his push-ups. "Yo, sword training after practice?"

"Be happy to." Link grunted, getting down on his hands and starting his push-ups. Isaac saw Link as his mentor of sword fighting, and looked up to him. However, he wasn't clingy, and Link liked his jolly, outgoing attitude. The two had become friends, despite their 5-year age difference. Link rolled over and began doing sit-ups.

"You think Marth and Sonic could join?" Isaac grunted.

"I'm pretty sure…" Link nodded. Marth had been mentoring Sonic with a sword to prepare for an upcoming game, so they spent nearly a quarter of the day training.

"Alright!" Funky Kong shouted. "Thank you all for coming to practice! Tomorrow, Hyrule will be coming to play here, and on the field first will be: King DeDeDe as goalie, Krystal, Yoshi, and Dixie Kong as defense, Sonic, Samus and Marth on midfield, and Mario, Luigi, Link and Isaac as offense. Bowser, Wolf, and Falco will be put in later. Got it?"

The team nodded.

"Alright. You are all dismissed."

Link and Isaac walked up to Marth and Sonic.

"Hey, guys." Marth waved. "We were just heading off to sword practice. Want to come?"

"That was just what we were here to ask." Isaac nodded.

"Alright then." Marth gave a wave of his hand. "Wait just a second while I change, and then we'll be on our way."

* * *

Ike continued to look out at the setting sun. He was up on Starlight Hill, his haven for when things were getting out of control at the mansion. Ike had nearly had a heart attack when he found Roy had been at the party last night. Ike had remembered how angry he had been when he found he had been replaced, and the evil glares Roy shot him while he was packing. Roy had seemed to have gotten over it, but Ike still didn't know; he might've had a mood swing and punched Ike, or something along those lines.

Ray crawled up into Ike's lap and rolled over. Ike smiled scratched his belly. It was nice to have a companion that never left his side. Dogs _were_ man's best friend.

Suddenly, there was a blinding flash of silver light. Ray jolted his head up and barked. Ike squinted his eyes. A brilliant shining aura was floating in front of him, which Ike somehow found familiar. The ball of light suddenly started to take form; a body started to grow, then arms, then hands, then legs and feet; and finally, a head sprouted up. Long silver hair grew out of it, and brilliant blue eyes appeared. Ike stood in shock for a minute, and then gasped; "Ashunera!"

"Yes, Ike." Ashunera gave a small smile. "How do you do?"

Ike bowed his head and knelt before the goddess. "I-I am well, your highness."

Ashunera held out one slim finger and lifted Ike's head up. "It has been a while."

"So it has…" Ike's voice trembled, and he smiled. "What brings you here, Ashunera?"

The goddess sighed. "I do not bear good news, I am afraid…"

Ray whimpered and barked at the mysterious silver creature. Ashunera knelt down and stroked Ray, who seemed to relax a little bit, but still hid behind Ike.

"What is the bad news then, m'lady?" Ike asked. Ashunera straightened up.

"Ike, you will be returning here much, I will start by saying." Ashunera paused. "…Problems are going to arise at the mansion, Ike. You will feel like you are being split in two, and, on top of that, one smasher is not the person you thought of him or her. Tension will surround you, and you will feel helpless to do anything. Heed this warning, Ike, and prepare for it; because there is nothing you can do to stop it."

"Wha-why?" Ike staggered back. Ashurna gazed at him, and then brushed his cheek with her hand.

"Because it has already begun."

And just like that, she disappeared. Ray whimpered again. Ike shook his head and stood up. He had gone to Starlight Hill to let his problems melt away; instead, more seemed to pile on. He sighed. Wasn't there any safe haven anymore?

He walked back down to the mansion, Ray tagging along, looking back like he expected the unfamiliar silver lady to appear again. The back of the mansion came into view, and Ike spotted Isaac, Marth, Link, and Sonic sword training.

"Let the fight begin!" Isaac blew a whistle. Sonic started repeatedly attacking Marth with his sword, but Marth quickly blocked all of his blows.

"Less predictable moves, how about?" Marth grunted. Sonic sneered.

"You can't beat me!"

"Oh, can't I?" As Sonic jabbed the fencing sword at Marth's head, Marth leaned his head out of the way, so the sword stabbed midair. While Sonic was exposed, Marth kicked him over, and then pointed the sword at Sonic's neck.

"Marth wins!" Isaac announced. Sonic got up and brushed himself.

"Alright, maybe I _do_ need a bit more training…" Sonic said unwillingly.

"You got to use your noggin!" K.K. said, who was watching the practice sipping lemonade. "You're just randomly jabbing!"

"Oh, what do you know about sword fights?"

"I travel." K.K. said simply. "I get around. I spent four years playing in Altea, the land of swordfights."

"I bet I could beat you!" Sonic bragged. "You're to slow!

"We'll see about that." K.K. picked up a sword. Isaac cleared his throat.

"Let the fight begin!"

Sonic began jabbing at K.K., who smartly countered each move. He jumped over one of Sonic's cuts, and then landed on the other side of the hedgehog. He thrust his sword at Sonic's exposed back, but Sonic turned at the last second and disarmed K.K.. He jabbed at him, but K.K. ducked, and quickly picked up his sword as Sonic tried to land another blow. He rolled out of the way, and then countered another blow from Sonic's blade. Sonic tried to jab at him again, but as he stretched out his arm, K.K. jumped aside kicked the sword out of Sonic's hand. He then headbutted the hedgehog and pointed the sword directly above his heart.

"What'd I tell you?" K.K. smirked. Sonic angrily threw his sword down.

"Look, I'm not meant for sword fighting! Speed is my game, not offensive maneuvers!"

"You have to try to incorporate the two!" Link, who had been sitting on the grass watching, argued.

"Link's right." Marth agreed. "You have to know some offense. Super speed won't ensure your survival forever."

Sonic sighed. "Oh, fine."

Marth smiled. "Good. We'll practice again tonight."

"Alright. See you guys." Sonic wiped his forehead with a towel and then sped away.

"What's up, Ike?" Link asked, who had just noticed the blue-haired swordsman watching from a lawn chair.

Ike had already made up his mind not to talk about the encounter he had had with Ashunera, at least not in public. "Not much."

"Hey, you guys want to catch that new movie coming to town? _Bolting In Twilight_?" K.K. perked up. Link shook his head.

"I can't. Me and Zelda have a double date with Luigi and Daisy."

Ike thought he caught a bitter look on Marth's face, but it passed so quickly he was sure he must have imagined it.

"Alright. Marth, Ike, Isaac? You guys up for it?"

Ike shrugged. "Alright, I'm not doing anything else tonight."

Marth nodded. "Sounds like a plan."

Isaac looked uneasy. "But, you guys…tonight's Halloween."

Marth looked at him, puzzled. "So?"

Isaac uneasily looked around. "So, aren't you guys going to trick or treat?"

Marth burst out laughing. "Isaac, you're 17! Aren't you a bit old to trick or treat?"

"I'll never be to old to pass up the opportunity for free candy." Isaac stubbornly stuck out his chin. Ike shrugged.

"If you want to go trick or treating, no one's stopping you. I guess just the three of us will go."

"Okay." K.K. confirmed. "I'll see you guys tonight."

* * *

Link straightened his red tie. He was wearing a black button-up shirt, and a white jacket to go along with it. Suddenly, Link saw Marth leaning against the ajar bathroom door.

"Well, look who's dressing up tonight!" Marth grinned. "Where are you four going out to dinner?"

Link smiled and turned around. "Tayce T.'s Diner. It's in the town next to ours."

Marth looked surprised. "That's one of the classiest, most expensive restaurants around! That place costs a fortune!"

Link smiled. "Luigi says he and Mario have a special in with the owner. Said Mario helped her out in a jam once."

"A jam?"

"I don't know. Some missing frying pan or something." Link straightened his tie. "How do I look?"

Marth gave a small smile. "I think Zelda will be very pleased."

"Alright. Thanks, man." Link walked out of the bathroom. Ike was sitting in a chair, staring out the window.

"Ike? You alright, man?"

Ike turned. His blue eyes looked troubled. "Link, there's something I need to tell you…"

Suddenly, a car honked outside. Link smiled.

"Later, alright, man? See you. Have fun at your movie!"

Link ran out the door, and pressed the button for the elevator. He rode it down into the lobby, and then raced out. Zelda, in a sleeveless white dress, Luigi, in a tuxedo, and Daisy, in a long flower-dotted dress, were waiting for him.

"Glad you're here, man." Luigi clamped a hand on Link's shoulder. "We have to get to the restaurant soon; our reservations are for 45 minutes from now, and it's a 40 minute drive."

"Well, then, let's hurry." Link nodded.

"Oh, I actually don't think we have to…" Luigi grinned. The four walked out to the driveway. Parked in it was a bright red Ferrari. Link stared at it for a minute, and then grinned.

"A Ferrari?"

"I like a fast set of wheels." Luigi smiled. "This should cut the time we get there in nearly half."

Link laughed. "Alright. I call shotgun!"

The four got into the car, and the engine roared to life.

"Buckle up." Luigi grinned. He stepped on the gas pedal, and the car shot forward.

"This is insane!" Zelda laughed, in the backseat.

"Fun, isn't it?" Daisy grinned, sitting next to her.

"This is _your_ car?" Link grinned. Luigi nodded.

"It turns out with every haunted mansion you acquire, you also get a free Ferrari." Luigi grinned.

Going 80 miles per hour, the four got to the restaurant in 25 minutes. The four entered the sliding doors.

"Well, my, my, if it isn't Luigi!"

An elderly old toad walked up to Luigi wearing a long dress. Luigi smiled.

"It's good to see you, Tayce."

"Oh, and you to! And these must be your friends?"

"Yes." Luigi turned to Zelda, Daisy and Link. "This is Daisy, this is Zelda, and this is Link."

"Well wonderful! Let's find you a seat."

"Okay," Luigi pulled out his wallet, but Tayce T. shook her head.

"Darling, you know I would never charge an old friend! Right this way."

"Are you sure?" Luigi asked.

"Positive, positive! Come with me."

The old short Toad ushered the party through the restaurant, and to the back.

"Take a seat, take a seat." Tayce T. sat them down. "And here are some menus."

"Thank you, Tayce T.." Luigi put down his napkin in his lap. Tayce T. shook her head.

"Anytime, anytime. Which one of these pretty ladies is your girlfriend?"

Luigi gave a slight chuckle. Daisy grinned.

"He got stuck with me."

"Well congratulations, darlin, you're seeing a good man. Your server will be here in a second."

Tayce T. walked away. Luigi gave a slight wave.

"She's certainly a friendly lady…" Link grinned. Luigi nodded.

"The sweetest old toad I know. I used to eat over at her place all the time." Luigi said.

"In that case, what do you recommend?" Zelda asked, staring at the menu. Luigi looked over his.

"The maple shrooms are good appetizers. Ooh, and the Koopa Tea is the best you'll find anywhere!"

"How's the spicy soup?" Link asked. Luigi immediately licked his lips.

"That's Mario's personal favorite. Made from the finest fire flower pulp you'll find anywhere!"

"In that case, I'll take some of that…" Link murmured. "Oh, and I think I'll order the shroom steak…"

"Oh, that looks delicious. I'll share with you." Zelda looked at Link's menu. "And I'll take some of the koopa Tea and the honey shrooms."

"Honey shrooms sound good. I'll share." Daisy stated.

Just then, the server, a short red toad in a tuxedo walked up. "Are you fine folks ready to order your appetizers and drinks?"

"I think so." Luigi confirmed. "I'll take the Koopa Tea and the Boiled Egg."

"Good choice, sir," the toad nodded. He turned to Link. "Are you ready, sir?"

"Yes, thank you. I'll take the spicy soup and some tasty tonic."

"And you, ma'am?"

Zelda looked at the menu. "I'll have the koopa tea and the honey shrooms."

"And I'll share the honey shrooms with her, and have a special shake." Daisy said. The toad nodded.

"Very good. Your food will be coming shortly."

The toad walked away. Link laid back in his chair.

"So, how's the soccer team in the Mushroom Kingdom, Daisy?"

Daisy grinned. "It' s doing very well. Me and Birdo are coaching as well as playing."

"Are Yoshi and Birdo still together?" Zelda asked. Daisy nodded.

"Oh, yes. He's actually took the train out and visited her a couple of times in the Mushroom Kingdom."

"That would explain why he wasn't at soccer practice last week." Link grumbled. Zelda touched his arm.

"Oh, give him a break. He has a personal life as well. "And as Peach would say…" Zelda mimicked Peach's hyper, gushy voice. "_Those two make the cuuuuutest couple!!!!"_

The whole table laughed. Suddenly, the four heard a group of kids outside the restaurant.

"TRICK OR TREAT!!!"

"Oh, I'll get some candy!" Tayce T. rushed past their table and into a kitchen. She emerged with a basket of lime candies. Daisy looked at Luigi, puzzled.

"I though Halloween was last Friday…?"

Luigi chuckled. "Oh, right. Around these parts, we celebrate Halloween Nov. 2nd."

Daisy scratched her head. "Why?"

Link grinned. "Oh, _this_ is a good story. Years ago, the local theater got very mad at the town."

Zelda nodded. "You see, it was a tradition that every new movie would be released on Friday, but unfortunately, on Halloween night, nobody came to the theaters."

"All of the kids were out trick or treating, and their parents were accompanying them." Luigi added. "Therefore, no one went to the movies, and they didn't make any money."

"So, the local theaters pleaded to the town hall to have Halloween moved to Sunday." Link grinned. "This is the insane part."

Zelda laughed. "The town hall refused their requests, so the theaters refused to play _any _movies until their plea was answered."

Luigi nodded. "This went on for nearly _5 months_, and whenever anyone wanted to see a new release, they had to drive to take a train to a different city, which was a big pain."

"So eventually the town hall gave in, and moved Halloween to Sunday. Pretty crazy, huh?" Link concluded. Daisy snorted.

"Wow. And it's been going on like that for how many years now?"

"Ten. Ten years." Luigi responded. Suddenly, the server Toad came back, holding some drinks and food.

"Your orders, sir, madams." The toad put down the dishes in front of their respective owners.

"Thank you." Luigi nodded. "This looks great."

"Tell me if you need anything." The toad rushed away. Zelda took a bite of the honey shroom.

"Oh, god, this is great!" Zelda sighed. Link took a spoonful of his Spicy Soup; immediately, his taste buds jumped to life.

"Good, isn't it?" Luigi grinned, sipping his Koopa Tea. Link nodded as he gulped down his tasty tonic.

"Hey, Luigi, that's you!" Daisy suddenly pointed up to the television. The TV showed Luigi fighting Mario at one of last year's tournaments. Luigi kicked Mario, only to be hit by a super jump afterwards. Luigi then sucked Mario up in his tornado attack, and while Mario was recovering, hit him with a Luigi Missile. Mario flew off the screen. Link, smiling, looked over at the real Luigi; his smile immediately dropped off his face. Luigi was looking pale and frightened; his face was drained of any color. Link leaned in towards Luigi while Zelda and Daisy continued talking.

"What's up, man?"

Luigi put on a weak smile. "What…what are you talking about?"

Link bore his eyes into Luigi. Luigi sighed.

"Come out in the front with me."

Link nodded. He excused himself from the table, and he and Luigi walked out the restaurant door. Link turned to Luigi.

"Man, you looked terrible inside of there. What is it?"

Luigi sighed. "Link, do you want to be here?"

Link stared at Luigi, puzzled. "Of course I do. I didn't like the idea much at first, but it's good fun."

Luigi looked sadly at Link. "You really think it is?"

"You don't?"

Luigi sighed and stroked his moustache. "Some parts of it are, yes."

"Some parts of it?"

Luigi sighed. "Link, I'm a Quaker."

Link stared in shock at Luigi for a few seconds. "What?"

"I don't believe in fighting, damn it!" Luigi pounded the side of the restaurant with his fist. "I don't want to!"

Link looked at Luigi for a second. "Well, then, why did you sign up?"

Luigi groaned. "I don't know. I really don't know. I was young and stupid when I signed on to the first game. I was tired of being recognized as 'Mario's Little Brother' or 'That Green Plumber Dude'. I wanted to make something of myself. I wanted to _be_ someone. I wanted recognition, fame, to go down in history!!!" Luigi slumped down. "So I had to chose. I had to chose between my beliefs, and my ache for all of that."

Link looked at Luigi as tears trickled down the plumber's eyes. "Luigi… no one's _actually_ getting hurt. It's just a simulation."

"It still goes against my principles." Luigi replied. "It still doesn't feel right. I feel so sickened, so _angry_ at myself when I see playbacks of my fights…"

Link stayed silent for a second. "Do you know about Starlight Hill?"

Luigi looked up. "Huh?"

Link smiled. "I'll show you it sometime. It helps me think, and offers solitude from my problems."

Luigi smiled tearfully. "Thanks man."

Link smiled back. "No problem. Let's get back inside; Daisy is probably wondering where in hell you went."

* * *

Bustman: Again, so sorry I'm so late. I hope you enjoyed!


	16. WIN!

Bustman: Sorry I'm so late! The lack of reviews has been disheartening (hint hint to all of you readers out there who haven't been reviewing)… but anyways, I'm here now. Doing the disclaimer today is… me! I don't own anything. Enjoy the chapter! Oh, and a new poll is up on my bio if you want to look at that!

* * *

Link raced out onto the soccer field. The crowd cheered enormously when they saw his face. They started to cheer "Link! Link!" Link spread out his arms and grinned as the crowd went wild. And then suddenly, a soccer ball hit him in the face. Then another, and another. This wasn't right…

"Dude. Dude, wake up. Dude!!!"

Link groaned and blinked. As his eyes became adjusted to the room, he saw Marth, about to whack him again with his pillow.

"I'm up, I'm up!" Link groaned. "Jesus Christ man, what time is it?"

Marth shot a look at the clock. "5:13."

Link yawned. "Who died?"

"Zelda."

Link shot up. "What?" Marth laughed.

"No one died, Link. We're going out to see the sunset."

Link glared at Marth. "Don't scare me like that." Marth clamped his hand on Link's shoulder.

"Got you up, didn't it? Come on, we have to leave soon."

Link yawned and walked to the bathroom. He took a quick shower, the hot water sapping away his tiredness. He turned the faucet and got out of the shower, and threw on a blue T-shirt and a green sweater. He then threw on some underpants and jeans, and slipped on some socks. He opened the bathroom door, hair still wet. Marth handed him a bagel.

"Not hungry." Link mumbled, slipping on some sneakers.

"Come on, our big game is today. You need energy." Marth pressed. Link smacked his forehead.

"That's right! The game!" Link shot another glare at Marth. "We should be resting."

"Oh, come on, don't be such a fuss-budget. Where's the joy in life if you don't watch a sunrise every once in a while?"

Link sighed. "Alright, you win. Let's go."

Link and Marth headed out the door. They quietly walked down the hall, and down the steps. Link started for the door, but Marth caught his arm.

"Out the back."

Link nodded. The two swordsmen crossed through the living room and the kitchen. They were about to exit out the front when a golden lump of fur crashed into Link's leg with such force that the Hyrulian almost fell over.

"Glad you could make it, Ray," Link grumbled, getting up. Ray wagged his tail. Marth opened the door, and the two men and the dog exited. Marth headed towards Starlight Hill, and Link stopped, puzzled.

"How do you know about this place?"

Marth laughed. "I saw Ike coming down this way yesterday. Later, I went up to figure out where it led; it's a pretty hill."

Link yawned. "Whatever. Lead the way, man."

Ray bounded ahead of the two swordsmen, already knowing the path by heart. Link and Marth followed the tireless golden puppy. Within a couple minutes, they were panting up at the top. Marth lay out a towel on the floor, and the two sat down. Ray peed on a tree.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" Marth looked out at the sun, which was beginning to come up. Link yawned.

"Whatever you say, man."

"You don't have to be such a funkill."

"It's 5:30 in the morning!"

"Says Mr. I go to the cafeteria at 2:30 in the morning to meet my girlfriend and wake my roommates up!"

Link groaned. "I woke you guys up?"

Marth grinned. "Honestly, your _horse_-"

"-Can tiptoe quieter than you, yeah." Link recited with Marth. The two stared defiantly at one another for a couple of seconds and then cracked up.

"Well, at least you've never had to room with Donkey Kong." Link chuckled. "He snores like an elephant choking on a peanut, while playing the trombone terribly."

"When have you ever roomed with DK?"

"First game," Link responded. "I eventually started sleeping out here. This hill brings back some powerful memories."

"What, did you lose your virginity on it?"

Marth cracked a grin as Link's face turned red. "Now that's going over the line!"

Link tackled Marth, who was still laughing, and the two wrestled on the hill. Ray barked and ran into the midst.

"I'm sorry! I had to! It was a golden opportunity! Oh, that was great!" Marth was laughing so hard tears were rolling down his face. Link, as hard as he was trying to be angry, had to crack a smile.

"There are times when you should keep your mouth shut, you know." Link got off Marth. Marth got up and dusted himself.

"And what times are they?"

"All of them."

Marth continued to chuckle as the two sat back down, facing the rising sun.

BUZZ!

"And that ends the third quarter, folks! Both teams will be given a five minute break!"

The Hyrulian team confidently walked back to their end, where their coach, Midna, was smiling happily. The score was three to five; they were up two points. The smash brothers, with glum faces, walked back to their end.

"Yes, and I'd like pepperoni on one of those, and mushroom on half of one… yes, all four extra large…" Funky Kong spoke into his cellphone as the team walked over to them. "…Yes, you too. Bye."

Funky Kong hung up his cell phone and grinned as the team walked over to them. "There are my winners! How much are we up by?"

"Funky Kong, have you even been paying attention to the game?" Samus asked. Funky Kong shook his head.

"I figured you guys would beat the crap out of them, so I've been ordering celebration pizzas and cakes!" Funky Kong said cheerfully. "What's eating you guys?"

"Funky Kong, we're down by two." Marth said.

Funky Kong's smile fell off his face. "So, you mean, I spent $200 on celebration food for nothing?"

"I'll still eat it!" King DeDeDe perked up. "Did you order tacos?"

"NO, I DID NOT ORDER TACOS!!!!" Funky Kong shouted, grabbing King DeDeDe and shaking him. "WHY AREN'T YOU GUYS WINNING! I SPECIFICALLY ASKED YOU TO WIN!"

"Funky Kong, they can't help it if they're terrible!" Sonic said. "Just send me in, and I'll score _and _block the goal!"

Funky Kong, eyes wild with rage, took Sonic by the leg, spun him around, and threw him. Sonic soared out beyond the soccer field, heading towards the ocean. The team watched as he became a tiny speck in the distance.

"Any _more_ stuck –up, wanna-be good losers?" Funky Kong snorted. King DeDeDe raised his hand, and Funky Kong proceeded to knock him out with the substitute bench.

"Just when I thought our team's IQ couldn't get any lower…" Falco muttered. Funky Kong picked him up and punted him towards Starlight Hill.

"Anyone else?" Funky Kong hissed. Everyone shook their heads.

"THEN GO ON OUT THERE AND WIN ME THAT GAME!!!!"

The team scrambled out onto the field, many of them stumbling in the rush to get as far away from Funky Kong as possible.

"And we're back! The current score is Smash Brothers: 3, Hyrulians: 5. Let the game begin!"

Dixie Kong quickly passed the ball to Samus, who ran it up toward the goal. However, a Stalfos stole it, and ran it the opposite direction. Yoshi, however, extended his tongue and ate one of his leg bones. The whole skeleton fell apart. Yoshi then ran it up the field, and passed to Luigi. Luigi avoided Skull Kid, who was trying to steal the ball, and passed to Mario, who shot it. The postman blocked it.

"DAMN IT! I NEED THIS GOAL!!!" Mario shouted, running up and shooting the ball again. The ball smacked the postman in the face, and he fell over. The ball rolled into the goal.

"A fluke for the smash brothers, bumping their score up to 4!" The reporter said excitedly. The smash brother fans cheered. The Hyrule fans booed.

"Wha-what's going on?" King DeDeDe raised his head up groggily. Funky Kong slammed him in the face with his surfboard, and he collapsed to the ground once more.

A Redead took the ball now. Yoshi dove to take the ball, but the Redead jumped over the green dinosaur, and passed the ball to a Hyrule Guard. The Hyrule Guard ignored Dixie Kong trying to attack him and shot. Wolf dove.

"NOOOOOOOO!"

He missed.

"Hyrule scores another goal! The score is now 6-4! Three minutes on the clock!"

Wolf saw Funky Kong turning red. The ape began to storm toward him.

"Aaaaah! DON'T KILL ME!!!" Wolf threw the door as hard as he could. The postman was high-fiving the Hyrule Guard, and failed to notice the ball. The ball landed near the goalie square.

The postman and the Hyrule Guard began to chat.

Luigi and Ilia both dove for the ball, but ended up tackling each other as the ball rolled past them.

The postman gasped as the Hyrule Guard made a crude joke.

Dark Link ran for the ball, but suddenly Link ran up behind him.

"DIE!!!!!" Link shouted, tackling his dark twin. The two fell to the floor. The ball rolled past them into the goalie square. Now only the goalie could touch it.

"Oh crap, oh crap, oh, crap, oh crap…." Wolf muttered as Funky Kong threw Yoshi out of the way to approach Wolf.

"Postman! The ball!" Ashei yelled. The postman threw her a confused look.

Funky Kong rolled up his sleeves to strangle that filthy, no-good goalie…

The ball rolled very near the goal.

The postman turned around, saw the ball inches away from the goal, and gaped.

"Dive for it, you imbisol!" King Bulbin shouted from the sidelines. The postman dived for the ball, but misaimed his jump. He landed in front of the ball, which had come to a halt in front of the goal. However, the surrounding ground shook as the postman landed, and the ball rolled a couple more centimeters, into the goal.

"UNBELIEVABLE!!!" The postman shouted, as the smash brother fans went crazy. "Unbelievable! Wolf scores a goal from the other side of the field!"

Funky Kong, his mood suddenly uplifted, gave Wolf a bear hug instead of strangling him.

"The score is now 5-6! Now that the smash brothers have worked one miracle, can they work another, scoring two points in one minute and a half?"

"Yes we can!" King DeDeDe shouted. "Yes we can! Yes we can! Yes we can! Yes we- is that a taco?" King DeDeDe stumbled toward the bleachers.

King Bulbin, who had replaced the postman as goalie, threw the ball to Ashei. Ashei dribbled it down the field, but Samus stole it, and passed to Isaac. Isaac dribbled it down the field, and passed to Luigi, who shot it. King Bulbin, however, blocked it, gave a roar of triumph, and threw the ball to Skull Kid. Skull Kid gave a fantastic kick to the other side of the field, headed straight toward the goal, but Wolf blocked it.

"30 seconds!" The reporter announced. "The odds of the smash brothers winning this game now is one thousand to one!"

Wolf tried to throw it into the goal again, but Ashei jumped up and stole it at midfield. However, Bowser breathed fire onto the field, and Ashei abruptly stopped as the ground in front of her burst into flame.

"Ha! You like that? Didn't think so-what the?" Bowser looked down to see that he had caught on fire. "OH MY GOD, I'M ON FIRE! STOP DROP AND ROLL! STOP DROP AND ROLL! THIS IS EXACTLY LIKE CHAPTER SEVEN!"

Bowser ran dropped onto the ground and rolled. His shell hit the ball, and it flew into the goal.

"Goal! The smash brothers have tied the game! Can either team win with just fifteen seconds left?"

King Bulbin, in rage, threw the ball extremely hard. Bowser was just getting up, burned and scarred, when the ball flew straight toward him.

"AAARRGGHHH!" Bowser shouted. The ball flew straight into his mouth.

"And here's a twist! Bowser has swallowed the ball! There are nine seconds left on the clock!"

Bowser made a strange groaning noise, and began to cough.

"Seven seconds!"

Bowser made a hacking noise.

"Five seconds!"

And suddenly, the ball flew out of the koopa's mouth, but wasn't in the same condition it was when it flew into his mouth. It was on fire, and heading, at an incredible speed, toward the goal.

"Three!"

Dark Link, Ilia, and Stalfos jumped out of the way of the fireball. It headed toward the goal.

"Two!"

King Bulbin prepared himself for the record-fast ball. "Come on, hit me, hit me…"

"One!"

"HIT ME!" King Bulbin shouted, eyes closed. The ball did just that. It hit his chest, and the ball flew into the goal, taking King Bulbin with it.

"And it's good! With two milliseconds left, the smash brothers win!"

Everyone, in shock, gaped at Bowser. Finally, Luigi jumped up excitedly.

"WE WON!!!"

The home crowd went wild. The team ran to Bowser, and shared a huge group hug with him. Many cries of pain were heard from the people who attempted to hug his spiky shell.

"Bow_ser_! Bow_ser_! Bow_ser_!" Link started to cheer, and the team eagerly followed. King Bulbin ran around on fire somewhere in the distance. The smash brother team tried to hoist Bowser onto their shoulder, but they scratched that idea almost immediately and settled for patting him on the back instead. Then, the team proudly marched off the field, and King DeDeDe waddled after them.

* * *

"Yeah! Let's party! I rock! I rock!" Bowser opened another bottle of champagne. A huge, outdoor party was taking place outside the smash mansion. The stars twinkled in the dark sky as the smashers celebrated. Wolf and Samus were square dancing, as well as Luigi and Daisy. Sonic was pleading to K.K. Slider to play some breakdancing music.

"Here you go, my good man." Mario put a burger on Meta Knight's place.

"Fantastic." Meta Knight nodded. He prepared to take a bite of the burger, but Ray jumped up and ate it.

"No! Bad dog!" Meta Knight scowled. He got another burger to himself, and kept a firm grip on it this time. He held it up to his mouth, but Ray jumped up and bit his hand.

"YOUCH!!!!!" Meta Knight yelled in pain as his burger fell to the ground. Meta Knight glared at the puppy as it gobbled down his burger.

"One more time, and I swear, we will have to duel!"

Meta Knight grabbed a burger and held it over his head. However, being as short as puffballs are, Ray easily jumped up and ate the burger. Meta Knight burst out into tears.

"Why do you have to rub in my shortness!" The puffball sobbed. "I can't help it if I'm short!"

"Weirdo." Shadow muttered, going back to the barbeque for second helpings. King K. Rool and Leon Powalski were brawling in a clearing near the dance floor.

"Ready, aim, and… fire!" Marth and Link both launched tomatoes aimed for King K. Rool. Link's hit it's target; Marth's splattered all over King DeDeDe's plate.

"Ooh, ketchup!" The large penguin licked it's lips. Louie took a French fry and sampled it.

"Remarkable!" Louie exclaimed.

"You owe me five bucks." Link put forth his hand. Marth grumbled and pulled five bucks out of his wallet.

"Ah, well." The blue haired swordsman sighed. "Ike, bet you five bucks you can't nail Sonic right in the face."

"Bet I can." Ike got up from the towel he was laying down on. The three roommates were on Starlight Hill, and preferred throwing tomatoes at the party then actually joining it. Ike grabbed a tomato and threw it at Sonic. It hit him in the face, and he staggered around, blinded. Louie stuck a French fry into the tomato stuck on his face.

"This is not my night…" Marth mumbled, shuffling through his wallet. He held out a ten for Ike. "Got change?"

"Nope." Ike took the ten and pocketed it. Marth looked at him, dumbstruck. Ike and Link cracked up.

"Very funny. "Marth grumbled. "You're a dead man!"

"Bet you five bucks I'm not!" Ike shouted. Marth tackled Ike, and the two rolled down the hill. Ike then got up and ran toward the party, Marth gave chase.

"Aye carumba." Link shook his head and looked up at the stars. They seemed to be extra bright tonight.

"I don't know how you put up with those two."

Link turned around. Zelda was leaning against a tree trunk, watching Marth and Ike run through the dance floor. Link sighed.

"I don't know either."

Zelda walked over and sat down next to Link. "Congrats on the game, by the way."

Link gave her a small smile. "Pretty sweet fireball, eh?"

"That Bowser is a genius." Zelda chuckled.

"Yeah, it takes real brains to be losing two to one facing a dog." Link peered down the hill.

"No way." Zelda laughed, leaning over to see for herself. Bowser and Meta Knight were trying to grab a burger from Ray, but the small, agile dog kept outwitting them.

"It's not every day you see _that_." Link said, taking out his phone and snapping a picture.

"So, how's life?" Zelda asked, as Link pocketed his phone. Link smiled.

"Life's good. I've been spending a lot of time here lately-not because I'm depressed." Link added in quickly.

"Well, then why?" Zelda asked, leaning back.

"I've just been thinking more lately. This is a nice, peaceful place to think." Link lay down, and leaned on his elbow, facing Zelda. Zelda followed.

"Thinking about what?" Zelda challenged.

"What I want to do in life," Link admitted. "Where I want to go. There's got to be more in life than making video games and saving you."

"Ha-ha, very funny." Zelda said. "Well, what do you want to do?"

"I don't know. We're young; we still have time to figure this kind of stuff out,"

"Mmm." Zelda nodded.

"And then you start thinking…" Link trailed off. "And then you start thinking about other things. Like who you want to spend the rest of your life with. About who you love."

The two stared up at the stars for a minute. Zelda looked boldly, yet shyly at Link.

"Am I the first person that comes to mind?"

Link leaned forward. "Who else?" he whispered.

And then the two were passionately kissing, trying to express all of their love for each other through one movement of the lips. They rolled around on the wet grass, both knowing that one another was who they wanted to spend the rest of their lives with. The stars continued to shine up in the sky.

* * *

Bustman: Ah, a comedic chapter with a romantic twist! What do you call that again?

Wolf: I do believe it's called a romantic comedy.

Bustman: Who asked you? Read and review! R & R!


	17. Fourth Walls

Bustman: Hey, an early update! I owe it to you guys, after the last one took so long. Today doing the disclaimer is… Ganondorf!

Ganondorf: Where are my lines?

Bustman: You don't have any.

Ganondorf: Well then how am I supposed to know what to say?

Bustman: Just disclaim!

Ganondorf: Bustman does not own anything.

Bustman: Good. Now, I'm going to put the following sentence in big letters, capital and bolded. **I WILL NOT UPDATE AGAIN UNTIL I HAVE AT **_**LEAST**_** FIVE REVIEWS**. Everyone hear that? Good. Enjoy the story.

* * *

"Wake up, man. Master Hand is calling a meeting. Wake _up!_"

"I'm awake, I'm awake." Ike grumbled, getting up. Marth sighed.

"You are the heaviest sleeper."

Ike groggily looked around the room. "What happened last night? I can't remember anything."

Marth furrowed his eyebrows as he put on a new shirt. "I remember we were throwing tomatoes… and that's about it."

Ike threw his legs off the bed and got up. "I'm going to shower."

Marth threw a quick look at him as he put on a sweater. "Make it quick. Master Hand said the meeting starts at 8:30, and it's 8:21 now."

Ike nodded and went into the bathroom. He undressed and turned on the shower. The warm water felt good against his skin, and he gave a sigh of content.

"Hurry up, dude! We don't want to be the last ones there!" Marth's voice sounded from outside the bathroom door. Ike quickly cleaned himself with the soap and washed his hair, and then jumped out of the shower. He quickly threw on a shirt and jeans, and then came out of the bathroom. Ray whimpered, circling around the door.

"I'll take you out after the meeting, boy." Ike said as he walked out the door after Marth. He gently shut it, and then faced his friend.

"Where's Link?"

"I have no idea." Marth yawned.

"Maybe he went down already?"

Marth snorted. "Link? Are you kidding me?"

Ike shrugged. The two pressed the down button on the elevator.

"Ike! Marth! How are you two?"

"K.K.! How are _you_?" Ike kindly regarded his friend.

"Pretty swell. I finished the song I was working on last night."

"Yeah, we heard." Marth grumbled. "You need to soundproof your room."

K.K. blushed. "It was really that bad?"

Marth relaxed a bit as the elevator doors slid opened. "Of course not, K.K.. I just meant your guitar playing was keeping me up, that's all."

"Oh. Well, I'm sorry about that." K.K. replied, as the three walked into the elevator. The doors slid shut, and the elevator lurched down.

"Ike, Marth, K.K.! Just on time!" Master Hand noted the three smashers' presence. "Now we're just missing Link and Zelda."

Crazy Hand floated into the hall. "Hey, has anyone seen my missing sock?"

"You don't wear socks, Crazy." Master Hand sighed.

"That's what you think!" Crazy snorted, floating up to the podium. Marth, Ike, and K.K. took their seats.

"Alright, we'll get started without Link and Zelda. I have called this meeting because we need to plan our schedule for the month of November." Master Hand declared.

"But that always bores the reader!" Bustman called out from the audience. "Can we drop down a disco ball and have some tap-dancing hippopotamuses in the background?"

"I'm on it!" Crazy Hand rushed out the door. A disco ball suddenly dropped down and started to spin, flashing lights all over the room, which had suddenly darkened. Some hippos suddenly entered and began to break-dance behind Master Hand. The white hand sighed.

"Great. I can already tell this meeting is going to be productive."

"I feel the same way too!" Crazy Hand spoke happily. "Isn't it a great sensation?"

The hippos began to disco.

"Alright, let's get started!" Master Hand spoke up over the disco music. "This week-"

The door suddenly opened, and Link and Zelda ran in.

"You two are late." Master Hand said strictly. Link blushed.

"We're sorry, Master Hand. But, um, why are there dancing hippos in the background?"

"It's because the world has unexplainably stopped its rotation. The hippo people are coming down, and they're going to merge with the invisible people, to become… THE INVISIBLE HIPPO PEOPLE!!!" Crazy Hand said. Link shot a weird look at the floating hand.

"…Okay." Master Hand shook his head. "Now, today, we have to go to… a press conference."  
Many roars of dismay emerged from the smashers. Master Hand shushed everyone.

"I know it's not good news, but it has to be done. After that, we'll break for lunch, and then we have to go to a digital adaption studio. And then we'll return here, and you can do what you please. Meet here in an hour. Got it?"

The smashers nodded and began to disperse. The disco ball was raised back up, and the hippos left.

Marth went over and began to chat with Link. Instead of joining them, Ike went back upstairs. He opened the door, and Ray leaped up onto him.

"Alright, down boy! I'm taking you out right now!"

Ike put Ray on a leash. He was about to leave, but he heard a voice behind him.

"Excuse me, do you know where the hippo people are?"

Ike gasped and turned around, but no one was in sight. A voice laughed in front of him.

"Oh, so sorry, I forgot to introduce myself. I'm Invisible Person #1. These are my colleagues, Invisible Person #2 and Invisible Person #3."

Ike gaped at where the voice was emitting. "Er…I believe Crazy Hand is in possession of them."

"Thank you so much, friend." The doorknob suddenly turned, the door swung open, and then it closed. Ike shook his head. They must've been a figment of his imagination. He opened the door and left, Ray padding along side him.

"Alright. Good luck to you all."

* * *

The smashers sighed and piled off the bus. Kapp'n gave the salute.

The familiar flashing lights of cameras began to bright up the skies, and millions of fanboys and fangirls screamed.

"Remember! Together now! To the stage!" Pit cried. Isaac gave a war cry.

All the smashers moved at once, slashing at the crowd. A fangirl tried to jump at Ike; he ducked, and she went flying over his head, screaming. A fanboy went running up to him; Ike grabbed him, and threw him back into the crowd. Suddenly, a swarm came running toward him. They all tried to touch Ike, fighting each other to feel his abs. Ike tried to kick them away, but there were to many. Suddenly, he was lifted out of the swarm of fans. He was placed back down safely amongst the rest of the smashers.

"Thanks." Ike muttered. The Balloon Fighter nodded.

"Anything for a fellow smasher."

"This is no time for apologies!" Krystal yelled. "Come on, we're nearly at the stage!"

The smashers continued to fight their way forward. Ike kicked or punched away any crazed fans who got to near. They were extremely close to the stage now.

"Damn it! Link!" Isaac pointed to a green figure in the crowd. Link was being overwhelmed with fans, who ripped his clothes and fought one another to touch him.

"We've got to go back!" Ike shouted. Isaac nodded.

"I'll go with you. Come on!"

The two fought through the crowd. A fan jumped at Ike, but Isaac jumped in the way and kicked him back. Suddenly, a fan jumped onto the young swordsman's back, and he fell to the ground. The fans swarmed. Ike tried to help, but his fans began attacking him as well.

"Isaac!" Captain Falcon shouted, from nearby. No fans were swarming him, much to his confusion. "Here! Smash ball!"

Captain Falcon grabbed a smash ball out of his scarf. He threw it toward the swordsman. Isaac threw some fans off of him, jumped up, and caught it. He crushed it in his hand, and suddenly a red glow emerged around him.

"MEGA MOVER!!!" he shouted. A giant hand came out of his chest, and moved forward. All of the fans were plowed out of the way, giving them a clear path to Link. Ike and Isaac ran behind the giant hand.

"Link!" Ike ran up to the swordsman, who was lying on the ground, gasping for breath. "Are you all right? Speak to me!" Ike slapped him. Link coughed.

"Was that really necessary?" Isaac asked. Ike shrugged.

"I don't know."

Link coughed again. He looked semiconscious. He was bleeding from his arm, his chest, and his shoulder, and had a black eye.

"How the hell do we get him back!?" Ike shouted. He slapped his friend again. Suddenly, a helicopter lowered down. Bustman opened the sliding door of it.

"Get in!" he shouted, over the propellers. "We can't have the main character die!"

Isaac and Ike lifted Link in, and then jumped in themselves. The helicopter lifted up from the crowd, and flew over to the podium. The three swordsmen got out.

"Hold on just a second, Bustman!!!" Julianmon shouted, from another helicopter. "This is story interference! That's just plain wrong!"

"Look who's talking!" Bustman snorted. "You're not even the author of this fanfic!"

"Oh yeah?" Julianmon challenged. "You just had writer block, so you gave yourself a helicopter to provide an escape for the smashers, so you wouldn't have to write another scene!"

"That's it, Julianmon!" Bustman shouted. "This just got personal!" Bustman took out a ray gun and shot at Julianmon. Julianmon backflipped onto Bustman's helicopter, and the two took out swords and began to battle with blades. The helicopter flew up out of the scene, even though no one was driving.

"Huh. And he says _I_ break the fourth wall." Fox snorted.

Master Hand sighed and cleared his throat. "Um, thank you all for coming… I guess."

The crowd cheered.

"Alright, we will now be taking questions. How about you?"

* * *

"That conference was ridiculous." Ike groaned, throwing himself onto the couch. Marth yawned.

"Tell me about it. The infirmary says they'll have to keep Link overnight."

"Just swell," Ike groaned.

"That digital adapting sucked," Marth complained. "They had to X-ray us and scan us for like, what, two hours?"

"Two and a half." Ike groaned.

"I'm sick of making this game," Marth complained. "I need a break."

"Oh, Marth, with that attitude, the story will never progress!" Bustman said, from the outside the open window. Ike shut it, and Bustman fell of the windowsill. A large thump could be heard outside. Marth put on his shoes and walked toward the door. Ike stared at him.

"You can't possibly be going to _check_ on that creep?"

"No," Marth grunted. "I'm going to complain to Master Hand."

"Alright," Ike got up. "I'll come too. Let's give him a piece of us! …or, let's take a piece of him! …or…ah, forget it."

* * *

"Wow, it looks like a lot of smashers are upset…" Ike murmured, as they walked into Master Hand's office. A mob of smashers were complaining to Master Hand, including his brother.

"This work is too hard!!!" Wario moaned.

"When do we get paid?" King DeDeDe yelled.

"My pokémon won't obey me!" Red complained. Yoshi spat at him.

"WHERE ARE MY SOCKS!!!!!!!" Crazy screamed.

"Everyone, settle down!" Master Hand groaned. "Don't I give you _enough_ free time as it is? I've provided you a mansion, for god's sake!"

The mob sniffled.

"Fine, I'll take you all out for a treat. Where do you want to go?"

"The moon!" Olimar shouted.

"Pizza Hut!" Mario cried.

"The circus!" Diddy Kong yelled.

"Water park!" Toon Link suggested.

"Fine." Master Hand sighed. "We'll go to the water park. Happy?"

"No…" Sonic muttered, shivering. He hated water.

"And then we can go to a taco bell!" King DeDeDe said happily.

Master Hand sighed. "Of course, DeDeDe. Okay, everyone, get into the bus. Let's get going."

* * *

Bustman: Bit of a short chapter, I know, but it's a chapter all the same. Hope you enjoyed! REVIEW!


	18. Water Park

Bustman: Here I am, back with another chapter!!! Sorry I'm late, but thanks for all of the reviews you guys have been giving me. I wish I could give you some kind of reward. If you have a suggestion to fix that problem, say it…in a review! Anyway, here's Lucario with the disclaimer.

Lucario: _Bustman does not own nothing._

Bustman: Er, Lou…

Lucario: _Don't call me that_.

Bustman: OK, Lucario, I don't believe that's correct grammar.

Lucario: _What??? That's unpossible!_

Bustman: See, you just did it again.

Lucario: _Hey man, I aren't stupid!!!_

Bustman: See, what we've got here is a failure to communicate.

Lucario: _What we've got here is Yo Momma's face!_

Bustman: Oh no you didn't!

Lucario: _Oh yes I did!_

Bustman: You want to go, man?

Lucario: _Bring it._

Bustman: I would, but this disclaimer is nearly a page long. We've got to start the story. Don't forget to REVIEW!!!! Whenever I put "Review" in caps, it seems to help me get reviews. So I shall be doing it from here on out. So again… REVIEW!!!!!

* * *

"Hey, who pissed in the water?"

"Ha ha! You deserved it."

"What the hell did I do?"

"You mispronounced my name!"

"Well excuse me if I left a 'De' out of 'King DeDeDe!"

Ganondorf watched warily as King DeDeDe and Falco squabbled in the water. Suddenly, he was squirted in the back with a water gun. He turned around to see an 8-year-old kid laughing, holding a watergun.

"You bratty little asshole!!!" Ganondorf screamed. The kid went pale.

"It-it's just water…"

"Water my ass!" Ganondorf started chasing after the kid, who ran as fast as his little legs could carry him. Ganondorf advanced on him and tackled him to the ground. He grabbed the kid's water gun and started squirting him with the liquid. The kid gasped for air. Suddenly, the water ran out. Ganondorf shrugged and started beating the kid with the water gun. Ganondorf gave a satisfied nod as the kid's nose cracked. Then he held the water gun under the unconscious kid's nose, filled it up with blood, and got up.

"GET SOME!!!" he screamed, squirting blood up into the air. He ran after Baby Luigi, who screamed and ran away.

Shadow sat on the park bench, chewing a toothpick and looking at everyone else play in the water. Suddenly Baby Luigi ran up to him, jumped up, bounced off his head over the bench, and kept running. Ganondorf ran up and stopped.

"Come out, come out, wherever you are!" he cackled, squirting blood up into the air. Shadow got up.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"What's it to ya?"

"Let's try this again." Shadow punched Ganondorf in the gut. "What. The. Hell. Do. You. Think. You. Are. Doing?"

"Out of my way, you crotch-licker!"

Meowth looked up from licking his privates. "Hey, it's a cat's way of life, okay?"

"I wasn't talking to you!" Ganondorf roared. He kicked Meowth away.

"Team Rocket is blasting off again!!!" Meowth screamed, disappearing into a star.

As Ganondorf laughed, Shadow roundhouse kicked him in the face. Ganondorf screamed in pain, and Shadow grinned.

"Chaos Blast!"

Shadow unleashed a stream of dark matter in front of him, which threw Ganondorf into one of the benches. It collapsed under his weight.

"Oh, now you're in for it." Ganondorf growled. He grabbed one of the boards and threw it at Shadow, who was busy doing a taunt. It caught him in the gut, and he kneeled over. Ganondorf ran towards him and jumped up into the air.

"Wizard's Foot!"

Ganondorf sped toward Shadow from the air, foot surrounded by dark matter. Shadow was done for sure.

"Wheee!"

Suddenly Ganondorf collided with Diddy Kong, who had just flown off of a waterslide into the air. Ganondorf fell to the ground with a thud while Diddy Kong jumped up and down.

"Again! Agaiiiiiin!" he ran back up to the waterslide. Shadow strolled over to Ganondorf, kicked him in the crotch as hard as he could, and then blended into the shadows.

* * *

"Ahem…testing, 1 2 3… may I have everyone's attention, please?"

Everyone's head turned to the top of a jungle gym, where Captain Falcon was standing.

"We've got a great show for you tonight… so let's get it started, eh? K.K., hit it!"

"I want my money first."

Captain Falcon tossed him a few twenty-dollar bills. "Come on now, let's not keep this crowd waiting…"

K.K. sighed, and started strumming his guitar. Captain Falcon cleared his throat.

"I'm… too sexy for my tush… too sexy for my shirt… so sexy _it hurts_," Captain Falcon tried to break-dance, but ended up only curling up in a ball and spinning around. K.K. rolled his eyes.

"And I'm a model, you know what I mean…" Captain Falcon tried to continue, but his voice was overwhelmed by the 'boos' of the crowd.

"You all have no taste!!!" Captain Falcon shouted. K.K. quietly snuck away as the crowd started to climb up the jungle gym to attack Captain Falcon.

* * *

POP!

"Nice one, Wolf."

"Thanks."

Link, who was still covered in bruises and had a neck brace on from events previous, and Wolf stood in the parking lot with Balloon Fighter. Balloon Fighter was blowing up balloons and releasing them in the air, while Link and Wolf tried to pop them. Link drew his arrow back and released it; it missed a passing by balloon by a couple of inches. Wolf took out his blaster and shot the balloon he had missed.

"Off day, Link?" Wolf growled. Link shrugged. Wolf pressed.

"What's up, Link? Usually your aim on these arrows is flawless."

Link sighed. "You can't tell anyone if I tell you."

Wolf crossed his heart. "Commander's promise."

Link nodded, and hesitantly said. "I got a letter today."

"Yeah?"

Link sighed. "Wolf, I've got to go film another video game next year, during production of the fourth game. It's a contract obligation."

Wolf frowned. "Well, how long are you going to be gone for?"

Link drew a crumpled up piece of paper out of his pocket and glanced at it. "March 17th through May 3rd."

Wolf did some math for a second. "Well, that's not that bad. You're only going to be gone 47 days."

"I know. I'm going to meet you guys on the first stop on your tour."

"Does Master Hand know?"

"Yeah. He's upset I won't be here, but he understands."

"Do Zelda and Ganondorf have to go as well?"

"No. It's a spinoff game. Just me and some new characters." Link grumbled.

"Hey!" Balloon Fighter shouted. "Are you guys going to keep me waiting forever?"

"Sorry," Link called back. He picked up his bow and arrow. He nodded at Wolf.

"Still 5 months before I need to go. Don't worry about it."

Wolf nodded, and picked up his blaster. The two continued to shoot balloons.

* * *

"Bowser, it'll be fine. You just shut your eyes and go down!"

Meta Knight, Marth, Sonic, Isaac, Lyn, Ike, and Bowser were standing at the top of a water slide. Marth, who was on the verge of losing his patience, was trying to instruct Bowser on going down the slide.

Bowser looked into the dark tube, with water pouring down it. "It's awful dark in there…"

"Come on, Bowser, I'm going to go down too." Meta Knight tried to coax his best friend. Bowser gulped.

"Fine, but I'm not going first."

"Finally!" Sonic sighed. He jumped into the tube. "You're too slooooooooooooow!"

Ike gave the salute to his fellow smashers. "See you down there." He jumped down into the water slide.

"Okay… now or never…" Bowser sniffed. He got down to the floor and peered in. Marth gave him a push.

"Wait! I'm not reaaddddddyyyyy!" Bowser screamed, as he slid down. Suddenly, a curve in the waterslide came. Bowser closed his eyes and prepared to barf; but suddenly, he felt himself stop. He opened one eye.

He was stuck in the waterslide! He was too big to advance any further. Water trickled under his back.

"Help! I'm drowning!" Bowser screamed. Suddenly, he felt something ram into his back.

"What the hell?" Meta Knight's voice came from behind Bowser. "Wha- Bowser, are you stuck?"

Bowser nodded. Suddenly, he felt another impact.

"Meta Knight, what in the world is going on?" It was Isaac's voice. He must've been stuck behind Meta Knight.

"Bowser's stuck." Meta Knight grumbled.

"It's so dark in here! I'm going to die! I'm going to die!" Bowser sobbed. Suddenly, he heard Lyn's voice.

"…This is just great. Bowser's stuck, isn't he? Ugh…"

Her voice was suddenly joined by Marth's.

"Oh, for the love of God! I knew this would happen! God dammit!"

"We're going to die! I'm to young to die!" Bowser yelled. "Meta Knight, you'll stay here and keep me away from the light, won't you?"

"Don't worry, Bowser, I sure will- hey wait a second! Screw this, I can teleport!" Meta Knight disappeared from behind Bowser and appeared in front of him. He slid down the waterslide.

"See you later, suckers!"

Isaac rammed into Bowser now. Suddenly, they heard Meta Knight's voice through the waterslide. They heard a humph, which sounded very much like Sonic's.

All of the sudden, they heard Ike's voice calling up to them.

"Are you guys all alright up there?"

"Babe, is that you?" Lyndis called.

"Yeah. Don't panic, you guys, we've figured out a way to get you out!"

"Wait. What does he mean?" Isaac sounded worried. Instantaneously, they heard footsteps coming up fast.

"Incoming!!!" Sonic yelled, running up the waterslide. He crashed into Bowser with such force that the large monster got unfastened from the narrow space of the waterslide. Bowser instantly began to slide down again, pushing Sonic down the slide as well.

"I see light!" Bowser yelled excitedly.

All five of the smashers flew out of the waterslide, but instead of landing in the pool below it, they soared over the pool. They all began to scream.

_Meanwhile_…

"Sir, I'm afraid I can't sell you any tacos if you don't have the money!"

"Money my buttocks! I'm the king of Dreamworld!"

King DeDeDe argued with a cashier, who had the Tacobell cap on his forehead.

"Sir, I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

"No, I'm going to have to ask _you_ to leave."

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me alright."

All at once, Sonic, Bowser, Isaac, Lyn and Marth flew through the windows of the Tacobell and crashed into the counter, knocking the cashier out. Tacos flew everywhere as Bowser's body flew into the display.

"Victory is mine!" bellowed King DeDeDe. He began to pick tacos up off the floor as the smashers groaned and collected themselves.

* * *

A bus pulled up. Kapp'n opened up the doors, and the smashers piled in. Master Hand was waiting for them.

"So guys, had fun?"

Master Hand scanned the smashers. Balloon Fighter was crying, as he was out of balloons; Sonic, Bowser, Isaac, Lyn, and Marth were bruised to the bone; Ganondorf had a black eye and a bloody nose; Captain Falcon had rotten tomatoes clinging to his body; and Meowth was missing entirely.

"I'm assuming we're not going back."

"Are you kidding? That was the best field trip ever!" King DeDeDe said, through a mouth of taco. Marth angrily swatted the tacos out of his hand.

"Nooooooooo! Why? WHY???" King DeDeDe sobbed. Kapp'n sighed and started the bus, leaving the water park behind.

* * *

Bustman: So, what'd you think? Sorry I'm so late, again. But please, REVIEW!!!! Anyone who reviews gets tacos!!!

King DeDeDe: No! My tacos!


	19. Knocking on Heaven's Door

Bustman: Okay, I have a very good explanation as to _why_ I am so late. See-

King K. Rool: No you don't.

Bustman: I was- wait, what did you just say?

King K. Rool: No, you don't. You're just extremely lazy and to indolent to get up from your couch, eating popcorn and watching _I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here_, to write a chapter.

Bustman: Ouch.

King K. Rool: Anyways, Bustray doesn't own nothing.

Bustman: Well, you're a fat lizard crocodile-like thingy!

King K. Rool: Not as good as my diss.

Bustman: You win this round. Anyways, I promise updates will be coming sooner from now on… I hope you enjoy this chapter, nevertheless. And RIP, Michael Jackson… you will be missed.

* * *

It was a particularly inactive day in Smash Mansion. Character artwork had been delayed due to a large car accident right outside the Smash Mansion. The road was closed off for the day, meaning no one could get in or out. Ergo, a press conference was also cancelled.

So the smashers had the day off. Link and Meta Knight were outside of the mansion swordfighting, while Bowser was in his shell napping on the lawn.

"En guarde!" Meta Knight yelled. The two swords clashed, and the two were locked into combat. Bowser gave out an annoyed snort as the sound of metal scraping against metal woke him.

"Keep it down!" he yelled to the two swordsmen. They didn't hear him, and kept fighting.

"I SAID, KEEP IT DOWN!" Bowser roared. Still no response. He groaned, got up, stumbled over, and lit Meta Knight's cape on fire.

"OH DEAR GOD, I'M ON FIRE!!!!" Meta Knight screamed. He ran around in circles, continuing to wail. This, unfortunately, set the lawn on fire as well. Bowser sighed, picked up the flaming puffball, and punted him into the pool.

"Dammit! I can't swim!" Meta Knight yelled, in the center of the pool. Coincidentally, as Meta Knight drowned, Toon Link was playing Marco Polo with Diddy Kong, Dixie Kong and Kirby.

"Marco!"

"Polo!"

"Polo!"

"Polo!" Kirby yelled, as he swam past Meta Knight. Toon Link swam toward the voice of Meta Knight, and ran into Meta Knight.

"Gotcha, Kirby! You're it!" Toon Link exclaimed, jumping on top of the puffball he had mistaken for Kirby. Meta Knight was pushed down under the water, and struggled to get back up to the top. He desperately sucked in a mouthful of water, unable to keep him mouth closed for any longer. His vision became funny, and he slowly sunk to the bottom of the pool, his attempts to climb back up becoming feebler and feebler.

* * *

Pit, meanwhile was sunbathing on the roof. The radio was playing softly, and he sung along to it.

"_You spin my head right round, right round, when you go down, when you go down down!_" Pit sang, quite painfully. Suddenly, he heard a commotion to his right. He looked up. Past the gates of the mansion, an ice cream truck had accidentally run into one of the cones, lost control, and spun into a tree. The ice cream man stumbled out, stunned, but unharmed, and went to go get help.

"Crashed ice cream truck!" Pit shouted. Everyone inside the mansion ran out towards the inactive truck. Pit was getting ready to take off when he heard someone splashing frantically in the pool. Pit turned around and saw Meta Knight being pushed under by Toon Link, whose eyes were still closed. Meta Knight began to sink to the bottom.

Pit began to sweat. He could easily swoop down into the water and save Meta Knight… but he may never have another fair chance at this amount of free ice cream again. Meta Knight's life or his ice cream?

"Are you crazy?" an angel appeared on Pit's right shoulder. "It's a life here at stake. Do you really want to let an innocent soul die so you can sit around eating ice cream?"

"Ice cream, kid." A devil appeared on Pit's left shoulder. "You know you want to. And besides, who cares about Meta Knight? He took the last chicken wing at dinner last Wednesday, remember? And besides, why do devils always have to appear on the left side?"

"Oh shut up, you're just jealous because you know angels are always right!"

"Are not!"

The two sides of Pit's conscious began to brawl on Pit's head.

"Be quiet up there!" Pit yelled. "I'm trying to think!"

"Sorry, boss."

Pit sighed. He knew he had to do the right thing. So he flew away to get ice cream, and let Meta Knight continue to drown.

* * *

Meta Knight was sitting on a bench in the clouds, reading US magazine.

"Are you kidding me? Angelina Jolie SO rocked that dress harder than Jada Pinkett Smith!" Meta Knight snorted.

"Totally agree, dude." A tall, frail man in a tuxedo sat down next to Meta Knight. He was wearing sunglasses that covered most of his face, and a black hair that came down past his shoulders. Meta Knight gasped.

"Michael Jackson!?"

"Yeah, that's right. I had a cardiac arrest a couple of hours ago, and they couldn't revive me… so here I am."

"Oh. That sucks. I got pushed underwater by a little green-clad bastard. I can't swim, see."

The pop legend shook his head. "Sometimes, we pass away before we're ready. That's why we're both here."

"Where are we, anyways?"

"I don't know. Somewhere where time doesn't matter, I guess, because that issue of US came out 4 days from today."

"Oh yeah. Hey, this tribute to you is pretty cool."

"Never mind the tribute. I think you need to forgive this little green bastard you speak of."

Meta Knight looked up. "Why? He killed me."

"But if you don't forgive him, he will have to carry the burden around with him for the rest of his life that he killed someone, and is not forgiven for it."

"Let him."

"Forgive and forget, Meta Knight. That's what I always say. Forgive and forget."

Meta Knight sighed. "Well, you know what? Now I won't be able to watch the series finale of _The Bachelorette_. I can't forgive him for that. Hell, I wouldn't forgive ANYONE for that."

"But do you really want a poor innocent soul to be burdened for the rest of eternity?" Michael Jackson asked.

"I think what Michael is trying to say…" Bustman said, appearing on a bench across from Michael Jackson and Meta Knight. "Is that in order for life to go on peacefully, there must be forgiveness."

"Fine." Meta Knight sighed. "If I forgive him, can I have a signed copy of _Thriller_?"

"Deal."

"Wait a second." Meta Knight looked at Bustman. "Did you die too?"

"Nah, I'm just the writer. I can appear anywhere I want."

Michael Jackson handed the signed album to Meta Knight. "Now, you remember what I said."

"Don't worry, I will," Meta Knight said. Suddenly, he began to fade away. "Wha-what's happening?"

"You're returning to Earth." Bustman said. "I just wrote it into the plot that Minun and Plusle save you, and Bowser revives you."

"Minun and Plusle? Who- oh yeah, they're part of the story too."

"Yeah. You just forgot about them because I barely ever use them in the plot." Bustman nodded. "_Au Revoir_, Meta Knight."

* * *

"Live! LIVE!!!" Meta Knight regained conscious to find that Bowser was repeatedly pounding on his chest, getting rid of all the unwelcome water in his system. Meta Knight coughed, and then spit out some of the pool water.

"Meta Knight!!! You're alive!!!" Bowser hugged the puffball.

"Hey, where'd you get that Michael Jackson album?" Link asked, noticing the signed edition of _Thriller._

"What Michael Jackson album?" Meta Knight swiftly hid his prized possession in a pocket on the inside of his cape. Link raised an eyebrow, then shrugged.

"You should thank Minun & Plusle. They saved you from the pool." Luigi remarked. Meta Knight nodded his thanks to the two soaked pokemon, who gave the thumbs up… with their non-opposable thumbs. Weird.

"Meta Knight! Thank God!" Master Hand rushed out onto the lawn. "Pit told me you had drowned!"

Pit came out onto the lawn, holding a chocolate cone. "Hey, glad to see you're still alive, buddy. I would've got you an ice cream, but I saw you drowning from the roof, and I assumed that you would be dead by the time I was back."

"Wait… you saw me drowning, and you didn't save me?"

"…Bye." Pit quickly ran back into the mansion, still gripping his ice cream cone.

"Meta Knight, I'm really sorry!" Toon Link looked guilty. "I thought you were Kirby, and would be able to swim back up!"

"It's all good, kid." Meta Knight said. "Here, I have something for you." He pulled back out the Michael Jackson album. "It's _Thriller_, signed by the late Michael Jackson."

"Wow, thanks!" Toon Link eagerly grabbed the album. Meta Knight looked up. He saw Michael Jackson on the roof of the mansion. The legend winked, and then disappeared.

"Wait…" Toon Link said, puzzled. "What do you mean late?"

"Everybody! Michael Jackson is dead!" Isaac ran out onto the lawn, waving around his iPhone. "TMZ said so, so it must be true!"

Toon Link threw a puzzled glance at Meta Knight, who quickly began to whistle and walk away.

* * *

Bustman: Ah, so that's another chapter concluded. Be sure to review and-

King K. Rool: Is that seriously _all _ you're going to write?

Bustman: Hey, that's a good 7 pages on Microsoft Word!

King K. Rool: Come on, man.

Bustman: Hey, if you want to keep that nice, big juicy role you have in the next chapter, I would recommend you shut it.

King K. Rool: I'll be good.

Bustman: So that was another chapter from another character's point of view! You wanted it and I gave it to you. Please review, and I promise the next chapter will come sooner… and will probably be longer... you can probably expect it around the end of June. Au Revoir!


	20. Marth's Point of View: Part 1

Bustman: Hiya! I know this is a bit later than I promised...

King DeDeDe: Try three weeks.

Bustman: ...but the important thing is that I have a new one. This one is from Marth's point of review, and it will follow up into the next three chapters.

King DeDeDe: As always, review...

Bustman: Enjoy the chapter...

King DeDeDe & Bustman: And have a _wonderful_ day!

* * *

Days passed at the mansion, and life went on regularly, even though there was triple the amount of Michael Jackson music in the mansion. Character sketches were drawn, and there was three press conferences a week. The game was slowly coming into place; the brawl modes were mapped out, as was most of the single player challenges. However, nearly no progress had been made on the game's story mode. Master Hand decided there was only one way to make any progress…

"I can't believe Master Hand is making us do all of the work on this story mode!" Marth complained, throwing a note pad down on his bed. Link shot a sympathetic glance at him, a phone up to his ear. Marth had been assigned a role as screenwriter, while Link had been given the slightly less stress-inducing role as executive producer. Link suddenly spoke.

"Yes, hello, is this Alec Baldwin's secretary? Yes, this is Link, an executive producer for the new story mode of- what's that? No, I don't have a last name… but we were really hoping that Alec could make a cameo in- how much pay? We're willing to offer him $40,000 dollars… no, filming starts in January... alright, fine, $45,000 dollars… I'm sorry, but over $100,000 is simply out of the question… this is a freaking video game we're talking about, and- hello?"

Link sighed and hung up. "Alec Baldwin is a no-go." Marth threw him a puzzled look.

"Why do we want Alec Baldwin again?"

"Oh, that's right, Master Hand wanted me to tell you that he wanted you to work in a couple of cameos into that screenplay…" Link said, looking through a telephone book. Marth sighed dramatically.

"Why was I assigned to write this stupid screenplay? I dropped out of school in high school, dammit!"

"Hey, you're not alone." Link said, pointing at a number and dialing it in on his phone nonchalantly. Marth snorted.

"Oh yeah, Waluigi and Pit are a big help…"

"You've got Zelda and Lyndis as well," Link said, holding his phone up to his ear once more.

"Yeah, well, we're the only ones really doing the work." Marth muttered. "Anyways, you got off easy. Executive producer… all you need to do is make a couple of calls…"

"Hello, is this Josh Brolin's manager? Yes, I'm sure you are familiar with the Super Smash Bros. franchise, and… hello? Hello?" Link hung up, looking disgruntled. Marth shot a wary look at him.

"Have you gotten _anyone_ yet?"

"Well, I've got a maybe from Tina Fey… nice woman, I actually got to speak personally with her…"

Marth narrowed his eyes, and Link sighed.

"Fine, I've got no one. You have no idea how difficult it is. Wait a second, I've got a call coming in…" Link picked up his phone again. "Hello? Oh, yes, hi! So the location, are we all good on… alright, that's a bit pricy, but I'm sure it won't be to hard… are you sure we can't beat that price down? Alright, I'll have a word with him… thanks." Link hung up and headed toward the door.

"Where are you going?" Marth asked. Link threw a sideways glance at him.

"Oh, just going up to talk with Master Hand… we got the desert region of the national park in Altea, but it's going to cost a bit more than we hoped… I'll be right back."

Link left, leaving Marth alone. He decided to go downstairs, see how progress was going with everyone else.

However, he was met with a surprise when he entered the ground floor of the mansion. Everyone was huddling around a billboard, talking excitedly. Marth pushed his way through the crowd to see what the fuss was about. A paper on the billboard read:

**Thanksgiving Bash**

**22 W. Rockwood St.**

** 7:00pm-12:00am**

** Join us for our thanksgiving feast, with drinks**

** and karaoke afterwards! You are permitted to **

** bring two guests from your own world (if you **

** wish to do so). Guaranteed fun!**

** And socks!**

** Crazy, get off the keyboard.**

** I don't play the piano.**

** That's not what I meant- Crazy don't press prin**

Marth sighed. Karaoke? He'd have to get really drunk before he did _that._ Marth scanned the notice board, and a bright gold directive caught his eye, right above the Thanksgiving notification. Wario, Dixie Kong and Samurai Goroh were all reading it. Marth studied it.

** Thanksgiving Party!**

**87 E. Bateman St.**

****** 4:30-6:30**

****** Large party antecedent to the Thanksgiving Bash. **

****** There will be music and snacks. Hosted by your **

****** friend Crazy Hand. Oh, and if you're reading this,**

****** Rick, you still owe me $20 dollars. Be there or face**

****** the wrath of my army of bunny rabbits!**

"Oh goodie! Bunnies!" Dixie Kong squealed. Diddy Kong let out a hefty sigh.

"They're a figment of Crazy Hand's imagination, Dixie."

"Oh. Will there still be tacks?"

"_Snacks._"

"Damn contacts."

"Marth!"

Marth turned around as Zelda ran up to him. Marth suddenly felt very hot.

"Zelda?"

"I was just wondering if you had drawn a character sketch for the Crawlingcreepers yet."

Damn it. He had forgotten to do that. He'd probably look like an idiot now.

"Er- haven't gotten around to it yet."

"Good." Zelda sounded relieved. Marth arched an eyebrow. "Master Hand got into a big copyright argument, supposedly they were to similar to some villains for sony. So Master Hand decided to terminate the character."

"Oh," Marth tried to think of some dry, witty remark to this, but the wheels in his head had stopped turning. "Well... that's good."

"Yeah. Anyways, we'll have to brainstorm something new."

"Can we meet tonight?" Marth tried not to sound too hopeful. "Y'know, to brainstorm for the-" His voice faltered as Zelda shook her head.

"Sorry, Marth, I can't. Me and Link are going to a movie."

"What movie?" Marth asked, blurting it out without meaning to.

"District 19- or something like that. Maybe tomorrow."

"Okay," Marth watched her walk away. _Smooth, _he thought to himself. Then he shook his head, as if to get rid of a pesky mosquito. What was he doing? She was his best friend's girlfriend, for heaven's sake.

"Romantic problems?"

Marth spun around. Shadow leaned against the wall, somehow managing to smirk at him while he bit into an apple. Marth was suddenly very glad all of the smashers who had been reading the notice had cleared away.

"No," he said crossly.

"Ah, come on, kid, I saw you staring at her with those puppy dog eyes." Shadow widened his eyes. "'Can we meet tonight?'" he imitated Marth in a nasty high pitch. Marth began to walk away.

"Falling for your best friend's girl? Happens all the time. Classic case of wanting what you don't have. Ruins 13% of friendships, you know."

"I'm not going to make a move on her or anything," Marth snapped.

"Do you mind?" Waluigi peered over 1,000 ways to torture green capped heroes from a chair nearby.

"That's what they all say," Shadow sneered, ignoring Waluigi. "In the end, desire wins out over better judgement."

Marth glared at the black hedgehog, and then turned heel and walked away.

"Concupiscence will always win, Marth! Always!"

* * *

Marth approached the door for his room and reached for the key. He hesitated. He could hear Link's voice inside, and Link was the last person he wanted to see right now.

"Oi, Marth!"

Marth turned to see Ike walking toward him, gripping Ray's leash as the small dog tried to break free of his collar and bound toward Marth.

"Here, let me get that for you." Ike brought his own key out of his pocket and opened the door.

Marth glumly entered the room. Link mouthed '_hey_' to his two roommates, and then sighed audibly into the cellphone up to his ear.

"That's quite alright, Mrs. Streep, we understand. Thank you for your time. Okay now, bye-bye." Link put his cellphone down and pressed his palms against his temples.

"Ugh. That's the 14th rejection I've gotten today." He collapsed onto his bed, and Ray bounded ont Link's bed next to him as Ike shot his friend a sympathetic glance.

"I might have to work late... I'll have to cancel my date with Zelda... but I already got the damn tickets..."

Marth considered offering to take Zelda, but decided against it. Too awkward. Ike clamped a hand on Link's shoulder.

"It's okay, dude. I could take her, or maybe she could go with one of her friends..."

Before Marth was fully aware of what he was doing, he had stormed out of the room and slammed the door. He could hear Link ask "What's up with him?" and he could picture Ike shrugging.

_I could've taken her. Of course Ike had to beat me to it._ Marth though bitterly, walking away from the room. Not paying attention to his whereabouts, he bumped into Samus. He sighed, expecting a scolding, but one didn't come.

"Guess what? Wolf asked me out!" Samus said exuberantly.

"Big whoop." Marth grumbled. As he walked away, he heard Samus grumbled something like 'You don't have to be an asshole about it.' before she stormed away in the other direction.

Maybe she was right. Maybe he was being an asshole. But right now, he didn't particularly care. Everyone deserved a good mope every once in a while.

* * *

It turned out Link ended up taking out Zelda after successfully signing on Frances McDormand. Marth spent the night in the lounge of the mansion, still fuming.

"Stupid Link. Stupid Ike. Stupid District-whatever." Marth growled quietly.

Marth bit his lip. He listened for the small, comforting noises in the mansion- the thermostat ticking on and off, Mario humming while doing his laundry, the occasional car driving past. He heard one come to a stop, and voices ring out from outside.

"...and the visual effects were great, did you see that explosion near the middle? I've never heard of the director, but he did a pretty good job..."

Marth cursed under his breath. He had forgotten that Link and Zelda were returning from the movie. They would have to pass directly past the couch he was sleeping on. He slipped his head under the blanket as the front door opened, laying flat on his back and hoping that they would just think it was a stray blanket lying across the couch.

Link continued to talk. "Interesting format too, almost like a documentary, and-"

Marth peeked out from his hiding spot. Link and Zelda were walking toward the couch, still talking Link turned his head Marth's direction- Marth quickly ducked back under his blanket, but their eyes had connected for a brief moment. Link's started talking again.

"Come on, Zelda, I'll walk you to your room.

"Okay," Zelda sounded surprised by his brisk tone. He heard the two ascending the stairs, and then they were out of earshot. Marth took his head out of the covers. He cursed himself for being so stupid as to peek out. What had he been thinking?

He heard footsteps come down from the stairs. _Probably Shadow, back to taunt me._ He was surprised to see Link's stocky figure appear at the doorway. He walked over to Marth and sat down in a plush chair opposite him.

"Hey," Marth said sullenly. Link didn't respond, instead giving him a good, hard stare. He finally spoke.

"What's up, man?"

"Nothing." Marth retorted.

"Marching out on your friends and sleeping on the couch doesn't sound like nothing."

"This comes from a guy who saves the world every other day."

Link gave a quiet chuckle. "I won't pry. But please come back to the room. Ike is crying his eyes out. If it it goes much longer, it might reach flood level."

Marth laughed out loud. "Really?"

"Nah, he doesn't care. He fell asleep ages ago. But _I _miss you, man."

Marth snorted. Link got up.

"Come on, man. Get up. I'm auctioning your bed if you're not there in five minutes."

Marth sighed, got up and stretched. "Fine, if it makes you happy."

Link grinned. "Atta boy. Now come on- we've got a tournament tomorrow.


	21. Marth's Point of View: Part 2

Bustman: Hello, and thank you for all of your generous reviews! We are now approaching the 100 review mark!!! And I'll be honest- I never thought that the story would come this far. I can't express my gratitude to all of you guys.

Link: Um, Bustman, its not the reviews that count. It's all of the people that enjoyed your story.

Bustman: WHAT!?!?!?! LIES!!!! THIS IS !!!! HOW DARE YOU SPOIL THIS PERFECT MOMENT!!!!

Link: (runs away screaming)

Bustman: That's right, you'd better run. I don't own anything. Oh, and one more thing- I have a new story out, **Brawler's Island**. It's a story of suspense and adventure, so if you're interested, check it out. Anyways, please review- It'd be fantastic if we could hit that 100th review before the next chapter!!!

* * *

"Welcome to the second smasher tournament! Congratulations to our last champion, Waluigi!"

Waluigi ran up and shoved Master Hand away. "Thank you! Thank you! I couldn't have done it without my girlfriend- er…"

"You don't have a girlfriend!" Wario shouted.

"Says who?" Waluigi went red.

"Says your face! Ness shouted. He and Lucas high fived.

"Um… yes, and I-"

"Take a hike!"

"Fine, I give up." Waluigi threw the microphone to the floor and walked away.

"Er- yes, moving along," Master Hand fitted the microphone back into its stand. "Congrats as well to our runner up, Peach, even if she did blackmail her way into 2nd…"

Peach blew kisses. "Thank you, you're too kind!"

"…Well, anyways, she is disqualified from every other tournament, for eternity. Now, we have rounded up 32 of you at random. You will, again, fight your hardest for the grand prize. Stock will be two and all items will be supplied for the first round. Now, let's have up…" the screen showed two faces. "Marth and Zelda!"

Marth gaped at the screen. That couldn't be right, no way. He couldn't fight Zelda! How was he supposed to harm _her_, whether the pain was real or not?

He was brought back to his senses by a slap on the back by Link.

"Get on up there, man! I wouldn't go easy on her- she certainly won't on you!"

Marth gave a weak nod. He walked up to the teleporting machines, where Zelda was already waiting. She gave him an encouraging smile before they walked in to their machines.

They appeared on Corneria. Marth sized up the stage- if he needed to get to safe ground, he could always drop down to the lower back of the plane, or the jets at the front. He was faster than Zelda, he'd be able to beat her there if there was immediate danger.

Marth was so preoccupied with his thoughts that he failed to notice the start of the competition. He was taken aback as a large ball of fire hit him in the chest and knocked the wind out of him. He scrambled back up to his feet. Great. The battle hadn't gone 10 seconds and he'd already made a fool of himself.

He saw another ball of fire speed toward him, but Marth rolled backwards and avoided it. He spotted a capsule at his feet; he quickly scooped it up and threw it at Zelda, but she easily blocked it. However, the item inside was a Deku Nut, which hit her on the head. She took a step back backwards and shook her head, looking very dizzy. Marth ran at Zelda, spotting his chance immediately. He began to charge up a smash attack.

Then his eyes met Zelda's her pupils wide and her eyes pleading. He couldn't attack her. He let the sword drop to his side.

The next thing he knew, Zelda's hand shot toward his chest. Powerful energy shot through his body, and he was blown backwards. He landed near the end of the plane, and quickly got up to his feet. His stupidity astounded him. How could he have fallen for the pity trick? He gritted his teeth. The time to be a gentleman was over.

Marth jumped up and flew at Zelda. She looked surprised that Marth had recovered so quickly, and had no time to defend herself as Marth slashed her with his sword. She was thrown backwards, but landed on her feet. She used Nayru's Love, but Marth jumped back, and warily watched as the blue crystal ebbed away. As soon as it has dissolved, Marth hit Zelda with a smash attack. Zelda took the blow silently, keeping her ground. Marth landed a sword combo on her before she took action.

She rolled behind Marth while he charged a smash attack and hit him with a smash attack of her own. Marth flew up into the air, and before he hit the ground Din's Fire flew out of her palm and hit him further up. This occurred twice more before Marth had the sense to shield himself. He dodged another ball of fire and hit Zelda in the chest with his sword. She flew onto the tack of the plane. Marth landed another sword combo on her, and she was blown back off of the plane. Marth spotted a pitfall at his feet, and, spotting his chance, picked it up. As Zelda jumped back toward the plane, Marth aimed and threw it. It hit Zelda in the stomach, and she was spiked down out of boundaries.

Marth performed a taunt for the camera while remaining wary of Zelda, who had just lowered down from her recovery platform. Marth jumped back up over the fin of the plane. Zelda met him with a kick to the stomach. Marth slashed forward, but white magical energy had formed around Zelda. Within seconds, blue bandages had wrapped around her body and face. She was now Shiek.

Zelda's other form landed a few punches on Marth and then jumped out of the way as Marth tried to uppercut her. She flew a few needles at him, but they bounced harmlessly off his sword. Marth then ran forwards and lunged at her, but she was too quick. She jumped over onto the other side of him and jabbed at Marth with two fingers. He flew off the front of the stage, but then determinedly gripped on to the nose of the plane. He wasn't going down that easily.

He sidestepped as Shiek ran toward him, and delivered a blow onto her back. As she gasped for air, he grabbed her and kicked his opponent off the plane. She grasped her chain and used it as a tether recovery. She jumped up in front of Marth and whipped him with her new weapon. Marth flew backwards, but Shiek lassoed the chain around his leg and tossed him in the other direction, off of the stage. Marth tried to recover, but Shiek whipped him on the nose with the weapon again. Too stunned to jump, he helplessly fell out of boundaries.

Marth jumped down from his recovery platform. Zelda had taken her original form again, and was now taunting for the camera. Marth took action immediately and dashed forwards, shouldering her. She slid backwards, a small smile forming on her face. Marth began to charge up a smash attack, but he felt a small item land in his palm. He looked down and grinned at the B-Bomb. He threw it, but she was prepared. She grabbed the bomb in mid-air and quickly tossed it back. Marth was hit by the bomb, but nothing happened. It bounced off of him and lay at his feet. He sighed in relief- it must be dysfunctional.

To his surprise, the item then exploded and he was caught in the vortex. He was then thrown backwards. Marth wiped his brow. He still had the advantage- he had a good 25% less damage. He charged at Zelda and slashed at her with his sword. She flew backwards and hit the ground hard. Suddenly, a poké ball landed at her feet. Marth ran for it, but Zelda picked herself up and grabbed it before he could reach the small red and white ball. She threw it at him, and a Kyogre sprung out.

Marth's thoughts? _I'm so screwed._

He was blown off his feet by a blast of water. He tried to plant his feet onto the ground, but the jet of water was too strong. He slid nearer and nearer to the back of the plane.

Through all of the water, a smash ball caught his eye. It floated toward Zelda, and she threw a punch at it.

Marth began to panic. He was only two yards away from the edge of the plane. He couldn't let Zelda get the smash ball. If Kyogre didn't rid him of his last life, Zelda's final smash undoubtedly would. He was only a yard away from the edge now. Two feet…

Summoning all of his strength into his legs, he jumped forwards for his life. He bounced off of Kyogre's back, and slashed at the smash ball. He felt red energy flow into him. He grinned, and then attacked the princess with his final smash. Her health depleted, and she flew off the screen, a look of pure bewilderment on her face.

**GAME!**

The two warped back at the clearing outside of the mansion. His smashers cheered for him, and Zelda, smiling, held out her hand for a handshake. The match had gone perfectly.

Marth wasn't sure what made him do what he did next. Maybe it was the adrenaline pumping through his body from the battle. Maybe it was the overwhelming joy he felt for not making a fool out of himself in front of Zelda. Maybe it was just plain stupidity.

Marth performed his favorite taunt; two victory slashes forward. Before he knew what happened, Zelda had crumpled to the floor, and his blade was covered in blood. The audience gasped. Horrified, Marth look down at Zelda. A deep gash was pouring blood from Zelda's shoulder. Marth distantly heard Link's bellow, and his friend ran up to Zelda. Marth was frozen, unable to do anything. Zelda whimpered as Link checked over her shoulder

"It's going to be fine, Dr. Mario will fix it right up, it's okay…"

Dr. Mario walked up to Link and gently touched his shoulder. "I'll take care of her." He murmured. Link nodded, and slowly turned around, facing Marth. Marth was taken aback. He had never seen such rage flash in Link's crystal blue eyes, never such anger etched onto his face. He snarled.

"_You_."

Before Marth knew what hit him, Link was on top of him, punching him with quick, powerful blows. Marth didn't fight back, he knew he deserved it, he had to be the most horrible person in the world…

Ike pulled Link off of Marth, and was holding him in a tight grip. Link writhed, trying to break free of Ike's strong arms. There was silence from the smashers as Marth got up. He looked at Link with sad, weary eyes, meeting his murderous gaze unflinchingly.

"I'm sorry," he murmured to Link. He turned to Zelda. "I'm so sorry."

And then, with his head bowed, he walked away.


	22. Marth's Point of View: Part 3

Bustman: Hiya! I come bearing great news!

Marth: I could use some…

Bustman: Fine then! We have reached the 100-review mark!

(Fireworks, everyone dances, Captain Falcon gets very drunk and passes out)

Bustman: Yes, yes, thank you, thank you. I literally couldn't have done it without my readers! Or else there would be no one to review my story! So thanks for your support, guys!

Now, Zelda was supposed to do the disclaimer today, but due to recent events she had to drop out… (throws dirty look at Marth)

Marth: Hey, you were the one who made me do it! You're the writer!

Bustman: Sure I am. Always trying to weasel your way out of these awkward situations, aren't you, Marth?

Marth: (discontent grumbling)

Bustman: I guess I'll just do the disclaimer myself. I do not own anything. And remember, just because we have reached the 100-review mark DOES NOT MEAN YOU SHOULD STOP REVIEWING!!!!!!!!! Although if you're very busy and you simply don't have the time to review, I can find it in my heart to forgive you in advance. Enjoy the chapter!

* * *

_**Mishap At The Mansion**_

_**Yesterday was a dark day for the Super Smash Brothers. In a tournament concealed from the public eye, veteran smasher Marth, from Fire Emblem, failed to remember the difference from violence in pain simulators and violence in the real world. Coming fresh off of a victory, Marth stabbed his opponent, Zelda from the popular Legend of Zelda series, in the shoulder, assumedly overexcited by the thought of victory and blowing off steam. As soon as Zelda fell to the floor, longtime boyfriend Link, also from the Legend of Zelda series, ran to her side to make sure she was alright. As soon as he was assured of her well being, he turned to Marth (who, coincidentally, he is also rooming with) and attacked him until pulled back by a bystander. As soon as he was free, Marth stormed away into the mansion.**_

_**"Oh, yes, I'm definitely surprised by his actions. He and Zelda seemed to get along so well," Shadow, a new smasher, stated. "Although he always has been quick to anger, a bit on the violent side, yes."**_

_**The actions were definitely not good for Marth's publicity. Within an hour of the incident, approximately 3600 fans had terminated membership with his fan base website. As of today, almost half of his fans have left the website. The next Fire Emblem game has been reportedly delayed to give the uproar time to blow over.**_

_**Will Marth be dismissed from the fourth Super Smash Bros. game? Speculation had occurred that Ike came into the third game for the public to become accustomed to him, and would replace Marth as the Fire Emblem representative in future games. A recent poll showed that 51.3% of Super Smash Bros. players preferred Ike over Marth, number that will surely increase given the public's anger over Marth's actions. Master Hand denied comment as to whether or not Marth would remain in the fourth game. However, his brother Crazy Hand was heard saying:**_

_**"Oh, yes, he should definitely leave. Danger to us all, that one is. Now where's my $50 bucks.**_

_**Legend of Zelda fans have also gone into a frenzy. After hearing about the incident, a group of roughly 2,000 Legend of Zelda fans gathered outside of the mansion, holding an Anti-Marth rally and threatening to boycott the fourth game if Marth was in it.**_

_**"Marth's behavior is undefendable, and such actions should be punished severely. We hope that Master Hand comes to his senses and excludes Marth from this game, and re-releases the second and third games free of that blue haired freak," said Margery, a 24 year old Legend of Zelda fan. Jacob, a 20-year old fan, said, "That Marth should be gotten rid of, definitely. Zelda's hot, and if that no good scoundrel messed up Zelda's looks, I'll kill him personally with the Master Sword!" The teenager than proceeded to take out a plastic sword and stab the air repeatedly, making a series of sound effects.**_

_**Maybe the most respectable course of action for Marth to follow is step down from the fourth game right now, as it isn't to far into development to cut a character. The public obviously wants Marth gone, and even though this is an unbiased newspaper, we feel that it would be for the best if the game were rid of Marth.**_

_**"Oh yes, Marth should definitely go." Shadow declared. "I think I speak for all my fellow smashers when I say: screw him." **_*

Marth put the paper down and rubbed his eyes. He had spent the last 24 hours in his room. He refused to come down for meals. Link wasn't speaking to him, and refused to answer when Marth asked how Zelda was doing. Ike was a bit more sympathetic- he had brought him up his meals, and had attempted to hide the headline of the newspaper from Marth by cutting out the article and tossing it. However, Marth had stolen the paper outside Meta Knight and Bowser's room.

Marth absentmindedly stroked Ray. He heard a knock on the door, but he didn't answer. "Marth, please let us in! I don't have my key!" Ike's voice came from the other side of the wall. Marth didn't get up, even though Ray ran to the door and scratched the frame, whimpering.

"Marth, if you don't open this door, we're going to have to break it open!"

Marth stared at the door dully. He heard Ike sigh from the other side.

"Fine. Here goes."

There was a loud _bang_, and the door swung open. Ike walked in, followed by Luigi, K.K. Slider, Isaac, Meta Knight and, most surprisingly, Mario walk in after him.

"What are you guys doing her?" Marth asked weakly.

"We're your pep crew." Meta Knight said, plopping down on the bed opposite Marth. Ike drew up a chair and sat down as well.

"We're here to talk," Ike said. "Buddy, you've got to come out of this slump."

"Why should I?" Marth shot back childishly. Luigi put a hand on Marth's shoulder.

"Because we miss you. We're your friends, Marth. We'll stand by you whatever you do, no matter how foolish your actions may be."

"I stabbed Zelda." Marth was getting angry. "That's unforgivable in my book." Why couldn't they understand what a monster he was?

"We know it was an accident." Mario said. "And accidents happen."

"That's right." Isaac began. "And-"

"In fact, something similar happened to me once," Mario cut off Isaac. "I was introducing myself to the princess of the Rosemary Kingdom when I tripped over a chair and fell on top of her. Knocked her out cold, I did. Mind you, this was when I was a lot heavier. She had a small concussion. Boy the citizens were angry. Never forgave me if I remember correctly."

"You aren't making him feel any better." Isaac snapped. Mario shrugged.

"Hey, just letting him know I understand his situation."

"Everyone hates me, and I deserve it." Marth growled.

"Look, everyone will forget about it eventually. Things will be normal again soon," Meta Knight promised. Marth shook his head.

"I'm going to be laid off. Read the paper." Marth tossed the paper at the group. Isaac skimmed it, and then started laughing.

"There's nothing funny about it." Marth snapped.

"Dude, there weren't 2,000 Legend of Zelda fans rallying against you. About 200, maybe. Probably less.

Marth arched an eyebrow. "What?"

"Everyone knows you and Link are best friends. You've become popular with The Legend of Zelda fans." K.K. elaborated. "And they wouldn't want to rid Link of his best friend."

"In fact, Link asked the fans who were rallying to clear off." Ike added. Marth looked surprised.

"Link? But- but he's not speaking to me!"

"He may be angry with you, but he doesn't want you gone. I'm sure he knows it was an accident as well." Isaac said.

"And is that thing about my fan base true?" Marth asked hopefully. No one responded, and Luigi bit his lip. Marth sighed.

"I guess it is, then."

"Look, dude, there are a lot of people angry. But things aren't going to change if you mope in your room. And if you continue like this, you are _definitely _going to get laid off. You've got to take action."

"What should I do?" Marth asked. Ike gave him a small smile.

"Why don't you start by apologizing to Zelda?"

* * *

"What do you think _you're_ doing here?"

Marth met Link's furious gaze evenly. "I came to apologize to Zelda."

Link dropped his gaze unevenly. "Asking for forgiveness for something that's unforgivable is pointless."

"I know," Marth said quietly. "What I did was unforgivable, and I don't know what made me do it. But I am sorry. And I want Zelda to know that."

Link still didn't look up. "You can't come in," he growled quietly. He stood protectively in front of the main entrance.

"Link," said a weak voice from inside. "Let Marth in."

Link turned around. "Zelda, honey-"

"Let Marth in," the voice said, a bit firmer. Link spun around, shot a dirty look at Marth, and stepped aside. Sending an apologetic glance at Link, Marth walked in.

Zelda was sitting up in her bed, looking pale but giving a small smile to Marth. A bandage was wrapped around her shoulder, and her hair was messy and unkempt. Marth noticed that, despite this, she still looked beautiful.

"Hey," Zelda said weakly. She noticed Marth staring hesitantly at a chair by her bedside. "Don't be silly, take a seat."

Marth drew up the chair. "Zelda, I'm so sorry, I had no idea what I was thinking, I didn't mean to hit you-"

"Marth, it's fine, it's fine," Zelda smiled. "You don't need to worry about it."

Marth studied her. "Aren't you angry about it? At all?"

Zelda shrugged. "It's too bad what happened did. But accidents do happen. Sometimes all you can do is forgive and forget." She studied the newspaper by her bedside. "In fact, I'm the one who should be sorry."

Marth shook his head. "Zelda, that's absurd."

"You don't deserve all of this," she pointed at the headline. "I should've played off the stab. I could've attacked you back, said we were confused and thought we were still in the pain simulator. Or I could've made it seem like I'd provoked you." She smiled, and then clutched her shoulder like Marth had just stabbed her. "You're mother's still a bitch!" she shrieked in a high voice. Dr. Mario peeked out from his office and gave Zelda a disapproving look. Marth allowed himself to chuckle.

"How's your shoulder?"

Zelda shrugged. "Hurt for the first few hours, but the magic in my blood healed it quickly. In fact, the only reason I'm still in the hospital wing is because Dr. Mario won't let me go for precautionary purposes."

"Wrap it up in there!" Dr. Mario's voice emitted from his office. Marth glanced at the clock and nodded his head.

"Well, again, Zelda, I'm really sorry…"

"I don't want to hear it." Zelda shook her head. Dr. Mario hurried in.

"Time to change your bandage, Zelda. Out you go Marth. Scoot."

Zelda kissed Marth on the cheek. "Be brave. People are going to be angry, but don't let them get to you." She murmured. Blushing, Marth nodded. He got up to leave.

"Oh, Marth, one more thing." Marth turned back to the princess. "If the fire you, I'm quitting. Contract or no contract." She winked. Marth smiled, and left the room, his face still beet red.

* * *

Marth walked into the cafeteria with Ike. Within seconds, the room went silent. All eyes were on him.

"Don't worry, it's me... I got a haircut." Ike whispered. Marth chuckled.

"What are you so happy about?" Peach asked coldly, shouldering past Marth and grabbing a tray. Marth stopped chuckling and went silent.

"Come on, let's get food." Ike pulled Marth away from Peach. They picked up trays and walked over to the food. "Look, Jell-O for dessert, your favorite." Ike pointed out brightly.

"You requested it, didn't you?" Marth asked wearily. Ike shrugged.

"Does it matter?"

"Ooh, that Jell-O looks good. I might grab a couple bowls… or more." Sonic, who was in front of Ike and Marth, swept all of the Jell-O onto his tray. He passed by Ike and Marth, and then said loudly, "Ike, did you not get one? Here!" Sonic placed a bowl on Ike's tray, and then walked away, ignoring Marth.

"Here, you have mine," Ike tried to give the Jell-O to Marth, but he pushed it way.

"I'm not hungry," he said quietly. "Let's just find a seat."

As the two walked over to the tables, all of the smashers turned and gave Marth dirty looks, clamping their hands onto the back of empty chairs.

"Sorry, only decent people at this table." Pit sneered as Marth and Ike tried to approach their table. Marth shot a desperate look at Bowser, who was sitting next to Pit, but the large Koppa just turned away.

Marth turned around walk away, only to come face-to-face with Link.

"Link…" Marth pleaded.

Link averted his gaze from Marth. "Don't be so pathetic," the swordsman growled, taking a seat at Pit's table. Marth was stung.

"Ike, Marth, over here!"

Isaac was waving at them from a table near the back. Luigi, Mario, Kirby and K.K. were sitting with him. Ike looked relieved.

"You can't let them get to you. They'll get over it." Isaac said as they sat down.

"You could always stage getting laid off and then disguise yourself as a new smasher." Mario bit into a French fry. Luigi gave him a disapproving look.

"That is, if I don't actually get laid off."

"Don't think like that." K.K. said. "They won't, Master Hand knows it was just an accident."

Marth just looked sadly down at his tray. The seven ate in silence for the rest of the meal. As Marth got up to put his tray away, he heard a quiet voice behind him say "Marth?"

Bowser Jr. was looking up at the tall swordsman, looking nervous. "Um, Master Hand wanted to see you," the Koopa stuttered.

_Oh God, this is it. He's going to dismiss me._ Marth thought feverishly.

"Alright, thanks," Marth muttered. He waved goodbye to his friends glumly, and headed toward the stairs. He paused.

What if he just ran? He could spare himself the humiliation of getting fired, the sadness of having to say goodbye to his friends… he could hitchhike back to Altea, where he was welcome no matter what he did.

_Be brave._ Zelda's word struck him like a bolt of lightning. He couldn't run away from his problems. Not like that. He would regret it for the rest of his life. He sighed, and then walked up two flights of steps to the third floor. He walked down the hallway, and stopped at Master Hand's office. He knocked.

"Come in!"

Marth took a deep breath, straightened his posture, and then walked into his destiny.


	23. Marth's Point of View: Part 4

The office was very orderly- mostly simple, brown furniture. Two chairs rested on either side of the doorway, and a brick fireplace stood against the wall on the left side of the wall. Portraits of two small gloved hands hung on the walls, along with a portrait of a larger hand with a blonde wig- Mother Hand?- in a rural landscape. Bookshelves with heavy black books were lined along the back of the room, almost like an unimportant afterthought of the interior decorators. Master Hand floated behind a plywood desk located in the center of the room. hovering a couple of inches above an aged, wooden chair. On the desk stood an enormous pile of paperwork, a small reading lamp, and a file that read **Marth: Altea Representative**. This caused Marth to nervously tug at the collar of his shirt and gulp.

"Marth, please take a seat." Master Hand said, looking up warily at the blue haired swordsman. Marth, not fully aware of what he was doing, walked step by step over to the chair in front of the desk. He pulled it back- did chairs usually make such an audible screech when moved?- and sat down.

"Marth, you and I both know why you are here," Master Hand spoke briskly as he picked up Marth's file and opened it. "The actions you are responsible for are indeed deplorable- accidental or not."

Marth nodded weakly. Master Hand continued.

"You are lucky that Zelda is not pressing charges, and God knows she'd have a plausible case if she decided to. However, her wound was fairly shallow, so let that salve your conscience."

Marth nodded again. Not letting his eyes meet Master Hand's, he studied a hangnail on his thumb.

"Marth, you've caused a lot of trouble for both you and I- I believe that I've received about 800 phone calls so far exhorting your canning."

"Maybe you should get a secretary." Marth mumbled. Master Hand narrowed his eyes.

"Now is not the time for witty remarks, Marth. I have plenty of reasons to fire you here and now."

Marth continued to look down at his hands. Master Hand cleared his throat.

"But I won't."

Marth coughed- or he might have laughed, he wasn't sure which. He wasn't going to get fired. No returning back to Altea in shame. No leaving Link, Ike, Luigi- no abandoning Zelda.

"You have caused me a lot of trouble, and you have incensed thousands of Super Smash Bros. fans- but people forgive and forget. It's human nature. You are still a valuable member of Super Smash Bros.- egregious as your actions may be."

Marth nodded, feeling a smile beginning to form on his face.

"This doesn't mean that the next time you outrage the world and perform illicit actions, you won't be canned. We cannot allow violent behavior to condone. But for now, I'm letting you get off with a punishment."

Marth nodded, the grin not falling from his face. He still had a job. He could still live in the mansion, in his wonderful room with his wonderful- if not frequently irate- roommates. He was safe.

"Marth, I'm afraid we are going to have to confiscate your weapons until after Thanksgiving. You also will be banned from tournaments until the end of the year- longer if the incident doesn't blow over quite as long as we are anticipating."

Marth nodded again, his fingers reaching for his belt to unlatch his sword from his belt. He laid his treasured weapon on the desk, and Master Hand respectfully nodded.

"We'll take good care of it. You are also grounded until the end of the month- that means no leaving the property unless it is for business purposes. No movies, no water parks, no parties."

"No Thanksgiving?" Marth asked weakly.

"I'm afraid not." Master Hand shook his head sympathetically. "You do understand that these are the measures we have to take- not only to punish you, but to make sure you are safe. There are a few Legend of Zelda psycho fans out there who want to do to you what you did to Zelda."

Marth glumly looked down at his hands. Master Hand opened a drawer and stashed Marth's file into it.

"I'm sorry, Marth. It's important that you lay low, at least for a while."

"Is that it?" Marth asked.

"One more thing. I need you to fetch me Link."

"Link?" Marth stammered. "C-can't you get somebody else?"

"Marth, it is important that you see that yours and Link's friendship is repaired. I don't want to see an accident ruin a friendship like this. And besides, the quicker Link forgives you, the quicker all the hype dies down."

Unable to escape from this impasse, Marth obliged. He got up from his chair and nodded to Master Hand.

"Thank you for keeping me here, sir. I promise nothing like this will ever happen again."

"Let's hope so." Master Hand said dryly. "Because next time, your charming dry wit won't be able to save you."

* * *

Marth felt an enormous amount of relief wash over him as he left the office. His punishment was a harsh one, but Marth thought it was fair. Only a terrible human being would harm such a pure person like Zelda- it was like wounding a unicorn. And there were a lot of people out there who knew this, and wanted Marth's blood.

But was Marth a terrible human being? He didn't think so. After all, it was all an accident. And if Zelda had faith in him, he had faith in himself.

Marth walked down the hallway into the stairway. As he walked down the brightly lit wooden steps, he felt hungrier than he had in days. He quickly decided the kitchen would be the first place he would look for his roommate.

As Marth exited the stairway, he came face to face with Samus. Her eyes narrowed and her countenance immediately became inscrutable.

"Hey Samus," Marth said, somewhat uneasily. Samus just walked past him, her ponytail brushing his face. Marth turned around to her back.

"Samus, I'm sorry I was so brisk the other day. I'm happy for you and Wolf."

Samus whipped around to face him. Her facial features remained enigmatic, but she stopped and lean against the rail. She bore her dark blue eyes into Marth's.

"Marth, there are other people you should be apologizing to," she said.

"I've already apologized to Zelda," Marth averred. Samus rolled her eyes.

"Great. Now you can start on the American public," she turned around and continued to walk up the stairs. Marth felt a pang of remorse as he watched the bounty hunter walk up the stairs. They had been such good friends before the incident. Would she forgive him?

Would anyone?

* * *

After glumly eating two bowls of ice cream in the kitchen, Marth began his search for Link. He started in the lounge, where he found nobody but Waluigi reading a book and Diddy Kong playing ping pong with Dixie Kong. Waluigi looked up and gave him an unfriendly scowl before looking back down at his book, **1000 Ways to Cook Green Capped Heroes**. Marth backtracked through the kitchen and walked through the back door. It was a particularly nice day out for a November afternoon, so many of the kids were splashing around in the pool. Peach and Lyn were sharing a cup of tea by the pool, while Samurai Goroh and Falco played a game of foosball. Marth quickly retreated back inside to the building as Peach got up and growled at him.

He checked the interior gym, the front yard and the training area, but found no Link. In the training area, however, he did find Ike and Isaac.

"Marth! How did the meeting with Master Hand go?" Isaac and Ike immediately halted their swordfight and jogged over to him.

"Fine. I'm not getting canned, but I'm grounded until December."

"No Thanksgiving party?" Isaac asked in disbelief. Marth shook his head. Ike patted him on the back.

"Well, I'm glad you're still here, in any case. Do you want to join our brawl?"

"No, I'm looking for Link. If you happen to see him, will you tell him I'm looking for him?"

"Will do." Isaac vigorously nodded. "Glad you're still here, dude."

"So am I," Marth gave the boy a small smile. He nodded to Ike and left.

After another 15 minutes, Marth walked up to his room. As he fumbled in his pocket for the key, he heard a voice behind him.

"Looking for someone?" Link's voice sounded behind him. Marth slowly turned around.

"How'd you know?"

"I ran into Ike on my way back from the hospital wing. They… just released Zelda."

Marth could tell that Link was opposed to this decision, but didn't say anything. Link spoke again.

"What do you need?"

"Master Hand wanted to see you,"

If Link was surprised, he didn't show it. He slowly nodded.

"Is that all?"

Marth nodded his head. The tension lingered in the air as the two swordsmen studied each other. Link began to walk away, but he stopped and hesitantly turned back.

"Marth, how did things go… y'know… with Master Hand?"

"Fine. I'm not going to get fired, but I'm grounded until the end of the month."

For a split second, Marth thought he saw Link's face relax into a look of relief and triumph, but when he blinked, Link's face was inscrutable yet again. Link nodded somewhat distantly.

"Alright," he turned his back and walked away towards the staircase. Marth sighed, found his key in his back pocket and entered his room.

* * *

Marth stayed in his room for most of the rest of the day, making calls to his publicist and calling family members assuring them of them that he had not been dismissed from his job. At 5 to 6:00, there was a knock on his door.

"Come on in," Marth called, looking up from his laptop. Ike entered the room. Marth closed his computer and looked at Ike.

"Dinner," Ike said, sitting down on his bed. "In 5 minutes."

"Alright," Marth put his laptop aside. "How was the training session?"

Ike shrugged. "It was fine. Isaac's skills are developing fast. I saw Sonic at the training room- he looked hopelessly lost."

Marth guiltily looked away. He was very behind on training with his apprentice. He doubted that Sonic would want to train with him anymore anyway.

"Thanks for sending Link to me," Marth changed the subject. Ike shrugged.

"No problem. Speaking of Link, it seems like you're not alone in your grounding."

"What?" Marth immediately straightened up.

"Master Hand took Link's weapons and grounded him until the end of the month. Just like you, man."

"What for?"

"It's for attacking you after you slashed Zelda. Master Hand says it was unacceptable, no matter what the circumstances were."

Marth had no idea how this news would affect his and Link's already intermitted friendship. "I had just attacked his girlfriend. I think that it was understandable."

"You could argue that your actions were understandable, seeing that yours was an accident."

Marth decided to let the subject drop. "I hear Zelda's out of the hospital wing?"

Ike nodded. "Yeah. She healed pretty quickly. Doesn't look like she was injured at all."

Butterflies suddenly flew into Marth's stomach. "Is… is she eating with the rest of us?"

"Why wouldn't she?" Ike asked, with indifference. "And speaking of eating, it's time for you to go down."

"Just me?"

"I have a date with Lyn," Ike said, somewhat unenthusiastically. "I'm sorry buddy."

"It's cool," Marth said, already dreading the notion of going down and getting lunch by himself. "You… have fun."

"Right back atcha."

Marth nodded to his friend and walked out the door.

* * *

Once again, the noise level in the cafeteria dropped a considerable amount once Marth entered. Marth wondered if they were informed that he was indeed keeping his job after his meeting with Master Hand. Trying not to draw attention to himself, Marth hastily grabbed a tray and walked to the buffet table.

He fell into line behind Bowser. The Koopa's back was turned, his large shell a few inches in front of Marth. Marth was concerned that if he tried to interact with the large turtle, he would be impaled by the large spikes. Marth tried to make conversation anyways.

"Hey Bowser. How are you doing?"

Bowser twisted his head around uncertainly, giving Marth a confused look. He froze for a few seconds, then turned his head back to the buffet table. Marth tried again.

"Those hamburgers look pretty tasty. Those fries look pretty damn crispy as well."

Bowser turned himself 90˚ and murmured to Marth out of the corner of his mouth. "Please don't talk to me, Marth."

His most loyal friend wouldn't speak to him. Marth felt terrible. Before he could stop himself, he blurted out, "Why?"

"Marth, you could have killed Zelda."

"You must have similar experiences with harming people accidentally. In fact, you set Meta Knight on fire a few days ago if I remember correctly!"

Bowser rolled his eyes exasperatedly. "Yeah, but the damage I cause is always in the realm of comedy. Nobody_ actually_ gets hurt. The injuries are simply transient. Observe."

Bowser stuck out his foot and tripped Fox, who happened to be walking by. Fox fell over the buffet table and face first into a deep fryer of oil. The fox pulled his face out, his fur singed and a third degree burn on his face. Fox screamed, and ran into the bathroom. Marth turned to Bowser, horrified.

"That was awful!"

"Watch," Bowser said calmly. After 15 seconds, Fox walked out of the bathroom whistling. His fur and face was completely back to normal.

Bowser picked up his plate of food and put it onto his tray. He shot a somewhat sympathetic glance at Marth.

"I'm sorry, Marth. I wish what happened didn't happen, but it did." Bowser walked over to a table where Pit, Yoshi, Meta Knight and Peach. From one glance from Peach, Marth inferred that he was not welcome there. He sighed, grabbed a plate, and set out on a table hunt.

"Marth! Come over here!"

Marth's heart skipped a beat as he heard the lovely, melodious voice of Zelda. He turned around so quickly that his hamburger almost slid off the plate, his face going red. Zelda gave him a kind smile from a table near the center of the room. Sitting with her was K.K. Slider, Isaac, Luigi, Link and Samus. Marth felt his face go slightly redder as he saw the bounty hunter and the green clad swordsman. Marth walked over to the table and took a seat in between Luigi and Zelda.

"Good to see you, Marth. We thought you weren't coming down for a second." Luigi said, taking a napkin and wiping his moustache.

"Oh no, I wouldn't want to miss the silent treatment my fellow smashers have given me in recognition of my infamy." Marth said dryly. Samus gave a small chuckle.

"Oh, infamy my ass. It was an accident, for Christ's sake." Isaac shoved some French fries into his mouth ravenously. Marth gave a brief glance over at Link- he had suddenly become very interested in his shoelaces.

"That's right," Zelda said softly. "And people still have faith in you, Marth. You've been allowed to keep your job, haven't you?"

Marth tried to cover his blushing by shoving a hamburger into his mouth. He swallowed and nodded.

"They couldn't have fired him," Luigi said confidently. "There are to many people both inside and outside of the mansion backing him."

"There are also a fair amount of people who want his blood," Samus pointed out casually, dipping a French fry into ketchup.

"As soon as Marth makes a public apology, everything will be fine," Zelda retorted. Samus arched an eyebrow skeptically.

"So Marth gave me a tiny flesh wound. People-" Zelda was cut off by Link.

"_Minor_ flesh wound, Zelda?"

Zelda's blue eyes flashed as she turned to Link. "Link, I was only in the hospital wing for two days."

"You _needed_ to be in there longer." Link growled.

"Link, I'm a grown adult. I think I'm competent to make my own decisions."

Link's face turned red. "You're not the only person who gets a say in this, Zelda. I-"

Zelda stared at Link with her cold, blue eyes. "I'm not a child, Link."

"Well you certainly need to be watched like one!" Link pushed his chair back and stood up. The cafeteria had gone silent- everybody's eyes were focused on Link and Zelda. Link grimaced, already regretting his statement. But it was to late. Zelda, her face turning red, got up as well.

"Is that all you see me as, Link? An inept child who needs constant supervision and saving?"

"No, Zelda," Link stuttered, the tables suddenly turned. "No, I'm just saying."

"It's true that I have needed… assistance… more than once. But Link, I'm not the bemused, unable 16 year old girl. Not anymore. I'm a grown woman, and until you can see me that way…" Zelda's voice cracked, but no tears formed at her eyes. She hesitated for a brief second, but her voice rebounded and she spoke firmly to Link. "I think we should stop seeing each other."

She turned heel and walked away, leaving Link bewildered, his jaw slightly agape and his eyebrows raised. He took a step toward the hallway in which Zelda has walked out of, but turned and walked to the living room slowly instead. There was silence in the room. As the frosty silence hung in the air, Marth and Luigi turned to each other and exchanged glances that confirmed each other's thoughts:

This was just the eye of the inevitable storm.

* * *

Bustman: I know that I only said that I would give you 4 chapters from Marth's point of view, but an additional one is being added. His story isn't finished quite yet. The more reviews that come in, the earlier the next chapter comes- that's the way of the game. I hope you enjoyed!


	24. Marth's Point of View: Part 5

"Link, come on! Slow up, won't you?"

"I want some alone time."

Luigi sighed, and continued to run after Link. Isaac and Samus raced after him, and Marth uneasily followed, unsure if he was being out of line following Link. Link paid no heed to any of them, however, and continued walking up toward Starlight Hill.

"Link, we're you're friends. Can we please talk?" Luigi asked pleadingly.

Link stopped and spun around, his eyes fierce. "I only had one true friend in this mansion, and that was Zelda. And because of _him_—" Link pointed an accusing finger at Marth, who shrunk back. "—now I've lost her."

"I'm gonna head back to the mansion." Marth mumbled. Samus shook her head.

"Nuh-uh. We're gonna sort things out _now_," she asserted, turning to Marth. She turned back to Link. "Link, you're overreacting to this. First of all, I can tell you that there is no way in hell that Zelda will ever give up on being your friend. Anybody who sees you two will tell you that."

"Well, I—" Link cut in aggressively.

"Let me finish." Samus hissed. "Secondly, you have no idea whether or not Zelda meant it as a temporary break-up or not."

"What the hell do you mean, _temporary break-up?"_ Link jeered.

"Link, let's not kid ourselves here. Smash Mansion is the equivalent of Hollywood. We're celebrities, Link. It's a temporary break-up." Luigi said.

"Publicity purposes, usually." Isaac piped up. Luigi nodded.

"Right."

Samus rolled her eyes. "Yeah, okay, right. And thirdly, Link, you have no right to accuse Marth of breaking you and Zelda up."

"It would have never happened if he had never cut open her stupid shoulder." Link spat.

"It never would have happened if you hadn't reacted _so poorly to it._" Luigi corrected. Link shook his head and continued to walk up toward the hill. The three followed him.

"Link, come on! Let's try to sort this out right here, right now!" Samus shouted up to him. Once again, Link turned around.

"What do you guys not understand about this? I want to be _ALONE! _Will you guys just stop following me?"

"You're running away from your problems, Link!" Samus shouted. Marth touched her shoulder.

"Maybe we should leave him alone. His girlfriend did just break up with him."

Samus coldly swatted his hand off of her shoulder. "It digs deeper than that, Marth. We're doing this because you're being a _scared little bitch_ about this and avoiding making up with him." She began to walk away.

"Don't call me a bitch," Marth growled. Samus whipped around to face him again, eyes narrowed.

"Okay, so what are you then? You've made _no attempt_ to try to make up with your best friend because your _scared_ that he'll reject you."

"Guys, let's cool it," Isaac said cautiously. They ignored him.

"It digs deeper than that." Marth said quietly.

"Oh yeah? What more is there to it? Because as far as I can see, you've become the _passive_ variable in the relationship. You have to wait until Link says its okay before you're friendship starts getting repaired again."

Marth opened his mouth, closed it, froze for a second, then turned and walked down the hill. He didn't look back.

Marth had always been a strategic player. He planned ahead, always knew what his next move would be. In Super Smash Bros, if you didn't have a whole lot of brawn, you needed to have a whole lot of brains.

But for the first time in Marth's life, he was completely unsure of what to do.

Just a few days ago, things had been so simple. Link was his best friend, and his crush on Zelda was always just something that was forced to be forgone for the sake of his and Link's friendship.

It only took a matter of days for everything to change. Just a matter of days.

When Samus had accused him of being too scared to attempt to make up with Link, she was overlooking a huge variable; Zelda. Now, after so many years of being the third wheel, having to be a spectator as Link and Zelda grew closer and closer, here was his chance. His one chance, probably ever, to get what _he wanted._ To pursue the girl of his dreams. To cast aside guilt and go with his gut.

But he knew that most likely it would push his and Link's relationship to a point beyond repair. So here lay the question;

Should he sacrifice his and Link's friendship for the girl of his dreams, or should he attempt to make amends with Link and return to square one?

Either way, would Link ever be friends with him again?

* * *

Ike called at around 9:00pm to warn Marth that he was staying overnight at a motel with Lyn, and wouldn't be there until the morning. Marth pretended it was no big deal, and told Ike to have a blast. As soon as he hung up, though, he sighed.

"I'm dead."

Ike not being there meant that he had a night in the room with just Link and himself. Marth had no idea how much Link might have cooled off at Starlight Hill, but either way, it was still looking to be an awkward night.

Link walked into the room at around 10:30. Marth, who was reading a book on his bed, uneasily set it down and got up. "Link…?"

Link didn't acknowledge Marth. Instead, he threw his jacket off, grabbed a toothbrush, headed into the bathroom and shut the door. Marth grimaced, and sat back down on his bed, defeated. Crickets chirped outside, and a cold draft drifted into the room. Marth got up and shut the window.

When Link got out of the bathroom, he immediately climbed into bed and turned off his light. Marth continued to read, remaining wary of his friend.

Half an hour passed. Marth had been rereading the same page for five minutes now. Marth leaned back, discouraged, and rubbed his thumb and index finger along the bridge of his nose. He looked over at Link, who was pretending to be asleep. He was breathing unevenly, and snoring a bit too loud. Marth put down his book and opened his mouth, wanting to speak. However, he changed his mind, and turned out the light.

When Marth woke up, it was still pitch dark out. He grappled for his phone on the night stand, looking for the time. He narrowed his eyes as the light shone up into his face. His clock read 1:22. He rubbed his eyes and put the phone back facedown on the nightstand, as not to wake Link. He put his face in his pillow and tried to go back to sleep.

That's when he heard something.

It was a sniffling of sorts, almost like an anteater trying to suck up ants with a clogged nose. Marth thinking it must be Ray, paid no heed to the sound. But suddenly, he heard a gasp for air and a voice cracking. A male voice. Someone he knew well.

Marth brought himself into a sitting position on his arms and looked over at Link's bed. Link's back was turned to him, but Marth could see Link's shoulders shaking as he shed his tears. There was another shaky intake of breath and the sound of sniffing up snot.

Link was crying.

Not once in Marth's life had he ever seen his best friend cry. Ike had always been the crier of the three, and Marth did cry on occasion; whenever he had been hurt badly, after a particularly hard breakup, after deaths in the family.

But no matter what happened, Link never cried. No matter how terrible things got, no matter how serious an injury he received, Link always just sort of shook it off. Even when he received the news that his grandmother had died in a raid against his hometown, Link just turned stoneface for a week.

By principle, Link had to be the bigger man. His emotions could never be unleashed, because he was afraid that it might minimize his reputation and masculinity. His outlet was usually just keeping to himself.

But the Hero of Time was crying.

And Marth knew that the tears were for Zelda.

After that, the tears came to a slow stop, and Marth tried to go back to sleep. But he couldn't. Even as he saw Link's body heave rhythmically as he began to sleep, Marth could not imitate him.

He decided that maybe a cup of hot chocolate would settle him back down. Marth got up, threw a pair of jeans on, and tiptoed into the hall.

Everything was silent in the hallway. The only light came from the doorway of the stair entrance, down at the end of the hall.

As Marth tiptoed down the steps, he heard the soft melody of "Every Rose Has It's Thorn". He got off on the second floor and went into the kitchen. The noise got louder. He suddenly spotted K.K. strumming a guitar on the balcony. Marth rubbed his eyes to make sure he wasn't seeing things, and walked toward the balcony.

As Marth opened the screen door, K.K. casually looked backwards and noticed Marth. He continued playing, but he said, "Couldn't sleep?"

"No," Marth said quietly, sitting down in one of the balcony chairs. "How about you?"

"I come out here to play sometimes," he said simply. "It's nice to perform in front of an audience, but sometimes you've got to play for yourself."

"I guess I get that," Marth said, looking distantly off. K.K. threw him a quick glance, and then looked off with him. There was a moment of silence.

"Still having problems, I assume?" K.K. asked. Marth sighed.

"My life is so messed up."

"That's why I like to keep to myself." K.K. murmured. "Nothing bad can really happen to you when you keep to yourself."

"Not a lot of good comes out of it, either," Marth said flatly. K.K. shrugged.

"Matter of opinion, I suppose."

There was another moment of silence. K.K. spoke again.

"You and Link still fighting?"

"I'm not fighting. But he won't forgive me. Now he blames me for their breakup."

"Bah," K.K. stopped strumming his guitar briefly to wave the notion away with his paw. "He's just looking for someone beside himself to blame,"

"In a weird way, I can't help but think he's right, though." Marth said softly. K.K. shook his head.

"Naw, he's just look-"

"I know, and I think you're right. But I can't stop feeling guilty about it." Marth cut K.K. off. "Like, unintentionally, maybe I did want to break them up."

K.K. arched an eyebrow. "And why would you want to do that?"

Marth looked down as K.K.'s curious brown eyes studied him. "I've sort of had a crush on Zelda ever since I laid eyes on her,"

"And she's your best friend's girl. I understand." K.K. leaned back, nodding. Marth continued.

"And now she's finally available. But I know that if I made a move on her, Link and I's friendship would become unrepairable. But I don't know if he's ever going to forgive me anyways."

"I see," K.K. said sympathetically. "You're torn between two important people in your life."

"That's one way to put it," Marth mumbled. "What do you think, K.K.?"

K.K. sighed wearily. "Link, I'm not someone who tells people what to do. But..." K.K. paused. "Can I sing you a song?"

"Sure," Marth said apathetically. K.K. smiled, and strummed a G chord.

_I once met a miniature poodle_

_ We fell in love that very day_

_ She infiltrated my noodle_

_ And melted my heart away_

_ We sang romantic harmonies_

_ In which our love was enlaced_

_ And we played our lovesick melodies_

_ She on piano, and I on the bass_

_ We eloped together three weeks later_

_ And we bought a home and hopped on a bus_

_ A very modest one acre_

_ But it was more than enough for us_

_ As our time together grew longer_

_ Our bonds failed to get stronger_

_ As I was enveloped in my music_

_ She became more and more homesick_

_ One day I came up and asked her,_

_ 'Would you travel the world with me?'_

_ We could go from city to city_

_ And play sweet symphonies_

_ And with one shake of her head_

_ And one sad look she said_

_ 'I know that I cannot do it,_

_ But if you want to go,_

_ Become a virtuoso_

_ Don't wait, go on, get to it!'_

_ I knew that with every passing day_

_ She missed her home a little bit more_

_ But it would hurt me just as much to say_

_ 'Goodbye', and walk out the door_

_ I was torn, I simply could not decide_

_ Should I stay, or do I depart?_

_ But her recommendation I had to abide_

_ I knew I would deep in my heart_

_ And so my love for music won over_

_ It hurt me more than words can describe_

_ I packed up a bag and went up to my love_

_ And kissed her a sweet goodbye_

_ Since then I have not found another_

_ Who can sing the same beautiful way_

_ But I sang of her_

_ I cried for her_

_ I played for her in Rooster's café_

"Gee, that one made me feel better," Marth said dryly as K.K. finished.

"It wasn't supposed to make you feel good," K.K. said calmly. "It's a song about the crossroads, the big decisions we have to make in life. You have to pick what's more important to you; being Zelda's one and only, or regaining Link's trust. You have to value one over the other."

"It's hard," Marth said sadly. K.K. nodded.

"I empathize with you. I felt the same way about Elisabeth."

"Elisabeth?"

"That was her name," K.K. said, somewhat sorrowfully. He got up and looked at Marth.

"You're going to have to choose sometime, Marth. Look ahead. Imagine your life in five years if you chose wooing Zelda, and then do the same for repairing your friendship with Link. You're smart, Marth," K.K. picked up his guitar and walked toward the door. "You'll figure out what to do."

Marth just looked up at the moon as K.K. walked away.

* * *

As Marth put a bowl of cereal on his tray, he spotted Zelda walk into the cafeteria. He quickly set his tray down and walked over to her. He knew what he had to do.

"Hey Zelda, can we talk for a sec?"

Zelda gave Marth a small smile and turned to face him. "Sure."

Marth blushed a little bit. "Um—outside?"

"Oh—oh, okay." Zelda nodded. She turned and walked toward the door. Marth followed her.

A gust of fresh, warm, morning air welcomed them as they stepped outside. She turned to face Marth, and he nodded toward the bench swing hanging down from the large sycamore tree in front of the mansion. The two walked up to it.

"Nice day out," Marth observed as the two sat down. Zelda smiled.

"One of the few nice days left before winter hits."

"I guess so," Marth nodded. "Um, so listen Zelda, I wanted to talk about you and Link."

Her blue eyes scrutinized him. "Yes?"

Marth nervously swallowed and said, "I don't think you wanted to break up with him."

Zelda arched an eyebrow. "How do you know what I want?"

Marth pushed down his nervousness and lust for the girl he was talking to. He looked up at her calmly. "It doesn't take rocket science to know that you're in love with him."

Zelda froze for a second. Marth smiled.

"And it's obvious that he's in love with you."

"He's controlling. He cheats me like I'm a child," Zelda responded. Marth shook his head.

"He cares about you, Zelda. A lot. He might get overprotective sometimes because of that, but it's only because he never wants you to get hurt."

Zelda was silent. Marth continued.

"Listen, I know why you did it. It was for me, wasn't it?"

Zelda looked up. "What are you talking about?"

"You did it to stand up for me. You felt like you had to distance yourself from anyone who kicked me while I was down. You broke up with Link to make a point."

Zelda opened her mouth, but she was lost for words.

"And as your friend, I appreciate that. I really do. But as Link's friend… I want you two to make up. You without him is like peanut butter without jelly." Marth smiled. Zelda finally shook her head slowly and chuckled.

"How is it that you know me so well?"

"Years of knowing Link," Marth winked. "Listen, you don't have to worry about me. I can stand up for myself. And in a while, this whole thing will blow over. But I don't want you to be dragged down just because I did something stupid. I want you and Link to make up."

Zelda gave another small chuckle and looked away. "You know, for a while I thought that you and me could work as a couple."

Marth winced, but shook it off before Zelda could notice. "Yeah. Yeah, I thought that for a while too," he paused. "But you know that could never happen."

Zelda gave Marth a small smile and laid her hands gently on top of his. "You're a good friend, Marth. To both me and Link."

Marth smiled back at her. "I hope so."

* * *

Link walked into the room as Marth was watching a Paul Rudd movie on the TV. Marth looked up and smiled as he saw Link walk in.

"Heya," he turned the movie off. "How are things?"

Link slowly tossed his keys on the bed and looked up at him, his countenance still somewhat shielded. "They're…good."

There was a moment of silence. Link spoke again. "You convinced her, didn't you?"

"Did what?" Marth asked.

"You talked to Zelda and convinced her to make up with me." Link said quietly. "Didn't you?"

Marth slowly nodded, hiding a smile. "Yeah."

Before Marth was entirely sure what was happening, Link had gotten him in a bear hug. Marth's wind was knocked out of him.

"Link," Marth gasped. "I can't breathe—"

Link stepped back, but kept a hand on Marth's shoulder. "Thank you," he said sincerely.

"Yeah, well, you had looked miserable long enough," Marth remarked. Link laughed for the first time in days.

"You're a good friend, you know that?"

Marth chuckled. "So I've heard."

* * *

Bustman: And that brings a conclusion to Marth's point of view on the story. Really sorry this chapter is six months late, the story was on a brief hiatus. Finishing middle school is a lot of work. But I hope to put up a new chapter soon! Hope you enjoyed, and don't forget to review!


	25. Suspension

Bustman: I'm here with another chapter! And it hasn't even been a year!

Crazy Hand: Hurrah!

Bustman: Yes, hurrah indeed! And better yet, we're running at a 5.5 review average!

Crazy Hand: Hurra—wait, what?

Bustman: Yessiree. So look, here's the deal. I don't update until I get at least five and a half reviews.

Crazy Hand: Bustman, I don't think there's such a thing as a half review…

Bustman: What do you know? You're a hand.

Crazy Hand: A _gloved _hand, thank you very much.

Bustman: Just give the disclaimer.

Crazy Hand: Bustman does not own anything. But this story. About characters he does not own. Who coexist in a context that he creates. But is often derived from past Nintendo settings that—

Bustman: Alright, good job Crazy. Please do review! And enjoy!

* * *

"I spy, with my little eye… something silver."

"The coffeemaker."

"Yup."

Marth pressed his face into his hands and moaned. The two swordsmen were sitting at a counter in a totally barren kitchen. Link broke the silence.

"I wonder what's going on at the party."

_One hour earlier…_

_ "J4."_

_ "You sunk my battleship."_

_ "Hey guys!" Falco burst into the kitchen, interrupting Link and Marth's game of Battleship. "We won the soccer tournament! Now Funky Kong is taking everyone in the mansion out for pizza!"_

_ "Can we come?" Marth asked excitedly._

_ "Hell no!" Falco grabbed a bucket of beers. "You guys are suspended!" Falco ran out. From afar, they could hear him shout "C'mon, guys! Let's go have more fun then we've ever had!"_

_ "Or ever will!" Mario added in cheerily. The smashers piled onto the bus and drove away while Link and Marth watched in disappointment._

"I'm sure it's not that great." Marth said glumly.

* * *

"Hey guys!" Funky Kong burst into the party room. "Let's move this party to the lounge! There's a DJ and chicken nuggets!"

There was a cheer from everyone in the lounge as they piled out. Only Zelda and Samus remained in the now abandoned party room. Zelda rolled her eyes, picked up her dress, and sat down.

"Boys," she murmured.

"What're you going to do?" Samus asked , taking a seat next to Zelda. Zelda smiled.

"It's getting harder to find gentlemen these days, that's all. I appreciate a man who's more…"

"Corteous?" Samus suggested. Zelda nodded.

"Yeah,"

Samus shrugged. "I don't much care what kind of a guy it is as long as he's inferior to me."

Zelda grinned. "Is that some kind of shot at your boyfriend?"

Samus rolled her eyes, but smiled a bit as well. "Oh, shut up. Wolf is fine."

"You aren't bursting with enthusiasm." Zelda pointed out.

"Me and Wolf aren't going to last long," Samus said casually. "I only agreed to go out with him because he's really good in bed."

"_Samus_," Zelda put her hand over her open mouth and giggled. Samus smiled.

"What? I like hairy guys, sue me."

"Well I like _gentlemen._" Zelda said firmly. Samus rolled her eyes.

"Whatever you say," she said skeptically. "You'd better thank you're lucky stars you made up with Link, because gentlemen in Smash Mansion are few and far between.

"Marth's a gentleman." Zelda pointed out. Samus shrugged.

"He needs to grow a pair."

"You are so _mean,_" Zelda rolled her eyes. Samus suddenly frowned.

"Hold on a sec," Samus got up, walked to the door leading to the adjacent room, and looked in. She turned back, still frowning.

"Speaking of Marth and Link, where are they?"

"Suspended, remember?" Zelda said, as Samus walked back to her seat. "They can't leave the mansion."

"That sucks," Samus said, with what sounded like genuine sympathy. She paused. "What do you think they're doing back there?"

"I'm sure they're having enough fun." Zelda murmured.

* * *

"All by myself… don't want to be, all by myself…"

"Will you _stop singing?"_ Marth growled. The two of them were trekking back down from the top of Starlight Hill. The two had become very irritable when Link accidentally knocked down a hornet's net when he was attempting to reach an apple. Link sniffled in response to Marth's request.

"Nobody appreciates my talents."

Marth rolled his eyes and pushed Link into a brush. Link chuckled, got up, and caught up to Marth.

"Are you going to shut up now?" Marth asked.

"Oh, come on. No need to be so prickly." Link maintained his smile.

"You didn't get completely covered in hornet stings." Marth growled. Link shrugged.

"It wasn't my fault that you forgot to put on bug repellent."

Marth climbed over a log and kept walking. Link jumped over it and followed. He began to whistle.

"Someone's euphoric." Marth smiled a little bit. Link grinned.

"It's love, man. You don't realize how much you take it for granted before you lose it."

Marth looked down and nodded. Link noticed a flash of resentment go across Marth's face. Link raised an eyebrow.

"How's your love life going?"

"Everyone here is taken." Marth tried to sound as casual as possible.

"There's always Jigglypuff." Link laughed as Marth shoved him once again. "Relax, I'm kidding. There's plenty of fish in the sea outside of the mansion."

"Yeah, well, we can't go outside of the mansion, can we?" Marth pointed out as the two reached the back door of the mansion.

"That's true," Link rubbed his chin as the two walked into the kitchen. "If only we could go to the Thanksgiving party. There'd be plenty of fresh faces for you there."

"If only," Marth sighed. He abruptly stopped and furrowed his eyebrows. Link turned around.

"What?" Link asked curiously. Marth indicated toward the open door.

"I hear music."

The two walked out into the hallway. Link suddenly noticed a sign pointing to a staircase he had never seen before. The sign read **Rooster's Café ~ Down These Stairs**. Link raised an eyebrow and elbowed Marth, who turned to see the same thing.

"How come I've never seen that staircase before?" Marth frowned.

"Oh, it's a new section of the mansion. Bustman is constantly adding these to create new settings for the story," Fox said casually, as he strolled past them. Falco groaned.

"Fourth wall, remember?"

"Hey, aren't you guys at the party right now?" Link asked.

"Oh yeah, that's righ—" the two of them suddenly disappeared. Link sighed.

"I hate living outside of the realm of reality."

* * *

Rooster's café was a small, dimly lit little venue. At the front of the café was a small coffee bar, which a green bird stood behind. He looked up dully at the two smashers, and then looked back down to the dirty mug he was cleaning. In the back of the room, Link was surprised to see K.K. Slider playing his acoustic guitar on a small stage. Link waved.

"Hey, K.K."

K.K. didn't stop playing, but nodded in acknowledgement of the two smashers. As Link lowered his hand, Marth nudged him softly.

"Look," he whispered, indicating toward the coffee bar. Link looked toward where Marth's finger was pointing, and immediately raised an eyebrow. Two smashers were sitting at the bar, each on opposite ends. On one end was a passed out Captain Falcon, a few drinks scattered in front of him. On the other side was Peach, looking glumly down at her coffee. Link shot a confused look at Marth, who returned it with equal bamboozlement. The two cautiously approached the sullen princess.

"Hey Peach," Link said uncertainly, drawing up a seat next to her. Peach looked up and took notice of the two smashers. She sniffled. "Oh, hey Link… Marth."

Marth hesitantly nodded. Things had been tense between Peach and himself ever since she had decided to hate his guts after the whole Zelda incident. Most of the smashers, with the encouragement of Link and Zelda, had found it in their hearts to forgive Marth—however, Peach still acted coldly towards him. Nevertheless, he took a seat on the other side of Peach. She didn't object.

"You aren't looking too hot, Peach." Link observed. "I mean, er, your looking down. You always look beautiful." Link added quickly, as Peach gave him the death glare. She seemed to relax a little bit and took a small sip of coffee.

"I know. I'm a wreck," she murmured. "I'm waiting for someone."

"Mario?" It didn't take long for Link to guess. She sighed and nodded.

"He's supposed to take me furniture shopping. I'm redecorating my house," she explained, as both Link and Marth raised eyebrows. "He said that he'd take me today a week ago… we've already had to reschedule twice." Peach went on. "And when this party came up… well, he said he'd come back early to take me. But now…" she looked up at the clock helplessly, and tears began to well up in her eyes. "Now it doesn't look as if he's going to keep his word."

"Here," Link handed the princess a tissue, who dabbed her eyes with it.

"Thanks," she mumbled. Marth stared down at his thumbs while Link consoled Peach. He finally spoke up.

"So, er… furniture means a lot to you, eh?"

Peach met Marth's timidly asked question in an irritated tone. "_Yes, _Marth. That's why I have four hundred couches and over a hundred thousand rugs."

"Why does it concern Mario, though?" Marth inquired, trying not to back down. Peach's irate eyes transformed back into disappointed ones. She softly sighed.

"He wanted to move in. The furniture was for his portion of the house."

Marth nodded, his blue eyes softening at the sight of the defeated princess. Link put his arm around her shoulder and squeezed reassuringly. Peach looked up at the small green bird behind the counter.

"Get me a cosmopolitan, please."

The bird adjusted his glasses and scratched his head. "Miss, this is a house of java…"

"Does it look like I care?" Peach snapped. The bird automatically shrunk back.

"N—no, ma'am… a cosmopolitan is no problem… I'll have that for you right away." The bird took off, searching for vodka. Peach wiped some snot away from her nose.

"I'm such a bitch."

"We know," Marth said nonchalantly. Peach shot daggers at him with her eyes. Marth, realizing his err, quickly backtracked. "I mean, no, of course you're not…"

"Yeah, that's why Mario has been avoiding you!" Captain Falcon snorted, still half-asleep from the other end of the bar. He was knocked out again as Peach threw a turnip at him. The princess leaned back and exhaled, obviously upset.

"Don't listen to him," Link advised. "I'm sure that Mario has valid reasons for not being able to make it back."

"There was one time when he prioritized a carrot cake over me." Peach sniffled. Link and Marth both raised eyebrows. Peach rubbed her eyes. "That was the day I invited him over for carrot cake.

"Link? Marth?"

Zelda's voice rang out from the stairway. Both Link and Marth's heads shot up.

"Zelda? Is that you?" Link asked, slowly getting up.

"Yeah," she walked down the steps into the café, Samus right behind her. "The party was kind of lame, so we decided to come back and give you guys company."

"Not that you need it, clearly," Samus frowned, looking around the room at Peach, Captain Falcon and K.K. Slider. "What's he doing here?" she jerked a thumb toward Captain Falcon.

"I don't think he was invited to the party." Peach said. Samus scratched her head.

"I thought the party was for the whole mansion?"

"Master Hand temporarily fired him so that he didn't ruin the party." Peach explained. A thought struck her suddenly. "Did you guys see Mario leave the party?"

"Nope." Samus sat down and took a toothpick out of her pocket. She popped it into her mouth. "Last I saw him, he was flirting with a cluster of girls."

Peach's face went from shocked, to appalled, to enraged, and then to just flat-out disappointed. She got up, clearly fighting back tears, and exited the café. Zelda shot Samus a _you are so tactless_ look and followed her friend. Samus scrunched up her eyebrows.

"What's her problem?"

"She has some kind of messed up perception that Mario values her over carrot cake." Marth mumbled. This just made Samus more confused.

Link sighed and shook his head. "Forget it. It's between her and Mario."

The small green bird came out with a vodka glass. "Cosmopolitan?"

Samus shrugged and took the drink. The three sat in the café in sad silence, listening to Peach's muffled tears upstairs.

* * *

Bustman: This was a bit of a weird chapter that I wanted to make funnier… but ah well. This chapter will lead to funnier ones. Please, please, review, and I hoped you enjoyed! The next chapter will be up soon!


	26. High Drama

Bustman: Hey guys, I'm back with my quickest update since… well, ever, I think. I did feel bad, as I acknowledge that there was not a whole lot going on in the last chapter. So I tried to pack this considerably longer chapter with drama, comedy, romance, and awesomeness. Remember, I don't own anything. Enjoy, and please review!

* * *

"I can't believe you made me leave early. I was totally going to hook up with that chick."

"Hook up with that chick?" Fox snorted. "You mean the one who thought you were a parrot?"

"And wanted to adopt you?" Sonic chimed in. Falco turned red under his feathers.

"Shut up! She was into me, okay?"

"Into tropical birds, maybe." Samurai Goroh scoffed. Mario chuckled as Falco gave the samurai the evil eye. The five smashers were walking back from the party, which had just ended. The bus had left without them, so the five were forced to trek back to the mansion. The moon hung suspended over them as they walked through the cold, night air. Light from streetlamps illuminated the road, but all of the buildings and stores around them were dark. Mario checked his watch. It read 11:32.

"You have a curfew?"

Mario looked up to see Fox walking beside him. His tone did not seem to mock Mario, only show genuine interest. Mario sighed.

"Peachie likes me home earlier than this. Gets worried about me if I'm out to late."

Fox nodded sympathetically as the group turned onto a smaller road. "I know what you mean. Krystal always thinks I've been kidnapped or gone out to fight in some epic battle when I'm out late, y'know?" Fox chuckled. "People generally assume that heroes are doing something more life-threatening then going to a party."

"Believe me, I know what you mean." Mario said dryly, as they arrived at the gate leading into the mansion's property. "Once I was out past ten in the Mushroom Kingdom, and they sent a search party out looking for me. Also sent a rescue team over to Bowser's Castle. Turns out, all I was doing was helping a friend move… furniture…" Mario stopped cold in his tracks. Fox frowned and turned to his friend.

"Mario?"

"I'm dead." The plumber said in a small voice. Fox shook his head.

"No, you're just immobile."

"I mean I'm _going to be dead once we enter the doors of that mansion._" Mario huffed.

"Oh. Well then you should of said 'Imma be dead'." Fox shrugged. Mario arched an eyebrow.

"I'mma be?"

"No you aren't. You're a plumber."

"Hey, slowpokes!" Sonic called from ahead. "You coming or what?"

"Yeah, hold on a sec." Mario called back. He shoved his hands into his sweater pockets and began to walk. Fox followed him.

"So why are you going to be dead?"

"Because I'm an idiot," Mario mumbled. "I missed an appointment that was important to Peach."

Fox scratched his chin. "An appointment?"

"Yes, an appointment. I was supposed to go shop for furniture."

"I thought you were moving furniture." Fox replied. Mario rolled his eyes.

"That was a story!"

"You mean you were lying to me?"

"No!" Mario threw his hands up into the air. "That was _in_ the story."

"Oh. So if it was in the story, why is Peach going to be angry at you?"

"No, the other thing! The other thing was in the story, _this_ thing is in reality." Mario said through his teeth. Fox furrowed his eyebrows.

"Wait, is there a difference?"

"Look, the bottom line is, I missed a big appointment that Peach is going to kill me for." Mario sighed. "We've already had to reschedule twice."

"Well, if it's rescheduled, what's the problem?"

"Forget it." Mario muttered, as the group of five walked up to the mansion. Samurai Goroh walked up to the door, but did a double-take and backtracked. He looked into the window next to the door, and started grinning. He turned to Mario.

"Hey lover boy, Peach is in the kitchen. And she don't look too happy."

Mario gulped. "How 'not happy'?"

"She's twirling a knife in her hands." Sonic said casually, as he, Samurai Goroh, and Falco walked into the mansion. Mario groaned. Fox patted him on the back.

"Good luck."

"Thanks." Mario murmured, as Fox entered the mansion as well. He stood outside for a couple of minutes, as he heard words exchanged within the mansion. The exchange ended with Peach growling and footsteps running up the stairs. Mario erected his body, took a deep breath, and walked into the mansion.

The lights in the lounge were off. Directly connected to the lounge was the kitchen. Peach leaned against the kitchen doorway, looking coolly at Mario. Mario tried to meet her cold, blue gaze.

"Peach, hon, I can explain…"

"I'd like to hear your explanation." Peach said calmly. Mario nervously scratched his moustache.

"Can we talk in the kitchen?"

"Help yourself." Peach jerked her head toward the illuminated kitchen. Mario walked past her and sat down at the table. He took his cap off and ran his head through his ruffled brown hair. Peach took a seat across from him.

"So, you missed the appointment. For the third time."

"Hey, at least I'm consistent." Mario attempted the joke; Peach was not amused. He sighed and leaned back in his chair.

"Peach, sweetie, I just lost track of time…"

"Haven't heard that one before." Peach said flatly. Mario looked down guiltily.

"Peachie, it won't happen again."

"That's what you said the first time." Peach said calmly. "And the time after that."

Mario looked up pleadingly. "Please, honey, I—"

"This can't keep happening, Mario." Peach said, her face not betraying any emotion. "You can't keep forgetting, you can't keep blowing me off. Especially when this is something that we were doing _for you_."

"I know, and I feel terrible. I'm going to try to never let it happen again." Mario looked at her anxiously. "Okay?"

Peach met his gaze for a few seconds. There was silence in the mansion. Finally, Peach shook her head.

"It's not okay, Mario." She said softly. "I know that I've always been labeled the damsel in distress, the woman that can't fight for herself, but _that's not the case_. I'm a strong woman, Mario. And you need to be able to acknowledge that before you can treat me with the respect I deserve."

"I do acknowledge that, sweetiepie! And—" Mario began to respond.

"No you don't." Peach cut him off. "You can't expect that whenever you save me, it will make everything alright. Like I have no choice but to love the man who rescues me. Like I have some kind of obligation to you. Some kind of obligation to love you." Peach paused. "And I do love you, Mario. Not because you always rescue me, but because you understand me. You might not understand _that_, but you do understand _me_. You understand me more than anybody else in this mansion."

Mario looked up sadly at Peach. She met him with her strong, blue gaze. She took a breath and shut her eyes.

"So understand me when I say it's over, Mario. At least for now," she opened her eyes. "Please… don't take it to hard."

Mario's expression had become mixed with shock and sorrow. He blinked helplessly as Peach got up. She hesitated as she walked by him, but continued on. He listened as he heard her go up the staircase. The sound of her footsteps slowly faded away.

And then there was silence. Mario looked aimlessly at the wall, unsure of where to go from there.

* * *

"So what you're saying is that Donkey Kong would play King Kong, and Yoshi would play Godzilla."

"Well, Dr. Mario would have to find some way to make both of them ten times bigger."

"What studio would invest their money in this?"

"A smart one!" Marth retorted. Ike sighed in the background as Marth and Link argued over the movie prospects of a King Kong vs. Godzilla remake. Suddenly, Luigi turned a corner and walked into stride next to Ike.

"What are they doing?" he murmured, as the two swordsmen talked animatedly. Ike sighed.

"They saw King Kong vs. Godzilla on a sci-fi channel last night. Now they won't stop bickering about it."

"Boy," Luigi paused. "They're pretty bored, aren't they?"

"Yeah, suspension has pretty much gone to their heads." Ike grumbled. "And I've got to room with them."

"That's why I'm glad Kirby only knows eleven words." Luigi said, as the four smashers walked into the cafeteria. They picked up trays and walked over to the lunch line. "Anyhoo, you prepping for the Thanksgiving party?"

"Yeah. I feel bad that these clowns can't go." Ike indicated to Link and Marth, who were still arguing. Marth flung his arms up into the air while they waited on line, launching his bowl of oatmeal into the air. It landed on Bowser's head, and he proceeded to panic.

"I can't see! I can't see!" Bowser screamed, his eyes blinded by porridge. He began to run toward what he thought was the bathroom, but happened to be a wall. He crashed through the wall, still screaming, and ran off in the direction of the town. Marth failed to notice. Ike rolled his eyes.

"Actually, never mind. I feel no pity for either of them."

Luigi grinned as the four smashers took their trays and walked toward their usual table. Mario was sitting there, glumly rolling a grape around with a fork on the table. Ike and Luigi took seats on either sides of him, while Marth and Link sat across from them. Their argument had been paused by the scent of the waffles on their plates. They were now scarfing them down like madmen. Marth looked at his tray and raised an eyebrow.

"Hey, where's my oatmeal?"

"Mario, why don't you have any breakfast?" Luigi asked, ignoring Marth's question. Mario shrugged despondently.

"Not hungry."

"That doesn't sound like you," Luigi frowned. Mario looked down sadly and continued to roll around his grape, not responding to his brother's remark.

"Hey, where's Zelda?" Link frowned, looking up briefly from his food. Ike nodded toward the lunch line.

"Over there, talking to Peach," he said casually. Mario's eyes shot up at the sound of Peach's name. Rather than looking pleased, Luigi noticed, he looked panicked.

"Please don't sit here, please don't sit here…" Mario murmured.

"Hey, guys! Come sit over here!" Link waved jollily. Zelda and Peach, who were talking grimly under their breath, noticed Link. Peach saw Mario and immediately drew back; Zelda rolled her eyes, elbowed her, and walked over. Peach hesitantly followed.

"Hey, honey." Link said, as Zelda walked over to him. He paused as he noticed Peach hesitating at the table, looking for the furthest spot away from Mario. "Ike, don't be rude. Move over so Mario can sit next to his girlfriend."

Both Mario and Peach blushed. "No, Ike, it's alright, really…" Peach said, her face going red.

"No, no, sorry. I'm in the way." Ike scooted over a spot. Mario, Peach, and Zelda all looked appalled. Zelda tried to update Link.

"Link, honey, Peach and Mario—" she whispered under her breath. Link finished her sentence.

"Like sitting next to each other, I know." Link nodded at Mario, and then at Peach. "Don't worry, I got you guys covered."

Peach, unable to escape the impasse that had been created for her, pulled her dress up and took a seat. Mario and Peach looked away from each other shyly. Link didn't seem to notice.

"So, me and Marth are going to go see that action movie that's opening tomorrow. You guys in?"

"It's in 3D." Marth chimed in.

"Yeah, I'm not doing anything tomorrow." Luigi shrugged. Ike nodded in agreement, unable to speak as his mouth was full. Zelda smiled and took Link's hands in her own.

"Of course I'll come."

"Thanks, sweetie." Link smiled back. He wrapped his arms around Zelda and pulled her onto his lap. Marth looked away.

"And how about you guys?" Link looked over Zelda at Mario and Peach. "Can you two make it?"

Peach and Mario both blushed and looked away.

"I'm actually, doing laundry, that night…" Mario stuttered.

"Yes, yes, me too!" Peach nodded her head. "Thursday is always laundry night for me…"

Link raised an eyebrow. "The movie is on Friday. Today is Thursday."

Peach was at a loss for words. Mario desperately tried to cover them.

"Oh, Friday! Oh, well, we're both actually doing something that night…."

"Oh, I see." Link winked at Mario. "Having a special night together, eh?"

"No!" Mario shook his head vigorously. Peach was still at a loss for words. "No, it's not like that at all!"

"Alright, sure, Mario…" Link grinned. "We'll take you're word…"

"Yeah, we believe you." Marth chuckled.

"Just like we believe in monsters!" Luigi said, trying to get in on the joke. Suddenly, Bowser burst back into the cafeteria, the bowl of porridge still on his head. He swung his head around wildly, still blinded by the porridge.

"Monster!" Luigi screamed.

"Monster?" Bowser shouted, frightened. "Where?"

Panicked, the two smashers began to run in different directions. The bowl of porridge flew off Bowser's head and landed at Marth's feet. Marth looked down.

"That looks like my porridge." Marth frowned.

* * *

After breakfast, Mario and Peach both bolted in different directions from the table. Captain Falcon, whom Master Hand had forgotten to rehire, strolled in in a janitor's suit. He began to whistle as he swept up the oatmeal on the floor. When Link asked him what he was doing, he shrugged and cheerily responded "Any work is good work!"

Link, Zelda, Ike and Marth all walked out of the cafeteria. Link and Zelda quickly slipped their hands into each others; Marth walked slightly ahead of them. Ike, who walked next to Link, scratched his head.

"Peach and Mario were acting strange at breakfast, weren't they?"

"I noticed that too." Marth said, not looking over his shoulder. Zelda rolled her eyes.

"You guys are so slow."

"What do you mean?" Ike asked, puzzled. She sighed.

"They broke up last night."

Marth stopped in his tracks and turned around to stare at Link. They both exchanged a knowing look. Ike was still puzzled.

"What do you mean? Why?"

"I should have known," Link murmured. "Boy, I must have really looked like an idiot, eh?"

"That's no different from the ordinary, though." Marth shrugged. Link let go of Zelda's hand to playfully shove Marth.

"Guys, this is serious." Zelda said impatiently. The four smashers stopped in the lounge. Link set himself down in one of the plush chairs.

"I know, honey. I feel bad for them. But hey, maybe it's for the best."

"At least Mario can eat his carrot cakes unbothered now." Marth said, taking a seat next to Link. The two burst out laughing. Ike became more confused, utterly lost. Zelda sighed, not sitting down.

"It wouldn't hurt to have a little bit more sympathy."

Link, still grinning, shrugged. "I do empathize with Mario. Something similar happened to me a week ago." He mock glared at Zelda. She couldn't help but giggle. Marth looked down at his thumbs.

"Hey, guys, come look at this," Ike had walked over to the bulleting board and was now looking at a notice. Marth and Link got up and walked over, Zelda right behind them.

The three approached the chalkboard and quickly saw what Ike was looking at.

**Basketball Tryouts**

**When: This Saturday**

** Where: The Gymnasium**

** Be there!**

Link looked at Marth. "We going?"

Marth nodded. "Definitely."

"Hold on a sec, guys." Ike was still looking at the notice. He pointed at the bottom. "Look at this."

**Any smashers under suspension (a.k.a. Link and Marth) will not be able to make the team. This is due to their prevention from leaving the mansion, which the team will be required to do to play games. Sorry for any inconvenience.**

"What?" Link's jaw dropped. Zelda touched his shoulder.

"Link, you knew this suspension revoked many of your privileges…"

Link sighed and brushed her hand. "I suppose so…"

Marth was still staring at the bulletin board in shock. "I can't believe this."

Ike clamped his hand onto Marth's shoulder. "It'll be alright, man."

"No it won't!" Marth said childishly, spinning around. He looked desperately at Link. "How are we supposed to spend all this time now?"

Link shrugged, his arm wrapped around Zelda. "We'll find other things to do, man."

"Like what?" Marth demanded.

"If I may…" Crazy Hand floated up to the board. "I think I have a resolution to your problems."

Ike furrowed his eyebrows. "Where'd you come from?"

"Oh, I'm everywhere." Crazy Hand said cheerfully. "Even in your _toiletry bag._"

Link crinkled his nose. "Weird."

"Tell me about it." Crazy Hand nodded. Marth clucked his tongue.

"The resolution?" he asked impatiently.

"What resolution?" Crazy Hand stared at Marth blankly. "Oh, _right_, the resolution. Well, you may not know this, but I am a certified director of the arts."

"Seriously?" Link asked, eyebrows raised. Crazy Hand giggled.

"No, not seriously. But Mojo here watched The Making of Grease, so I figure he knows his stuff." He nodded toward his monkey, who was wearing a director's cap and sunglasses. The monkey took a cigar out and began to smoke it. Ike scratched his head.

"Wait, what does this have to do with anything?"

"The better question is, what does _anything_ have to do with _this_?" Crazy Hand raised an… well, he doesn't have eyebrows, does he? Ah well, he did some kind of thing with his face. Wait, he doesn't have one of those either. Dang.

Ike stared blankly back at Crazy Hand. He then shrugged. "This is lame." He walked away.

"Our _problem." _Marth coughed. Crazy Hand was snapped back to reality.

"Oh, isn't it obvious? Me and Mojo are co-creating this mansion's first ever musical."

"A musical?" Zelda asked curiously.

"What's that?" Crazy Hand responded vacuously. Link looked at Crazy Hand incredulously.

"You were just talking about a… musical…" Link said unsurely. Crazy Hand nodded.

"Of course I was. Did I mention that me and Mojo are co-creating this mansion's first ever musical?"

The three smashers just looked at Crazy with blank faces. He shrugged. "Well, tryouts are at five." He floated away. Zelda turned to Link.

"That could be fun."

Link nodded. "Yeah, I'd be into that."

Marth stared at the two of them in disbelief. "You two are seriously considering joining a musical?"

"What, are you too much of a man to sing and dance?" Zelda teased. Marth went slightly red.

"No, but I—and he—a _musical!"_ He stammered. Link began to laugh.

"Oh, now you're definitely doing it."

"No. Nuh-uh." Marth crossed his arms. "There is no way that I am going to participate in this."

"Oh, come on, Marth. Please?" Zelda asked. Marth's expression softened just a bit, but he still shook his head.

"No. I don't sing. Or dance."

"You're doing it." Link asserted.

"I am _not doing it_." Marth stomped his foot down on the ground.

* * *

"I can't believe I'm doing this."

Marth, Link and Zelda walked into the auditorium, Marth's face puckered. On the stage was Crazy Hand, floating above the wooden floor. Mojo sat on a stool, smoking a cigarette. The audience was littered with smashers who were interested; including Lyndis, Captain Falcon, Waluigi and all of Crazy Hand's monkeys, to name a few. Marth, Link and Zelda took seats in the back.

"Welcome, smashers!" Crazy Hand boomed. "Welcome to our first Smash Musical!"

Captain Falcon and Mojo's monkeys were the only ones who clapped. They slowly came to a stop as everyone glared at them.

"Now," Crazy began. "Because we will be working together, the most important thing for us to know is each other's names. I—"

"Um, Crazy?" Link piped up. "We've all sort of been living together for two months… we know each other's names."

"Excuse me, you do not interrupt the musical director when he is speaking." Crazy Hand sniffed. "Now, I would like for everyone to come up to the stage and introduce themselves. Also, tell us your occupation and your favorite brand of socks."

All of the smashers in the auditoriums exchanged exasperated glances. Of course, Crazy Hand's monkeys began the process. Each time, one would scurry up and make a series of screeching sounds. When he was finished, all of the other monkeys would break out into applause, screeching their approval. Captain Falcon was the first actual smasher to make his way to the stage.

"Hey. Wow. Can't believe I'm here." Captain Falcon chuckled. "The big stage! Right guys?"

There was silence from the audience.

"Well, my name is Captain Falcon, and I…"

"Get off the stage!" Donkey Kong yelled. Captain Falcon went red.

"Why don't you get off the stage?" he said stupidly.

"Maybe I will!" Donkey Kong retaliated. Also stupidly. Captain Falcon continued.

"I'm a dancer, and…"

The monkeys shrieked their disapproval and began to throw monkey poop at him. He put his hands up in front of his face.

"Aach! Wait, no! Let me finish!"

The barrage of poop came to a halt. He gasped for breath and continued.

"And I… I don't wear socks…"

Crazy Hand joined in on the poop flinging.

* * *

"Jesus Christ, that was a long day." Marth moaned. Link grimaced.

"You think you had it hard? Try having monkey poo flung right into your eye for not knowing what a jazz square was."

Marth sighed and unlocked the door to their room. Ike looked up from his book and raised an eyebrow.

"Gee, you guys look terrible." He observed.

"Thanks, man." Marth said sarcastically. Ike shrugged.

"Whatever. There's a letter for you two on the nightstand, by the way."

"Huh." Link walked over to the nightstand and picked up an envelope. Marth plopped down onto his bed.

"Who's it from?"

Link frowned. "It doesn't say. But," he frowned. "The return address is Altea."

Both Marth and Ike took sudden interest. "Well, read it." Marth said impatiently. Link tore the envelope open and took out a piece of paper. Marth and Ike got on either side of him and peered over his shoulder.

**Dear Marth and Link,**

** Guess who's coming back?**

** With love,**

** Roy**

Ike whimpered. Link and Marth turned to look at each other. Marth groaned.

"Oh boy, here we go."

* * *

Bustman: And that completes our special double edition of Life In Smash Mansion. The next chapter will be up soon (not as soon, though). I hope you enjoyed, and please remember to review!


	27. The One that Precedes Roy's Arrival

Bustman: It's me again! Back with a new chapter of Life In Smash Mansion that I'm sure all y'all will love.

Toon Link: I think they'd have an easier time loving it if it wasn't eight months overdue.

Bustman: Well… I guess that's possible.

Toon Link: Probable, even?

Bustman: Maybe so, but my charmingly good lucks will make up for it (flashes smile at all you readers).

Toon Link: I'm guessing you just scared off at least five people.

Bustman: Shut up, kid. I don't own anything, and I am sorry for the tardiness of this chapter! The next one will come sooner. Enjoy!

* * *

Mario blinked sleep out of his eyes as his alarm clock went off. He swung his legs out of bed, turned it off, and yawned. He sat by his bedside for a minute, unwilling to start the day, not seeing the point in getting out of bed and going to breakfast and interacting with people. Actually, not interacting, being condescended to. People repeatedly asking him if he was alright, if he was holding up okay, that he should eat because it will make him feel better. Mario snarled a little bit thinking about it. Each time this would happen he would nod indifferently and try to walk away. But there was no one in this mansion that didn't seem to be determined to check on him at least twice a day, and escaping from the pitying looks, the apologetic gestures, was near impossible.

Mario wished there were not so many people in this mansion. Because another thing that bothered him, as irritating as all the sympathy was, was the fact that people continued to be happy all around him. His happiness had been robbed of him in a matter of minutes, but nothing changed for these smashers. Life went on for them, while life lacked meaning for him. Mario sighed and walked into the bathroom. He turned on the shower tap and stepped in. The warm water was comforting, but could not relieve him of his pain.

And the worst thing about this, of course, was still having to see Peach every day. The awkwardness, the tension that existed between them now. She had promised friendship, but Mario had quickly found that being simply friends with the woman he once loved was easier said then done. Whenever he and Peach were together now, he was so unsure of what to say; he wanted to talk sweetly to her again, to make her laugh, to make her happy; but he quite simply couldn't. Mario hated this state of awkwardness; he wanted their old relationship back, it was so easy, so fun, so carefree. He had been so happy; however, he felt hollow now. He turned off the shower and dried himself off. He looked at himself in the mirror; he had began to grow stubble, and his mustache was messy and unkempt. His eyes were saggy; he remembered a time when they were full of vigor and life. As he put on his overalls, he wondered whether they would ever be alive in that same way again.

* * *

"Mister Hand, a Mr. Link and a Mr. Marth are here to see you."

"Send them in," Master Hand spoke calmly into his intercom. It was not but a few seconds after giving this command that the doors to his office burst open. Link stormed in, followed by Marth. They both looked displeased.  
"How can I help you, boys?" Master Hand asked.

"The better question is, how can you help Ike?" Link said bitterly. "Roy is coming back?"

"Yes, he is." Master Hand said apathetically. "He is due to arrive here tomorrow, he has to catch up to the rest of you smashers, we're already three months into this game."

"Why?" Marth asked incredulously. "He was nothing but trouble on Melee, I'm sure you remember!"  
"If my memory serves me correctly, so were you two." Master Hand shot back. "What was that silly name you boys gave yourselves? The prankster gang?"

This hushed Marth up. However, Link continued to glare at Master Hand. "Ike is terrified, I hope you know. Roy can be great, but there is an uncontrollable side to him. Do you remember the fit he threw when he was dismissed?"

"Nothing is uncontrollable." Master Hand affirmed. "Roy has confided in me that he has no hard feelings toward Ike anymore-"

"Roy says a lot of things he doesn't mean." Marth cut in. Master Hand gave him a stern look.

"We will take all precautions necessary to make sure that neither smasher feels uncomfortable. Marth, you will room with Roy; Link will continue to room with Ike."

Marth and Link exchanged a glance. Link turned back to Master Hand and said "That's not fair."

"Life isn't fair." Master Hand retorted. "And Marth, I must say I'm a little bit surprised of your displeasure to this news. If anything, I thought you would be grateful for it."

"Grateful?" Marth sounded surprised. "I mean no disrespect, Master Hand, me and Roy are friends, but I just don't think these are the right circumstances to..."

"That's not what I mean." Master Hand explained. "The reason I am bringing Roy back is to avert attention away from you and your little... incident with Zelda."

Marth looked sheepishly down. Link also looked thrown off. Master Hand continued.

"Hopefully the new addition of another Fire Emblem character on this game will allow people to shift their interests off of you and onto him. You should be thankful to Roy for coming back on such short notice. Now, I want you boys to help Roy feel as welcome here as he was on Melee."

"I don't think he'll need our help for that." Link muttered. Master Hand looked back down at his papers.

"Anything else, boys?"

Silence.

"Good. You may leave."

* * *

"So, how long have you know this Roy?"

"Oh, I don't know. I've only met him a couple of times, I replaced him."

"And his reaction to that was negative?"

"Yes, it was very negative." Ike groaned. Mewtwo nodded and scribbled something down onto his notepad. Cranky Kong piped up.

"So what the heck are you afraid of? Your twice the size of most of the people in this mansion, you can't take down this Rob character in a confrontation?"

"Roy," Ike corrected. "And I don't like fighting. I don't want to fight. But I'm afraid Roy... he's going to look for a fight, because I replaced him."

"So the real problem here is that you don't like direct confrontation." Cranky Kong leaned back in his chair. "Sissy."

"Aren't you counselors supposed to give me advice?" Ike asked, a little bit offended.

"Look, the way I see this is that Roy's being replaced was not your fault." Mewtwo said wisely. "You were offered a job, and you took it. It just happened that Roy was fired when you were brought on board. Maybe you should try explaining to him that his anger is misdirected."

"Well, that's not entirely true." Ike said uneasily. "...I knew what would happen to Roy if I accepted the job. Master Hand explained to me that I was a replacement."

"Does Ron know that?" Cranky Kong inquired.

_"Roy." _Ike corrected again. "And I don't think so. Or at least, I can't think of a reason why he would. But... I don't want to lie to the guy."

"It's not lying, it's not mentioning the truth." Mewtwo pointed out. "There's a difference."

"Either way, I'm afraid Roy still has a bone to pick with me. And I don't want to have any enemies here at the mansion. So what should I do?"

"Maybe talking to him is the best thing to do." Mewtwo suggested. "See if things are 'cool' between the two of you. If you think he's gotten over it, you have nothing to worry about. If you think he hasn't... come see us again."

"And man up." Cranky Kong recommended. Ike sighed and got up.

"Okay. Thanks for your time."

* * *

Samus waited by the gates of the mansion, her long blonde hair flowing down her back. She sported a black, button up coat, covering up a purple tank top. She wore black jeans, unripped in a departure from her usual style. She shifted her weight from one foot to the other, somewhat impatiently. She leaned against the gate and checked her watch. She stared cooly out into the trees that surrounded the mansion. Her hands moved toward her pocket as she felt her phone vibrate.

_Are you with Wolf yet?_

Samus pursed her lips at this text from Zelda. She thought for a second, then pressed the reply button.

_Not here yet. He's ten minutes late. I'll give the fucker another five before he's dumped._

Samus wrapped her arms around herself, shivering a little bit as the wind picked up. She wondered where on earth Wolf could be; he had made this date with her (their first) back on Tuesday, and he had promised to meet her outside of the mansion at 8. Samus looked back at her phone as it vibrated once more. It was 8:11. She sighed, and looked at Zelda's text.

_Do you want me to check his room?_

Samus chuckled bitterly to herself and shook her head to herself. She texted back loudly and angrily, with a furious purpose.

_No need. He'll show up or he won't. At this point I don't care either way. He has three more minutes before I retire back to my room to watch a horror movie on my own._

Samus shoved her phone back into her pocket and sighed. She had lied; she did, in fact care, whether or not Wolf showed up. Although she would never show it, she had been looking forward to the date all week. There was something about that Wolf, something in his inaccessibility, his ruggedness, the way he cut himself off from the rest of the world, that intrigued her. Intrigued her to the point of turning her on. It was curiosity that led her to accepting to go out with him; but it was genuine attachment, now, that made her wish he would show up. Wolf's protective barrier that he put up around himself was slowly, but steadily, coming down, and the more they did, the more Samus liked him. There was something about him that made her feel so safe; even though he seemed detached, even to the point of moroseness, he always looked at her with affection in his eyes.

It made her feel special, the fact that he was so cut off from everyone else but was willing to always talk to her. And that, she knew, was what a good boyfriend should do; make a girl feel special.

But Samus did not feel so special as she looked back at her phone and saw that it was now 16 minutes past eight. She looked down glumly and drummed her fingers against the gate.

_Five more minutes_, she thought to herself. But she knew that she couldn't. Samus, also, put up a show of distance from everyone else, of not caring. She had to maintain that; she could never be the girl who would wait 20 minutes for a guy to arrive late. She was too proud, even too blasé, to let herself do that. Somewhat defeated, but still with her head held high, she let herself let go of the gate and walked briskly back to the mansion.

* * *

"He didn't come?" was Krystal's greeting, as Samus opened the door to her room.

"No," Samus said, as flatly as she possibly could. "Is he even at the mansion?"

"I know a lot of the guys went to go to Applebee's around six," Krystal said casually, "but I'm not sure whether Wolf was among them."

"Well, screw him." Samus took her coat off and hung it on the coat rack in the corner of the room. "I'm not gonna wait all night for his ass."

"Are you going to call him?" Krystal asked inquisitively, crossing her legs on the bed. Samus snorted.

"You kidding me? He can call me with his apology. And I won't pick up."

"I don't blame you," Krystal said sympathetically. "Darling, the guys in this mansion have been such assholes lately. What with Mario standing up Peach, Link smothering Zelda, Marth freakin' cutting her arm open…"

"Yeah, well, that was an accident." Samus said, almost defensively. Krystal shrugged.

"Still no way to treat a girl."

"Link didn't realize he was smothering Zelda. I wouldn't even call it smothering… just being overprotective. And needy."

"And Mario?"

"Well, he's just an asshole."

Krystal chuckled. "Someone needs to teach men a lesson."

"I don't think they'll ever learn," Samus sighed. "They're just so _stupid._"

"Word." Krystal got up and pulled out a bottles of tonic water and a glass. She yanked a bottle of gin out of the ice box, and poured the two into the glass. She handed the drink to Samus. "I'd break up with him if I were you, Samus."

"I intend to." Samus said, somewhat unconvincingly. Krystal raised her eyebrow skeptically and got up.

"If you say so dear. I'm going to shower up and go to sleep," She walked toward the bathroom and said casually, "your hair looks pretty put down."

"Thanks," said Samus distantly. She took a sip of the gin and tonic, and set it down on the nightstand. She stared out the window, listening to Krystal turn on the shower. Suddenly, her phone vibrated in her pocket. She took it out of her pocket and looked.

Wolf was calling her. Samus' finger hovered above the 'Accept Call' button, but she gritted her teeth and put the phone on the nightstand next to her drink. Slowly, a little bit sadly, she turned off the light.


End file.
